What Your Baby’s Crib Says About You

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4. You have a crib from IKEA

Flimsy wooden pegs instead of screws and no actual directions on how to put it together. Once your baby hits her toddler years, you’ll be what they call “the fun parent”.

5. Your baby has a crib that can convert to a toddler bed and eventually a queen sized bed frame.

Spare me the story about how buying this behemoth is an “investment”. I’ve never heard of a bed surviving the rough and tumble elementary school years and making it all the way to a child’s adulthood. Even if it did, the thought of your child and their spouse getting down on the same bed where one of them once shat themselves may prevent you from ever having grandkids.

6. Your baby sleeps on a custom ordered circular crib

You know people will tell you that a crib which requires custom made sheets and a special mattress is extravangant, but you can’t hear those haters. You’re too busy making a mental list of all the things you’re going to buy your BFF Oprah for Christmas this year.


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  1. keelhaulrose

    November 9, 2014 at 10:02 am

    I bought the convertible crib because it was what Target had and fuck going to ten stores looking for the right crib. It was a gift and has survived two toddlers thus far (little one is still in it and she treats it like her personal jungle gym). Worth it.

    • Jessifer

      November 9, 2014 at 10:21 am

      Yup! I was given a hand-me-down crib which we managed to assemble with great difficulty (no instructions!). When we moved, we had to disassemble it and things went downhill. After several hours of fiddling around, we finally said “Fuck this!”, threw it in the dumpster, and bought a crib online from Wal-Mart (free delivery!) It just so happens to convert into a toddler bed and a bed frame for a double bed. Perfect! When he’s old enough, we’ll put our own double mattress in his room, then upgrade our own for a queen size. Everyone wins!

  2. aCongaLine

    November 9, 2014 at 10:20 am

    We got the convertable crib. It is amazing and awesome and lovely, and did the trick for our older kid when we were too lazy to buy her a toddler bed until the baby REALLY didn’t fit in the bassinet anymore. The only trouble is that it’s too wide to fit through door frames in our house (thanks, 1930s… ugh) so when we moved it from one room to another when it switched kids, we had to totally disassemble/reassemble. But that’s not the crib’s fault- stupid grand old house.

    worth the money- my kids beat that thing up, and it’s holding firm! Also, now I don’t have to buy a toddler bed for the baby… because it’s already there. #lazyparenting

    • Jamie

      November 9, 2014 at 12:18 pm

      Our house was built in 2004 and we can’t get the cribs in the doorways without taking them apart either, so it isn’t necessarily your old house. (We discovered this when we had to move all three cribs out of the nursery to put new carpet in after it flooded.)

    • aCongaLine

      November 9, 2014 at 12:29 pm

      Ah! interesting. It’s such a pain, huh?

  3. Cindy Ailey

    November 9, 2014 at 10:39 am

    Pretty much all cribs are convertible cribs these days aren’t they? I don’t think I’ve been to a store that had cribs that were *just* cribs.

    I bought mine from a yard sale, it’s a convertible style, but the people I bought from said their son wanted bunk beds so they never bought the rails that would turn it into a full size. Now the company that made the crib doesn’t exist anymore – so when the time comes we will have to buy a whole new bed for our princess.

  4. TigersInLove

    November 9, 2014 at 11:24 am

    Ikea cribs FTW! Both my wee ones sleep great in their respective Sniglars, they are much sturdier than you’d think, and we didn’t have to take out a second mortgage to afford two cribs. Win-win-win!

    • Jessie Lamontagne

      November 9, 2014 at 12:23 pm

      Yeah, I researched them and they are highly rated for safety, convert to a toddler bed and cost much, much less than any other comparable crib. Also, I’m a moron with assembling stuff and I thought the instructions were pretty easy to follow.

    • OptimusPrime*

      November 9, 2014 at 5:09 pm

      Definitely! No kids on my end, but lots of nannying. The IKEA cribs meet the Scandinavian and European standards which are way higher than the US ones for safety. You’re basically buying a cheap, non-oval Stokke in terms of quality.

    • Lilly

      November 9, 2014 at 1:15 pm

      I live in a small house with small rooms — Ikea does a lot of good smaller furniture so yeah Ikea FTW. Had the one up from the sniglar only because they were sold out and I did not want to do a second trip. Son has moved to the Kura flippable bed so in a year or so we’ll flip it to gain a bit more play space.

    • Her Vajesty

      November 10, 2014 at 9:31 am

      Yeah, I love their cribs!! I have a plain wood crib, it’s seriously gorgeous and only cost $70.

    • ktbay

      November 10, 2014 at 2:11 pm

      We rock a Sundvik, and it’s my favorite thing. Ever.

    • emilyg25

      November 10, 2014 at 3:21 pm

      The first thing my husband did after assembling our $70 Ikea crib is climb in it to “test it out.” He weighs 200 lbs. The crib didn’t budge. Best $70 we’ve spent.

