Ryan Lochte Is The Guy Every Girl Should Be Warned About … Says His Mother
I love me some Olympic athletes. I mean, I’m not like at the Samuel L. Jackson level, but there ain’t no shame in my game when it comes to cheering on the awesome red, white and blue.
And yet, the less I know about these physical masterpieces, the better. (Except for Missy Franklin, my fellow Coloradoan — love that girl.)
I thought Ryan Lochte, for instance, was just gorgeous. And then he put that grill in his mouth. Not good. But even that was better than when he opened his mouth and stupidity started falling out. Talk about a buzz kill. I realize that many athletes at that level are so focused on their sport that they don’t have much time for being smart or interesting people, but he takes it to an all new level. Here’s a video of him showing everyone what suffered because of his athletic devotion:
And apparently this gimmick of saying stupid stuff runs in the family. Here’s his own mother yesterday:
“He goes out on one-night stands,” Ike Lochte told Today.com while being interviewed on the set of NBC’s Today show. “He’s not able to give fully to a relationship because he’s always on the go.”
This is the latest in a string of recent comments/hints about the kind of girl and/or relationship Lochte is looking for.
He told ESPN The Magazine that 70 to 75% of athletes in Olympic Village will have sex with other athletes during the Games, and he was looking forward to the partying and hookups. “My last Olympics, I had a girlfriend — big mistake,” Lochte said before the Games started. “Now I’m single, so London should be really good. I’m excited.”
Charming. Hey, Ike. A grateful nation thanks you for teaching your boy to swim and stuff. But there’s much more to life than even gold medals. How about some remedial math, language and the problems with one-night stands in between laps.