Playboy’s 2013 Awesomely Consensual College Party Guide Deemed A Big Fat Fake

Playboy doesn’t have the best track record with women/girls and abuse. Between the magazine citing Lolita as one of top 25 “sexiest novels ever written,” you know, where a little girl gets raped, and Hugh Hefner publicly hoping that his girlfriend-beating son “patch things up” with his lady friend, the “sex positive” branding definitely doesn’t square with ladies’ well-being. But, it would appear that the publication is looking to turn over a new leaf with their “2013 Top Ten Party Commandments.” The tagline? “The ultimate guide to a consensual good time.” Too bad it has been deemed a fake.

The now debunked website lit afire across the Twittersphere for promoting consensual sex as part of undergrad partying. The fake Playboy website says that they release their “ultimate guide” for undergrad partying every year, replete with their “infamous party school list.” Not surprisingly, this leaves them knee deep in rape culture:

Over the years, it has been brought to our attention that some of our long-standing party picks have a not-so-toast-worthy, rape-ridden side to their campus life.

Somewhere in the countless hours we spent tallying up co-eds and scoring beer pong, we lost track of the most essential element of the Playboy lifestyle: sexual pleasure. Rape is kryptonite to sexual pleasure. The two cannot co-exist. For our revised party guide to live up to our founder’s vision, we had to put a new criterion on top. Namely, consent.

In other words”¦ A good college party is all about everyone having a good time. Consent is all about everyone having a good time. Rape is only a good time if you’re a rapist. And fuck those people.

Fuck those people, indeed. This year, the faux Playboy says that they’re not particularly interested with “tallying up party culture,” but rather re-imagining it as rape-free — something that many parents are working tirelessly for as they raise respectful, non-douchebag sons.

According to the fake Playboy, the “Top Ten Party Commandments” were penned by “sexually enlightened” undergraduate students about having safe and consensual sex:

While I was originally inclined to thank Playboy for showing up to the party, the copy is a hoax, according to ThinkProgress:

A Playboy spokesperson acknowledged the website on Tuesday, but said that it is a fake. Sadly, the fact that this is parody shows Playboy remains an organization that has put little, if any, focus on consent.

Our intern Frances Locke tweeted at Playboy responding to the hoax and just got some sexy, sexy spam in return:

We’ll keep you posted on Playboy’s response, assuming it’s not more sexbots.