  5. Grr! Arrgh!

    November 9, 2014 at 11:33 am

    Confession: I meticulously researched all of our major baby purchases because that’s the kind of person I am. But the crib – we bought that because I walked into Buy Buy Baby, saw it and started crying while saying, “This is where my baby is going to sleep.” Luckily it was mid-priced and convertible so I can pretend afterwards that it’s practical, but really, it’s just pregnancy hormones.

    (Clearly this is my first and only child.)

    • kimanderson

      November 10, 2014 at 11:01 am

      just as Joanne answered I am blown away that anyone can ­make 9281USD in 28 day on the ;’computer . why not find out more.


  6. Harriet Meadow

    November 9, 2014 at 11:39 am

    Our baby is sleeping in a convertible crib that was used by my baby brother, my nephew, and my niece before it was handed to us. It’s also a drop-side crib. So we’re cheap and reckless, apparently.

    • Jamie

      November 9, 2014 at 12:23 pm

      We are too! Our oldest has a fancy, modern, convertible crib that is currently a toddler bed, but when we discovered we were having twins, we had to go as cheaply as possible, so we have my my stepkids’ dropside for one baby and my nieces’ dropside for the other. They’re each the fourth kid to sleep in them, they’ll be fine, right?

    • Looby

      November 9, 2014 at 1:43 pm

      I actually wanted a drop side crib because I’m so short. Boozle has spent the last 5 months being dropped the last six inches into her crib.
      We bought the cheapest full size crib from Babies R US because it was even cheaper than the Ikea one

    • aheb

      November 9, 2014 at 10:25 pm

      Ours isn’t a drop side, but I intentionally got the shortest crib I could (rails are standard of course, but the whole thing is low to the ground.) My dad is 6’4″ and he came over and complained about how short it was, and I was like, I’m short too, and it’s my baby and my house. Shoulda given me your tall genes.

    • Amanda

      November 9, 2014 at 10:32 pm

      For baby #2 we got this amazing crib from friends of friends that’s got a changing table (never been used) and all kinds of drawers and shelves built in. It’s a bohemith and almost useless EXCEPT the nifty feature where the front can fold down and then relatch so us tiny people don’t have to just drop the kid. It’s a lifesaver.

    • KaeTay

      November 9, 2014 at 1:57 pm

      just be careful with the drop side.. they don’t make them anymore for a reason.

    • Kristen

      November 9, 2014 at 9:44 pm

      Hand me down drop-side as well. We never use the drop-side, though.

  7. Amanda

    November 9, 2014 at 12:29 pm

    No crib. Pack n plays all the way, baby! With our first, we were recent college grads in 2010 when the economy was in the crapper, and we were terribly poor. We got a pack n play because #1- cheaper and #2- we were super hopeful we were going to move in the near future and wanted something that would be easy to move around. We DID get a job in 2011 when the baby was about 5 months old, but never bothered to switch. By the time baby 2 came around, I was so used to the ease of a pack n play that we just didn’t bother. I’m excepting #3, and I think I’ll get a new pack n play (the last one has gotten a little trashed with two kids…) and keep our system.

    • Hibbie

      November 9, 2014 at 1:42 pm

      How long were you able to use the pack ‘n play before moving on to a bed or something else? I’m using a pack ‘n play for my second, but am not sure if I should go ahead and get rid of the crib.

    • Amanda

      November 9, 2014 at 1:54 pm

      Both of my daughters figured out how to climb out of the pack n play at around 2. At that point, we moved my older into a twin sized bed (we’re all about avoiding useless sleeping structures in our house, so we skipped the toddler bed). My younger is currently 2 and learned how to climb out 2 months ago, but we’ve kinda just kept her in it anyway, she seems to still find sleeping with the four walls comforting. We just locked her bedroom door for a couple days so she knew she wasn’t allowed to get out and wander. Anyway, she’s currently 2 years and 2 months old, about 25 pounds and she’s still very happily sleeping in her pack n play. I’m due in May with baby number three, so we hope to move her in with our oldest daughter on a twin bed sometime in the next three months. Hope that helps!

    • Hibbie

      November 9, 2014 at 2:12 pm

      I’m relieved that is possible to go from a pack ‘n play to a bed. The crib is a behemoth and taking up valuable storage space!

    • KaeTay

      November 9, 2014 at 1:56 pm

      I switched the moment she was trying to climb out of it and had the ability to eventually do it. About a year and a half for me.. she LOVED her toddler bed the moment she saw it.

    • Véronique the Attachment Shark

      November 9, 2014 at 2:30 pm

      I kept the pack and play for my first until I got her a transitional toddler bed at Ikea when she was 18 months old. That thing is great. It grows with the child and has three different sizes. And when they sell you the mattress, it comes with the extensions. And they even sell you the sheets all together for all three sizes. And it’s super cute. She adores that bed.

