1. The Bloody Eyeball, because terrifying Halloween pumpkins see all
This is eerily similar to what I look like when I sleep in my contacts. Also: NOPE.
2. Space Monster
I want to admire this person's silver spray-painting skills but I can't because what in the ever loving f*ck is this?!?! *shudders, googles pictures of kittens*
3. Walking Pumpkin Dude Missing Half His Face, Dear God
"I'm thinking this year, we not only shred half the pumpkin's face off, but we attach it to a body that's hooked up to a motorized contraption that makes it walk in place!"
"Dear god, you're brilliant."
[They kiss passionately on a table covered in pumpkin seeds.]
I mean, they're kind of cute right? Just tunneling around that pumpkin, ratting around like a pack of rats?
5. Vermin 2: The Vermining
Nope, nope, I was wrong - definitely not cute.
6. The Carnivore
Well, this is terrifying and also an awful way to die.
7. The Carnivore 2: The Carnivore Is Even Hungrier This Year
Oh, and this is an even more terrifying and awful way to die.
8. The Dude Whose Face Is Ripping Open
The carving skills almost make me forget about the nightmares I will have for the rest of my life after looking at this guy's face. Also where is his brain and why are his teeth different?!
9. Pinocchio Noses
They're kind of cute until you realize they want to eat your body and use your bones as toothpicks to clean their teeth when they're done.
10. Terrifying Sea Creature Thing With A Tiny Head And OMG Why Are Its Lips Sewn Up Like That?
The name says it all, really.
After all that terror, here's a palate cleanser! Pumpkin carving at its best.