ADVERTISEMENT

Stuff

I Lie To My Kids About Lots Of Things And You Are Lying If You Say You Don’t Lie

By  | 
ADVERTISEMENT

 I Lie To My Kids About Lots Of Things And You Are Lying If You Say You Don t Lie shutterstock 69942631 1372767422 74 134 205 46 205x200 jpg(ollyy/shutterstock)

After I wrote about lying to my kids about the fireworks (still NOT going) I started thinking about a comment one of you made, which was:

 I Lie To My Kids About Lots Of Things And You Are Lying If You Say You Don t Lie Screen Shot 2013 07 02 at 7 22 37 AM png

And ya’ll know what? I AM an untrustworthy liar, at least when it comes to my kids, because this comment made me realize how often I DO lie to them! I lie to them on an almost daily basis! And I have been doing this for years! And when I tweeted a link to my article, two of my friends replied back to me and I realized I am definitely not the only mama out there doing this.

 I Lie To My Kids About Lots Of Things And You Are Lying If You Say You Don t Lie momlie1 jpg

I have TOTALLY done this too, but now that my kids are older it’s more of me saying something like:

I have NO idea why all of your DVR’d episodes of Adventure Time have vanished from the DVR, maybe it is broken. 

When in reality, I totally deleted that shit because I needed to make sure there was enough room for The Anna Nicole Smith movie on Lifetime. My pants are sooooo on fire.

 I Lie To My Kids About Lots Of Things And You Are Lying If You Say You Don t Lie momlie2 jpg

This doesn’t work so well now that my kids know how to charge electronics, but you better believe that game controllers have been magically “lost” for a day or their batteries taken out when I want them to play outside instead of jumping down cartoon sewer pipes. Sure, sometimes I tell them the truth and explain I want them to get fresh air, but sometimes I have no good reason and I just want them out of my house so I can watch my DVR’d The Anna Nicole Smith movie on Lifetime. Other lies I have told? Oh let me count them…

 Of course HE is real

 I Lie To My Kids About Lots Of Things And You Are Lying If You Say You Don t Lie shutterstock 117241135 280x186 jpg

Pressmaster/shutterstock)

Only my eldest no longer believes, but I have not come clean to my younger ones yet. And when asked, I lie my pants off. I say things like “Oh come on, how would your father and I be able to do all this (and then I gesture like a gameshow hostess to the magical array of presents ) in one night? ” And I change the subject. And give them some cookies.

Same with this guy 

 I Lie To My Kids About Lots Of Things And You Are Lying If You Say You Don t Lie vintage easter bunny costume 155x200 jpg

(awakwardfamilyphotos.com)

And this lady

 I Lie To My Kids About Lots Of Things And You Are Lying If You Say You Don t Lie shutterstock 86406037 166x200 jpg(VMM/shutterstock)

 I have told them I have NO idea where certain items of clothing are 
A pair of shorts that are too short and tight on my daughter? One of my son’s gross oversized, stained, thread-bare T-shirts? I have NO idea where they are. Did you put them in the wash? Did you leave them somewhere? I have NO idea, wear something else. (and yeah, they are totally festering at the bottom of a garbage bag)
 I Lie To My Kids About Lots Of Things And You Are Lying If You Say You Don t Lie nothing to wear gif by flawless slut d4xg27g gif
(deviantart.com)
I have NO idea who ate the last ice cream sandwich 
 I Lie To My Kids About Lots Of Things And You Are Lying If You Say You Don t Lie shutterstock 33429595 280x186 jpg
It was me, while watching The Anna Nicole Smith movie on Lifetime, and it was awesome.
Stop knocking on the door, your father and I are doing taxes 
 I Lie To My Kids About Lots Of Things And You Are Lying If You Say You Don t Lie tumblr lgj2k5eC2r1qeozgro1 r2 500 gif
(tumblr)
Or planning an upcoming birthday. Or discussing your grades. Or talking about wallpaper. My kids don’t have to know why exactly we want to be alone. Sometimes I tell them we need grownup alone romantic time but sure, I have been known to tell them we are in the bedroom with the door locked because we are planning the grocery list.
It’s not like I would lie to my kids about something important and that would cause them damage in the future, but I just don’t feel the need to be open and honest with them about every single thing that goes on at all times. I don’t lie to them to hurt them, sometimes I just do it because it’s easier than going into a lengthy explanation or having my reasoning met with debates. I’m extremely open and honest with my kids, but yeah, I totally lie to them. Even if they are just “little whites” like the fireworks being cancelled they are still technically lies. And if you parents aren’t doing the same thing, then you know what I think.
 I Lie To My Kids About Lots Of Things And You Are Lying If You Say You Don t Lie tumblr ma81ml1Enq1qcg1glo1 500 gif
(tumblr)
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
comments
Share
Pin
Tweet