  8. NotTakenNotAvailable

    November 9, 2014 at 12:50 pm

    Ahhh, number 5. I don’t know if convertible cribs were even a thing when I needed somewhere for my diapered ass to sleep back in the mid-eighties, but I did get a twin bed in my “new” bedroom when we moved in ’89. That bed lasted me until the house went into foreclosure in 2007, though by “lasted,” I mean that the frame collapsed when I was in fifth grade (1996, for those of you who like my date-tracking system) and my mother refused to buy me a new bed that didn’t have the head tilted directly into the wall.

    I didn’t understand her rationale until (and I have told this tale before; apologies if it sounds familiar) I brought my then-boyfriend home during college break after confirming, multiple times, that it would be okay with her if he came along and–this is important–shared a room and its lone bed with me. The first morning after we got in and, yes, shared a bed in the way that most amorous young couples who haven’t yet figured out their sexual incompatibilities do, my mother accosted me in the kitchen with, “YOU FUCKED IN YOUR BABY BED?!? I can’t BE-LIEVE you FUCKED in your BABY BED!!!!!!!!”

    So yeah, it’s my personal and admittedly strictly anecdotal experience that if you buy a sleeping space for your kid(s) and expect it to last until adulthood, you got some serious issues you may want to address with a therapist before you have kids in the first place.

    • shel

      November 9, 2014 at 1:10 pm

      It’s not completely the same though… unless you’re crib mattress was a full size mattress…
      The mattress we’re going to use when it turns into a big bed will be a different one than what’s in the crib now, since that’s a tiny mattress.
      I mean, if you did it in your childhood bedroom, the walls are the same as when you were a kid/ the dresser, the random teenbeat poster on the wall… why does a bed frame matter?

    • NotTakenNotAvailable

      November 9, 2014 at 1:33 pm

      In this case, it was because only the back part of the frame collapsed, so I spent the remaining eight years that I lived full-time with my mother sleeping with my feet elevated and my head constantly sliding towards (sometimes into!) the wall. I don’t really have a good explanation for why we couldn’t at least remove the frame, but I will suggest that if you’d like the bed to outlast elementary school, make sure it’s high quality and that you don’t get so attached to it (or to the memories of your child’s younger and needier days, as I’m sure was my mom’s problem) that you can’t replace it if it gets damaged.

      ETA since I didn’t clarify well enough in the first place that the crib and this bed weren’t the same sleep space, though it did take an inordinately long time before the crib finally left my room…I think I may have been in second or third grade when that finally happened. :/

    • AP

      November 9, 2014 at 2:16 pm

      I had the same mattress from 2-3 until I was 16-17. It was hard as a rock and I finally got permission to replace the mattress when the springs started threatening to sproing. The bed frame’s still there, but the “new” mattress, lightly used since I went away to college and then moved out shortly after we got it, is so comfortable no one wants to get rid of the bed.

    • NotTakenNotAvailable

      November 9, 2014 at 4:21 pm

      I’m jealous! I was kind of excited about my dorm bed because, while it wasn’t the comfiest mattress around, it was at least level. Eight years of begging got me nothing on the new mattress front.

    • Samwisegamgeeeisthebesthobbit

      November 10, 2014 at 9:20 am

      So she set you up? She let you share a room and expected zero sex? Then she called you on it in the morning? Not cool.

  9. Jenna

    November 9, 2014 at 1:08 pm

    My 2 month old is still in the basinet for now, but our actual crib is my 14 year old brother’s who was 6 when I got pregnant with my oldest son. My mom and I both have a knack for unplanned pregnancies.

  10. Véronique the Attachment Shark

    November 9, 2014 at 1:15 pm

    Baby number one: pack and play because we had a one-bedroom apartment and a crib wouldn’t have fit into the corner of our room. Baby number two: Ikea. But I painted it navy blue to personalize it a little bit.

  11. shorty_RN

    November 9, 2014 at 1:47 pm

    My son was a laundry basket kid for the first month or so. I regret nothing.

  12. KaeTay

    November 9, 2014 at 1:53 pm

    #5 is what I have.. the bed is sturdy as fuck even with her jumping up and down on it. Also.. they won’t be taking it with them.. it then becomes the guest bed once they are out of the house. I did use a pack n play for awhile.. she had a habit of rolling into the crib walls and waking herself up.. so we got rid of the crib for a short time.

  13. Tk

    November 9, 2014 at 2:45 pm

    So I have a – second hand (cheap) “egg shaped” (custom bedding), IKEA (small, easy to put together) crib, so I tick a few boxes. I love it though, and our house is tiny, and I’ll be honest I pinned a lot of nurseries with round cribs…

    • brebay

      November 11, 2014 at 5:27 pm

      Sounds cool, I’ve never seen a round crib, I’ll have to go Pinteresting!

