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Anonymous Mom: I Used To Have A Serious Career, Now I Show Off On Pinterest

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I have never been very good at being a girl.

I don’t get my hair done. I don’t wear makeup. I definitely can’t put together a stylish outfit. I don’t even drink wine. So it’s kind of a shock to me that I have found myself on Pinterest lately looking at all of the beautiful porches, decorations, nurseries, crafts, sensory tables, and other things I know I could never create (unless I shamelessly copied every detail from the picture). I find myself relating to the women who talk about their plans for a thrift store search to find that cute, distressed, window to turn into a picture frame.

I want to be that mom on Facebook who posts the perfectly staged portraits of my 5-month-old twins wearing their handmade tutus and ridiculously large bows half the size of their head, posed so it looks like all they do is hold hands…in a meadow…with a beam of sunshine. They would of course not be crying or drooling or any of the other gross things they do on a daily basis. Next would be the picture of my artfully arranged fall porch with the adorable wood pumpkin that says, “Happy Fall, ya’ll!”.

I’ve tried to understand why I want to create these things and decorate my house in this way when I never have before. It’s not who I am. I am the science nerd. I read fantasy books. I got good grades and worked hard at my job. I was the teacher who stayed until 7 pm to finish planning that awesome lesson involving the latest technology I read about in a blog over the weekend. I pushed myself to be one of the best; a teacher the parents wanted for their child and one who other teachers respected. I wanted to be the person my colleagues would come to if they wanted advice on how to incorporate new strategies into their teaching. In other words, I wanted to excel.

Then I had twins. This, in my area, meant I could not afford daycare on a teachers’ salary. So I am a stay at home mom now. I spend all day, every day talking at two babies who look at me with their adorable smiles, not comprehending a single word I say. I love my daughters and I love the time I get to spend with them. I know how fortunate I am to be able to spend that time with them. But let’s face it — it’s not hard to excel at taking care of babies. You give them a toy they can chew on and it’s the best moment of their lives. Getting through the monotonous day, trying not to let the crying sear into your soul is hard. But the actual tasks involved are not difficult.

So I miss having something in which I have to work at to excel. This is where the Pinterest perfect mom in me emerges. That stylish and trendy girl I never expected to want to be says if I can turn my living room into something magazine-cover-worthy, I have shown that I excel at being a stay at home mom. If I create mouthwatering, impeccably decorated cupcakes, it shows I’m at the top of my game. Do I realize how vain this is? Yes, of course. But I accept that I like to be the best at things and that is not something I can (or want to) change. What I can change are the things I consider to be evidence of being the best mom.

Instead of wanting to paint perfect chevron walls in the nursery, I can be proud of the fact there are clean sheets on the cribs. I don’t need a chalkboard hung on the wall elegantly framed with 100 year old wood and a cascade of Spanish moss down the side — have my multicolored pack of sticky notes. My girls can play in the dirt and get all the sensory experience they want! It’s a completely different mindset and one that I need to embrace.

Right after I pin this one last thing

(photo: Agnes Kantaruk/ Shutterstock)

36 Comments

  1. Zettai

    September 12, 2014 at 1:29 pm

    I liked this article, but the title doesn’t connect to the content because the author isn’t a Pinterest mom, she just wants to be. I think everyone has a part of them that wants to be THAT mom.

    • Iwill Findu

      September 12, 2014 at 2:19 pm

      I love crafts and crafting, but I hate everything about pinterest. I refuse to have an account being I would always feel like the kickass things I make for myself or my daughter wouldn’t be enough because there’s some new pin or what ever. I mean if people were really doing/attempting everything they were pinning they would never have time to eat/sleep/use the bathroom.

    • NotTakenNotAvailable

      September 12, 2014 at 2:49 pm

      I’m such a contrarian that I’d probably make an account just to post pictures of places I peed that didn’t have toilets. I can be kind of a dick, even if I don’t have one.

    • Elizabeth Licata

      September 16, 2014 at 12:19 pm

      Dude, that sounds like a book deal waiting to happen to me.

    • Jenny1Tech

      September 13, 2014 at 2:32 am

      Discover the Best Sellers in Baby
      http://smarturl.it/BestForBaby2

  2. alexesq33

    September 12, 2014 at 1:29 pm

    Please….step away from the chevron 🙂

    • Foreskin Magpie

      September 12, 2014 at 2:31 pm

      Seriously, chevron can go DIAF any day now.

    • Bleu Cheese Bewbs

      September 12, 2014 at 4:28 pm

      QUIT HATING ON CHEVRON

    • Foreskin Magpie

      September 14, 2014 at 7:39 pm

      NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    • Linzon

      September 12, 2014 at 3:22 pm

      I hope dinosaurs are the next big decorating thing because dinosaurs.

      Ombré forever, though.

    • Jem

      September 14, 2014 at 8:33 pm

      I’m glad I’m not the only one who does not understand the appeal of chevron.

    • WhoremonalCrazyLotusSlugalo

      September 15, 2014 at 7:51 am

      Thank you. Thank you so much for saying this out loud –figuratively. Every time I see “chevron”, it’s like someone is taking frozen ice picks and slowly driving them into my eyeballs.

  3. LadyClodia the Modest Rat

    September 12, 2014 at 1:30 pm

    Mine are “right after I make this one last comment,” or “right after I reblog this one last post.” I was like that before I had kids too, and I’ve always enjoyed stuff like that. It’s OK to indulge in crafting our fantasies online; it’s an escape, and we can all use that sometimes.

    http://i.imgur.com/547NI3q.gif

    • NotTakenNotAvailable

      September 12, 2014 at 2:46 pm

      I pretty much say the same thing every time I need to write or proofread something. If I didn’t need the internet to do my job, I’d disable it in the name of increased productivity.

