Ah childbirth. What a magical, beautiful, terrifying, frightening experience. That’s what childbirth feels like. There are so many unknown variables that it’s impossible to anticipate what the heck it’s going to be like. Not to mention that literally every single pregnancy is so very different. In a Facebook post by the page The Ugly Volvo, hundreds of women chimed in on what childbirth really feels like and the answers are some of the most hilarious and terrifying things you will ever come across. Having experienced childbirth once myself, I definitely found myself shaking my head in agreement with some of the sentiments expressed, and curling away in horror, thanking God that something like that didn’t happen to me. A lot of things that happen during childbirth (and after!) are absolutely hilarious. They may not be in the exact moment (I still tense up thinking about that first postpartum poop. Seriously, my butt clenches just writing about it) but in hindsight you will crack up about it.
The good thing is that even though some things are only true of you and your specific pregnancy, a lot of these experiences are universal. It gives us who have gone through it something to commiserate over and therefore bond. It also makes for great conversation starters when you’re talking to a mom, or an excellent way to horrify your friend who is pregnant with her first child, or your friend who is trying to get pregnant, or your friend who never wants to have children (and the way I tell stories, they are sure they made the best decision.) I mean, it’s a beautiful experience for most of us, this is true. But there are some not so nice parts to it and those deserve to be talked about just as much or your friend will come back to you and ask why you didn’t tell them about the awful terrible thing they experienced. And seriously, what kind of friend would you be if you did that?
1. A blubbering mess indeed
2. What is sleep?
3. Sex? Never Again.
4. Vagina explosion? Yikes.
5. Your guts will fall out
6. Who will take care of mom? No one
7. That poop is a killer
8. The first latch is the deepest
9. No really, how?
10. Your guts are willy nilly
11. But..like…I can’t?
12. Don’t feel guilty
Whether it was hilarious or heartbreaking, terrific or terrifying, us mommas keep having babies, which goes to show that it is truly mind over matter. Will you share what childbirth feels like in the comments? Let us know the good, bad, ugly, and amazing.