Mom Gives Birth to 11-Pound Baby Without an Epidural, Vaginas Worldwide Shriek

(Facebook / Laura Fifield Photography)

A woman who gave birth at home without an epidural has officially achieved “iron vagina” status with the birth of her third child. After laboring at home, mom Natalie Bancroft welcomed son Simon, who weighed in at a whopping ELEVEN POUNDS, TWO OUNCES. ”We knew the baby would be big, closer to 9.5 lbs., but we never thought he would be 11 lbs.!” mama Bancroft told People Magazine.  Excuse me while I pick my jaw up off the floor.

Bancroft, a trained doula, created a calm setting for the birth of her third child. Her birth photographer, Laura Fifield, wrote on her blog, “When I arrived she was standing near the birth pool, laboring in a candle-lit room. Soft music was playing along with essential oils diffusing. Her birth space was serene and comforting.” According to Fifield, Bancroft labored throughout her house, moving her body into different positions.

11 pound baby on birthing ball
via Facebook / Laura Fifield Photography

The labor took about four hours. ”I knew my body was doing what it needed to do,” said Bancroft. “The transition was quick, and my body pushed on its own.” Bancroft delivered in a birthing pool and HOLY SHIT LOOK THERE’S THE HEAD.

I see a head! I see a head!
via Facebook /  Laura Fifield Photography

She’s superwoman.

After Bancroft nursed and cuddled her new bundle, it was time for the weigh in. “We could tell he was a little chunker!” exclaimed Fifield, although she really had NO idea just how chunky. When the midwife announced his weight at 11lbs, 2oz, they were all shocked.

I'm sorry, he's HOW big?
via Facebook / Laura Fifield Photography

Her face is like, “I’m sorry, he weighs what?”

Bancroft told People Magazine that Simon was six days past his due date, and that she tested negative for gestational diabetes. Online commenters aren’t the only ones expressing shock at the size of Simon. ”I’M impressed I had an 11-lb. baby!” said Bancroft. ”But seriously, it shows that women’s bodies are incredible and can do such amazing things. I am not the first, nor will I be the last, to give birth to an almost-toddler.”

Godspeed to the vagina of the next toddler-birther.

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