Need Alone Time? Go To The Bathroom
During the witching hour in my house (6-7 p.m.), I’ll often proclaim to my family: “Mommy’s going to the bathroom now.” It’s really my way of telling them that I’m annoyed and need a five-minute time out from their whining. But both my sons – and hubby, too – actually believe that I need to use the bathroom.
So upstairs I go, armed with my trusty iPhone, into the bathroom. I lock the door and sit on the toilet (seat down – I don’t really have to go). I respond to emails. Play a couple round of Words With Friends. Sometimes I even call my sister to catch up on the day.
Five minutes in and there’s always the inevitable, “Mommeeeeeeee?!” from downstairs. That’s when I shout down, “Five more minutes!” and proceed to check Facebook, shape my eyebrows, examine my pores in the mirror. The bathroom is my refuge. It’s cramped and humid and not the most comfortable but, hey, it has a lock on the door and it always gives off the illusion I’m attending to more important business.
I’ll never forget one friend telling me how she locked herself in the bathroom when her 4-year-old daughter was on hour two of a major meltdown. The little girl was safe – she wasn’t going to injure herself – but she was driving my friend nuts. And so into the bathroom she went as her daughter pounded on the door. “I had one of those rare moments where I thought I was going to hurt my child,” my friend revealed (for the record, she has never hurt her child). “So I headed to bathroom to collect myself. It was the smartest move ever.”
I shared this story with my mom, who admitted that she did the same thing when I was a little girl. (Fortunately, I have zero memory of this.) She says it’s actually a responsible thing to do, and I agree. When you’ve reached your limit as a mom, fake stomach cramps and hide out in the bathroom. Your family will never know…