Real-Life Grinches Steal Christmas Presents From Needy Kids
Stealing Christmas presents from needy children is such an awful thing to do that it sounds unbelievable that anybody would do it unironically. (I picture hipster criminals in prison trying to out-Scrooge one another and ending up like this.) But someone genuinely decided to steal Christmas gifts from poor children, and I can only assume the heist was handled by an Ocean’s 11 team of professional thieves including the Sheriff of Nottingham, the Grinch who stole Christmas, Scrooge, and the vengeful ghost of Tiny Tim out to make sure nobody gets a Christmas this year.
According to Fox Q13, the thieves emptied a Salvation Army storage unit in Port Angeles, Wash., of a store of video games, bicycles, electronics, backpacks, DVDs, toys, and other items that were meant to be distributed to poor children at a party later this week.
Police say two men were seen leaving the storage unit sometime early Sunday morning, and they believe the thieves had to make multiple trips to make sure they stole the whole Christmas and didn’t leave any last bit of joy in one of the corners or something.
I hope the thieves just didn’t know what they were stealing, and will read this, feel like absolute jerks, and return everything. In the meantime, the KONP radio station says it is holding an emergency toy drive to try to replace as many of the toys as possible.