Move Over Lawn Darts, The Toothpick Crossbow Is The Dumbest Toy Ever Invented
Dangerous toys are like Jedi. If you cut one down, it will come back more powerful than ever. We banned lawn darts, but now there’s a new extraordinarily stupid toy in the world, and it’s way worse than fidget spinners. Kids in China are playing with tiny little toothpick crossbows. Seriously. A toothpick crossbow is really just a tiny crossbow that uses a toothpick as a bolt, and it’s so dangerous several cities banned them from being sold.
According to Sora News 24, toothpick crossbows are the hot new toy craze making parents in China pull all their hair out. The tiny crossbows cost about a dollar, and they are actually really powerful. A toothpick fired at close range can pierce plastic or get lodged in wood or stuck in a wall. The toys seem tailor-made for shooting at people or animals, too.
Just check out this video of a toothpick crossbow in action.
Nobody should play with toothpick crossbows.
Thee toothpick crossbow is meant to fire toothpicks, but you can also load it with needles if you are out of your fucking mind. A tiny crossbow with a needle in it can puncture a soda can.
According to the BBC, parents in China have been complaining on the Internet about toothpick crossbows and trying to figure out how to get them banned. Parents say the kids really are shooting them at each other, because they’re kids and they don’t seem to understand the danger involved. The grown-ups, however, are well aware that if you give a million kids a bunch of toothpick crossbows, it’s only a matter of time before somebody loses an eye.
Parents are like, “Stop shooting each other! WTF?!”
Parents are having a hard time keeping toothpick crossbows out of kids’ hands, because they’re available everywhere. They cost a dollar, maybe $1.50 for a fancier one, and they’re available all over the Internet. Shops and independent vendors have been selling them near schools, too.
Two of China’s main online marketplaces, Taobao and JD.Com, both said they’d stop allowing their sellers to sell toothpick crossbows, but toothpick crossbows are still available from plenty of other sites.
Several cities already banned toothpick crossbows, but parents want them banned nationwide.
Whatever happened to slap bracelets? Can we just have slap bracelets back?
What do you think of toothpick crossbows? Let us know in the comments.