Parents Describe What Sex After Kids Is Really Like in 13 Hilarious Tweets

A lot of things become harder after having kids, like eating candy without your kids begging for it, using the bathroom in peace, and watching television where the characters AREN’T animated and turn to the screen to ask you questions. But perhaps the most frustrating change is sex after kids (or the lack thereof). Remember those care free days of having sex where and whenever you want it? No? Me neither. And neither do these funny parents.

So, what is sex after kids really like, well, it’s a mix, according to these parents:

1. Sleep is sexy

There’s nothing sexier than a well-rested partner.

2. If this isn’t #MomLife, I don’t know what is.

https://twitter.com/lifebeforemom/status/819717606840078337

Multitasking at its finest.

3. And this sums up #DadLife.

Focus on the joy of cargo shorts.

4. The timing has to be just right.

I was told there would be no math.

5. She has a good point

Or at least, you know, also napping.

6. We love it when you talk dirty.

But that wasn’t exactly what we had in mind.

7. This is my “feeling sexy” outfit.

https://twitter.com/ashleyaustrew/status/690696435042365440

And I’m not wearing any underwear (because I haven’t done the laundry).

8. When you decide to really put in the effort.

You even shaved your legs.

9. Texting is decidedly less-hot.

“Can you pick up some Vagisil?” “Where are the nose hair clippers?”

10. You’d better work fast.

Love is sharing forbidden snacks.

11. Remove the tiny hazards.

https://twitter.com/Gooooats/status/624051169292226562

Don’t think about the cars all over the floor.

12. And the big hazards, too.

https://twitter.com/TheGladStork/status/693178127170822144

I just spent 20 minutes folding that!!!

13. I think she’s talking about us.

I see what you did there.

What is sex after kids like for you in your relationships? Let us know in the comments!

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(Image: iStock / YakobchukOlena)

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