Childrearing

Parents Roll Their Eyes At Mom Who Charged Fellow Mom Money For BDay Party Cancellation

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cakepopsKindly direct your attention to a hopefully not emerging trend in children’s birthday etiquette. Forget about writing out thank you cards, committing to goody bags, or debating whether or not to open presents in front of guests. The new question is what to do about those last minute guest cancellations. According to one mom on the interwebs, you should charge.

A woman on CafeMom, identified only as justins_momm292, alleges that she was asked to pay cash money because her kid got sick and couldn’t attend:

My daughter was invited to a 6-year-old’s birthday party at local baseball game.. We were asked to RSVP by a certain date, which I did. On the day of the party, my daughter got sick, so I called the mother to let her know that my daughter would not be coming. The mother said, “OK, just give me $15 for her ticket tomorrow.” The tickets were part of a birthday package, which I would not have had to pay for if she were attending.

Also, I checked with the box office and the mother is charging me $5 more than the face value of the ticket! How should I handle this?

Granted, tickets will get you to an entirely different page in your etiquette handbook. But an extra five dollars? For what? A mother’s handling fees?

CafeMom’s readers have essentially given a collective HELL NO, with further mommy advice:

I’d tell her no way in hell. Thats not how it works. It’s your risk when you invite people to a birthday party and it’s not your fault your kid got sick. Hell, even if you had simply had something else come up or changed your mind, it’s still her risk having the party somewhere besides her own home. I’d offer the gift I assume you had already purchased but I would pretend she didnt say anything about the cost of the ticket; if shes crass enough to bring it up, smile politely and say, Im sorry, I dont feel it’s appropriate to ask me to reimburse you for something that was your expense to begin with. Her gift cost ‘x’ amount, that covers the cost of the ‘lost’ ticket.
PLUS overcharging you?! I dont think so. You dont pay to go to a birthday party and if thats how shes looking at it, I’d also add that she please make sure not to invite your daughter to anything else again.

Other comments leave it at “tacky,” “very rude,” even “trashy,” and many other choice phrases:

I’d tell the mother she is trashy as f***. End of story.

I really hope you laughed at her.

I would give the the money that the box office charged as the daughter’s gift .. YES SORRY I’M  A BiTCH for that..

Dont pay that B*tch a damn dime. Besides what kind of a person charges kids for coming their childs party. The kids not queen of freakin England. Your not legally obligated to give her anything.

That is so incredibly rude.  Tell her to shove it.

But there was one empathizer of note:

I’m on the fence about this.  I mean, it’s not a lot of money, so she should be able to cover that ticket cost herself.  That being said, this isn’t just a package deal to a restaurant or something.  It’s a baseball game, meaning that she has reserved actual seats (which is why you had to RSVP by a certain date).  So even though, yes, sickness is unpredictable, there is now a seat that has been reserved and paid for that is now empty.  I would just give her the money – it’s only $15.

But apparently it’s not “only $15” to some.

(photo: Agnes Kantaruk / Shutterstock)