    • Linzon

      September 12, 2014 at 3:23 pm

      To keep me on track I have a browser extension that blocks access to select sites after a predetermined amount of time, the only problem being I can just disable the extension if I get really annoyed with it.

    • NotTakenNotAvailable

      September 12, 2014 at 4:26 pm

      In addition to being able to turn off the extension, I also have my iPhone close at hand constantly for when my computer’s taking a while to upload or download a file and I don’t want to interrupt it by dicking around on the internet on that particular medium. :p

    • LiteBrite(UterineDudebro)

      September 12, 2014 at 2:47 pm

      I’m “escaping” by picturing myself dancing with all three of these guys and having each one fight over who gets to take me to dinner.

      ETA: I’m mesmerized by this .gif.

    • LadyClodia the Modest Rat

      September 12, 2014 at 3:03 pm

      There’s another one too. I had a hard time choosing which one to use.

      http://i.imgur.com/xp7jln9.gif

    • WhoremonalCrazyLotusSlugalo

      September 15, 2014 at 7:49 am

      ✨*ahhhhh*✨

  4. Holly

    September 12, 2014 at 2:11 pm

    The title doesn’t fit with the article. Also, you are doing just fine at “being a girl”. I used to say “I’m not very girly”. Until I thought about what I was saying. Being a scientist, an outdoorsy person and a great soccer player are girly. And I kick ass at being girly!

  5. NotTakenNotAvailable

    September 12, 2014 at 2:19 pm

    My grandmother thinks I suck at being a girl, too. I’ll bring over some beer, and we can commiserate, though I must confess that I’ve never really gotten Pinterest (unless I can use it to pin pictures of fourteeners that have nearly contributed to my death–is that a thing there?).

    • js argh

      September 12, 2014 at 9:21 pm

      If I had a dollar for every time my grandma and mom have told me I need to wear more makeup and skirts, I could pay someone else to make Pinterest crafts for me.

    • NotTakenNotAvailableWTFDisqus

      September 12, 2014 at 11:13 pm

      Luckily the thickness of my glasses seems to have kept my grandma from noticing how un-made-up my face looks, but dresses (and skirts,I would assume) will apparently solve all my problems in life. At least they’ll help me go out on dates, which will really solve all my problems in life. Sigh.

    • WhoremonalCrazyLotusSlugalo

      September 15, 2014 at 7:46 am

      I think you’re great at being you, though!

  6. Ursi

    September 12, 2014 at 2:19 pm

    Can I suggest knitting or crochet for people who aren’t particularly creative but want to be able to show off their handiwork? You do not need to be a visionary to do it well. Some knitters are very creative but anyone who can follow a pattern can do it. You will produce useful items and once you learn to knit a beanie your kids will be in cute hats for eternity. Plus, when you get proficient at it you’ll be able to do it on autopilot.

    • jane

      September 12, 2014 at 2:24 pm

      Yes yes yes! I have knit so many baby blankets I can’t even tell you. But something other than a square or rectangle? No thanks.

    • bender

      September 12, 2014 at 3:43 pm

      I agree, and I would add sewing to that (although the equipment for that hobby can get kind of pricey). I am not particularly creative, but I can follow a pattern like nobody’s business. Consequently, my friends and family think I am extremely talented and creative!

    • Elizabeth

      September 12, 2014 at 3:46 pm

      Crocheting is great, and it’s not too difficult to pick up! Believe me, I’m TERRIBLE at crafts and I can’t even knit, but I picked up crocheting from a day’s worth of youtube videos.

    • js argh

      September 12, 2014 at 9:19 pm

      I’m taking a break from knitting my husband’s new winter accessories to read comments. Wee! I fully endorse the knitting recommendation. And there are SOOOO many free tutorials on YouTube.

    • EmmaFromÉire

      September 13, 2014 at 10:35 am

      Also, cross stitch. So easy, great results.

    • Linzon

      September 13, 2014 at 12:39 pm

      I can’t sew or knit to save my life but I can stitch a mean snarky sampler.

  7. guest

    September 12, 2014 at 2:21 pm

    Pinterest is fun. Enjoy it and don’t worry if you’re kicking ass at doing things like crafts but also don’t worry if you can’t always keep up with it. It shouldn’t be a chore..stuff like that is suppose to be fun 🙂

  8. AP

    September 12, 2014 at 4:22 pm

    I actually think it’s OK to be a Pintrest Mom, as long as you’re doing those crafts because you (and your kid) truly enjoy them, and you’re not doing them to look superior to others.

    I know lots of people who are creative, yet have no outlet for their creativtiy, and instead just find excuses in their everyday life to be creative. That’s totally fine with me. It’s the braggy superiority complex that I take issue with.

  9. js argh

    September 12, 2014 at 9:18 pm

    It’s cool, Spanish moss tends to be full of spiders and ticks and gross things anyway.

    I use Pinterest for the knitting patterns. <3

  10. hdonovan

    September 15, 2014 at 1:15 am

    Should you ever desire to become crafty I’m betting a science nerd mom could create a coolly gruesome mad scientist lab to decorate for Halloween. (And an added bonus is that test tubes function well as “adult beverage” containers while still looking like decorations.:)

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