Childrearing

Mommyish’s Rebecca Eckler & Lindsay Cross Talk Parents-Only Vacations On ‘Good Morning America’

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Rebecca EcklerEver the one to incite controversy, Mommyish contributor Rebecca Eckler raised more than a couple eyebrows when she proudly proclaimed that  she was taking a vacation – and leaving her 10-week-old son behind with his grandmother. Even though the idea might be surprising to some, Rebecca stood by her decision pointing out that a child so small is not going to remember the absence or miss anyone for a couple days. What’s more than that, after a long pregnancy, moms are entitled to a little “me time.”

Good Morning America jumped in to the debate, speaking with Rebecca and fellow contributor Lindsay Cross about being away from your child at such a young age. Rebecca explained her position, reiterating, “I think a happy mom makes a happy child and you know your child better than anyone else. Everybody’s going to have an opinion about something including this.”

Lindsay stands in the other camp. While she doesn’t see anything wrong with other moms taking parents-only vacations, she explained, “When my daughter was young, spending a night away would have been more stressful than relaxing.”

OB-GYN Jennifer Ashton weighed in on the controversy but reiterated that we need to be wary of mommy-shaming, “I think that we need to separate with this issue opinion and judgment. My opinion, I wouldn’t leave my baby for a non-work-related luxury vacation. Judgment, I don’t pass judgment on any mother, they’re doing the best they can.”

One vocal supporter of Rebecca’s post was Real Housewives of New York star Jill Zarin. She pointed out, “It’s a little bit hypocritical, if a husband had to go away on work after 10 weeks, you wouldn’t even be discussing it. It would be okay.” What’s more, Zarin pointed out that the need to defend decisions like this can come from the serious pressure put on mothers. “This helicopter parenting has got to stop! The baby’s going to be fine,” she reminds us.

And judging from the looks of things, Rebecca and that seriously adorable little boy of her’s are definitely just fine.

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21 Comments

  1. Sue

    August 23, 2012 at 12:21 pm

    It’s not helicopter parenting. It’s PARENTING. Parent-only vacations are fine. But 10 weeks? That’s too young.

    • Ipsedixit

      August 23, 2012 at 12:55 pm

      Says who? The only people who get a say are the parents. If you wouldn’t call CPS over it, then it’s none of your business.

  2. Tinyfaeri

    August 23, 2012 at 12:21 pm

    Really I don’t think the controversy was that she took a vacation without her baby so much as it was that she was the one to write the blog, and a lot of folks find her insufferable. If someone else had written the same post, or a similar one, I’m not sure it would have gotten the same reaction. Really, there were very few comments that took her to task for taking the vacation – most of them supported new moms taking a vacation, or were just anti-Eckler.

  3. Llisa10138

    August 23, 2012 at 5:24 pm

    It is amazing why america would have an opinion on two responsible adults decision to go on vacation and leaving her child with his/her grandmother. Everyone get a life and let’s focus on more important things. Anyone who has children would agree after 2 months of sleepless nights so “adult time” is desired. My one wish would be that I could have done the same. Girl have fun!

    • Michelle

      August 23, 2012 at 10:58 pm

      But she doesn’t have sleepless nights….that’s what she has a night nurse for.

    • Julie

      August 24, 2012 at 1:53 am

      I was thinking the same thing.

  4. Pickles

    August 23, 2012 at 6:05 pm

    To be honest the baby was left with the grandparents as I was 38 years ago when I was 6 months old. Now everyone is attacking the mom, why just her? If you people are going to attack the parenting of the mom be sure you attack the dad too. From my grandmother’s stand point she saw nothing wrong with my parents (who at the time were in their very early 30’s) taking their vacation. She said I was just fine. I was not being nursed, I was out of the hospital (I was sickly when I was born). I am a VERY independent woman! MOst of my adult life I have been over 1500 miles away from my parents. I don’t need to sit up their asses like a lot of people do. I have friends who didn’t move away from their parents until their 40’s because they were affraid to leave them. REALLY? Is that the type of parents we want in the world> Ones who coddle their child every moment? Get over yourselves people and jealously of this woman. Just leave her be already!!!!

    • Julie

      August 24, 2012 at 1:54 am

      It’s not jealousy. People just don’t like her.

  5. Bea

    August 23, 2012 at 8:11 pm

    There ought to be a law….
    People should have to take child development classes before they’re allowed to have children, or else submit to sterilization.
    Yeah, like it or not, a baby needs to be near its mother on a daily basis for a certain period of time, not based on “a mother knows her child” but based on scientific and psychological understanding of how the psyche develops its sense of safety and security in the world.
    Having children without understanding their stages of development and when certain things are appropriate is irresponsible and damaging.
    Why do you think so many people are taking prescription sleep aids, illegal drugs, alcohol, or turning to crime, or spending years in therapy? They’ve been raised by stupid, blind, ignorant, hateful parents who COULD know better and do better than their own parents did but are too selfish to spend the time to learn how.