  14. Ali

    November 9, 2014 at 5:01 pm

    I never had a cot/crib. My parents bought a king single bed, and Dad created a frame for it and nailed wooden slats for bars onto it. Mum just shorted sheeted it until I was old enough for the doona, and that bed lasted me a good 10 years. If i ever have a kid, I think i’ll do the same!

  15. cas

    November 9, 2014 at 7:07 pm

    For the first 8 months my son slept in a pack and play because we got it on sale and it was all we could afford. Now he has a drop-side crib that we got at goodwill. So…the reckless parents?

  16. mamaduck_75

    November 9, 2014 at 7:15 pm

    I got a great deal on a simple crib, no bumper. We used it maybe 10 times throughout her infancy…usually just to put her in while I cleaned in the bedroom (our room, due to lack of space). Until she was about 3 months, I used the bassinet when I was awake, and then coslept at night. I wasn’t going to, but about 2 weeks in, when I startled myself awake while in the process of dropping her (and took note of the drool from me on her head), I decided something had to give. I felt fine cosleeping…not a smoker, never used much more than a sheet and flat pillow (hot natured), and not only am I a light sleeper, but I literally can go most of the night and not even change positions. It was wonderful…she and I stirred only for nursing, and were still actually half asleep.

    At 5, she sleeps in her own bedroom (except for normal night fears that interupt her sleep occasionally), and we never had one ounce of trouble with transition. My personal belief is that almost from the beginning, bed time was never stressful for her, but rather a relaxing, sweet experience with her parents…I honestly feel that’s why we never had any trouble with transitioning her to her own bed. We also started out with rewards…no pushing, no hurry, just every night she slept in her own bed, she got a star, and at the end of the week, if she had so many stars, she got to pick a prize. I’m happy with the choices we made.

  17. Kite

    November 10, 2014 at 2:24 am

    Hmm, we bought a cheap Chinese knockoff baby hammock and adjusted it with bits of truck inner tube. Resourceful? Then we put it right next to the parental bed, because who can be arsed going into another room to breastfeed 10 times a night? Plus, you can set it swinging practically in your sleep. Toddler now has a crappy old freecycled cot in the other room, because who can be arsed trying to tiptoe around him in our room? So… this says we’re minimally-give-a-fuck semi-hippies?

    My friends used an Ikea cot from day dot, it prematurely broke, they took it back and got some stick for having an overly heavy or active baby (?!), but eventually Ikea replaced it.

    • brebay

      November 11, 2014 at 8:57 pm

      You had me at truck inner tube…

  18. ChickenKira

    November 10, 2014 at 3:34 am

    #4 here.
    Purchased mainly because it came in a bundle set with a wardrobe and a change table and the house we were living in at the time didn’t have built in robes.

    But I do quite like it, natural wood finish. I’m not a paint kind of person.

  19. Samwisegamgeeeisthebesthobbit

    November 10, 2014 at 9:16 am

    How about craigslist? What does that say? I personally think it means frugal and responsible. My MIL however says cheap and poor. Doesn’t matter anyway, he’s hasn’t slept a single night in it. Apparently we were the bed sharing kind of people and we didn’t know it.

    • brebay

      November 11, 2014 at 5:26 pm

      Ha! That was us. NEVER thought about co-sleeping, until I had a colicky baby and no sleep for weeks on end. He slept in the car seat on the coffee table for the first few weeks (the only position she stayed asleep in for longer than 20 minutes), then with me on the couch, then on the floor with blankets (still with me) and finally into a twin bed (no frame) at 18 months. Total nights spent in crib: 0.

    • Samwisegamgeeeisthebesthobbit

      November 11, 2014 at 8:11 pm

      Yeah, the things you’ll do in the name of sleep. That’s pretty much exactly what happened to us too.

  20. brebay

    November 10, 2014 at 2:34 pm

    Mine said “This is what my sister-in-law liked when she bought my nephew’s crib, and I like not having to pay for stuff…”

  21. Ashley Austrew

    November 10, 2014 at 3:51 pm

    My Ikea crib has screws, converts to a toddler bed, and has lasted through two kids. WHAT. haha

  22. th3hbomb

    November 11, 2014 at 3:02 pm

    Laundry basket. Or as we referred to it, the baskinet. Our kid slept in it for the first 6 weeks of his life before he moved into his crib. We just couldn’t figure spending $70 for a Moses basket or $100+ for a bassinet when we had this handy dandy $12 plastic basket that was just the right size. 😛

    • brebay

      November 11, 2014 at 8:59 pm

      Exactly. Just hope you don’t have any nosy neighbors. Moses basket = hipster, laundry basket = child abuse…

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