    • Sara

      August 23, 2012 at 8:56 pm

      Huh. I’m adopted, so I wasn’t near my mother at all after birth, and then I was adopted at three and a half months old. Prior to that, I was in foster care; after three and a half months, I was raised by my wonderful, loving parents. I’m not on sleep aids, illegal drugs, alcohol, engaging in crime or going to therapy. If a lack of daily contact with mother was truly the detriment that you claim, how would you explain all of the happy, well-adjusted adopted and foster children out there?
      I’m no fan of Rebecca Eckler’s, but your comments are ignorant and self-righteous in the extreme. Your way of doing things may be ideal for you, but to assume that any other way is wanton child abuse is short-sighted and wrong.

    • Julie

      August 24, 2012 at 2:03 am

      I’m sorry but you are an asshole, This, combined with your other comments on this subject that I’ve read are ignorant and cruel. ”
      People should have to take child development classes before they’re allowed to have children, or else submit to sterilization.” STERILIZATION!?!? You’ve GOT to be kidding me. I wish I could hit the dislike button more than once, because I would. Talk about infringement on basic human rights. Ban all the vaginas! The women who own them are stupid, blind, ignorant and hateful! Hmm, sounds more like you’re talking about yourself there, Bea. You try to sound so all-knowing about the child psyche and development but really, you should do some reading up on that. I was FORCED to spend time away from my child for the first 4 weeks of her life because she was in the NICU. Now that she’s home, she’s completely well adjusted and is one of the happiest babies I’ve ever seen. I’m sorry your mom was such a jerk and you had a bad childhood and separation issues into adulthood. But that doesn’t mean you know everything and not everything that applies to you, applies to everyone else.

  6. edna

    August 23, 2012 at 10:54 pm

    I worked with Rebecca at the National Post. She is an attention whore.

    • DMH

      August 25, 2012 at 2:58 pm

      You don’t say?? Who would’ve thought…. lol

  7. Julie

    August 23, 2012 at 11:02 pm

    Happy mom happy baby is often simply an excuse for selfish behavior. Babies that young need their mommy. Babies that age don’t give a hoot if their mommy is happy. They just need bonding and love and nurturing from her. You can go to Mexico anytime, your baby is only teeny once. I would never have left my kids that young. As soon as I heard the mommy blogger headline I knew it had to be Rebecca Eckler. She loves to create drama. She’s horrid.

    • Julie

      August 24, 2012 at 1:57 am

      Your first sentence is absurd. Some moms get so depressed they can’t function and that means they can’t care for their child. I’m pretty sure a baby can tell when they aren’t getting fed. Moms NEED to take care of themselves. And if a little pampering is what it takes, then they should do it. Worry about your own family.

    • Tinyfaeri

      August 24, 2012 at 10:14 am

      “Worry about your own family.” If more people did that, the world would be a happier place.

  8. Katie

    August 23, 2012 at 11:04 pm

    Very few people had a problem with Rebecca Eckler taking a holiday, they just have a problem with Rebecca Eckler in general…

    • DMH

      August 25, 2012 at 3:00 pm

      Like the fact that she’s a complete hypocritical cunt mixed with a good shot of bitch?

    • MargieStar

      August 25, 2012 at 6:54 pm

      That and the whole
      “I am prettier than other mothers because my hair is long”
      “My son’s penis is scary”
      “My daughter’s friend has horrible parents because they only gave her $20 for the day so I bought her hundreds of dollars of clothes to make up for it and they should pay me back”
      “My daughter googled me and found nudie pictures”
      “The only time I am going to comment on a post is to swear”
      “My husband is the coach so I should get special treatment”
      “I want to yell at the complete stranger who is trying to breastfeed “YOU DON’T HAVE TO DO THAT! THEY HAVE FORUMLA” without knowing anything about her or her situation”
      “Marriage is so 2006”
      “My relationship would die if we had to care for our own child”
      “My OB is pregnant too, waa waa waa”
      “The school is having functions and I don’t want to go”
      “My daughter’s friend’s mother has different expectations of her than I do of my daughter and this is wrong and bad”
      “My doctor gave me medical advice, therefore hates me”
      “My babydaddy should live next door to me”
      “My daughter found my vibrator, time to write an article about it”
      “I can’t clean up my child’s vomit”
      “I don’t want to go to my daughter’s concert”
      “I wanted to be friends with this lady but my daughter doesn’t like her daughter and now my daughter has ruined my social life”
      “My boyfriend’s ex wife doesn’t like me” (she probably read your articles)
      “I do my daughter’s homework so it can be up to my standard”

      And so on…

  9. Sara

    August 24, 2012 at 7:13 am

    I kinda think it’s hilarious that the one article that was picked up on by GMA for being “controversial”, that she had to “stand by” her decision to go on vacation without her newborn, is actually the one that got the biggest “Ummmmm…..okay?” reaction from readers.
    As others have pointed out, most people actually don’t think it’s that big a deal–maybe not the way each of us would have done it, but not the big, controversial, earth-shattering proclamation that Eckler seems to think it is. Readers have more of a problem with her attitude in general, as illustrated through most of her other articles, and poor writing style (which wouldn’t be such a big deal if she were an amateur blogger, but since she is apparently a professional, published author, I think most readers would hold her to a higher standard…..such as actually being a competent writer.)

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