Mom Blogger Wants Mom Bloggers To Stop Writing About Mom Blog Stuff

mommy-wars-memeI’m going to make a statement that’s not going to be very popular with some, but here goes: there are no original ideas in Mom Blogging. Sorry. It’s true. I don’t mean to burst the bubble of those who think they invented the wheel — wait, never mind. Yes I do.

Today I read a post on Mamapedia in which a mom blogger described all of the things she’s sick of seeing on mom blogs. In a nutshell she says she’s already written about all of these topics so everyone should just stop now, mkay? Here’s how it starts:

I am the first to admit that I’m now considered a village elder as far as motherhood is concerned. Been there, done that, drank the vodka, if you know what I mean. Like I always remind my darling 14 year old William (the last of my four kids): ”Dude, don’t even try to shock me anymore. I have seen it all.”

 

She’s been through the early stages of parenting and she doesn’t want to hear about it anymore. Just stop, moms. Seriously. You’re annoying this woman. Here are the five things she would like the parental blogosphere to stop covering immediately:

“1. Earnest, vaguely hipsterish Stay At Home Dads reminding us of how awesome they are.”

“Yes, they’re great. But so are the dads who are out working their asses off to provide for their families. Hell, in my humble opinion, just being a contributing father, whether you provide income or care or both, makes you a great dad.”

Did you hear that dads! Why bother turning gender stereotypes on their asses and contributing to discussions about parenting in a very real way? This woman is sick of it. Just stop.

“2. Bitching about not being able to use the bathroom in peace.”

“I kind of understand this one, up to a point. I was in that boat for a long time, where showers were done furtively and quickly, with constant peeks out of the shower curtain to make sure the baby in the car seat hadn’t choked or fallen out. And I have experience in sitting on the toilet, doing my business, while breastfeeding (who knew that learning how to wipe with a baby on my lap would be great training for Future Me and my lovely panniculus? Google it, I can’t be bothered to provide an explanation right now. Three c-sections, bitches!)”

Uh, you just told an anecdote about how hard it is to pee alone, whilst complaining about moms talking about how hard it is to pee alone. Impressive.

“3. Vagina talk, and the endless euphemisms for the word ‘vagina’.”

“Yes, I know”¦I wrote an award-winning (LOL) post about this subject. But that was two years ago and it was already getting old (the subject, and also my vagina”¦ba dum BUM).”

Haha – WUT? Vaginas are hilarious. We’re not going to stop writing about them. No way, no how.

“4. The Mother Effing Mommy Wars.” 

“I don’t know when this crap started, and who knows when it will end. But maybe, just maybe, if we stop being such bitches to each other, it will ease up a bit.”

Um…

“5. All of the Woe is (Mom)Me blathering.”

“”Parenting is hard!’ “This isn’t what I thought it would be!” ”Some days I don’t like my kids!” Guess what? This is a song as old as time, my friends. Ever since the first Cave Mom watched her husband walk out at the break of dawn to join in on the mammoth hunt, looked down at her screaming Cave Baby and thought ”This not what me envisioned for self”, people have been discovering just how hard parenting is. But I think the point has been made. Over and over. And over again.”

I’ll be serious about this one, because this is a subject I feel strongly about: parenting is fucking hard and a lot of us fall into pits of despair when we realize that. We need each other talking about this more than anything, I think.

I like this writer. She’s funny. Her posts are funny, and when she wrote them there were probably a ton of women who related to them and felt some relief by being able to connect with them. But this sentiment is similar to the one the 40-something who no longer loves the bar (aka me) utters: been there, done that. It doesn’t mean bars are essentially un-fun anymore, it just means I may have aged out of them. And I’m in no way implying this woman has aged-out of anything in any real sense of aging, I’m sure I’m probably older than her. I’m saying what is no longer interesting to you is probably really interesting to the new mother going through it for the first time. It’s why these topics are recycled time and time again.

It’s why there’s nothing new in mommy blogging – except the audience. And I know that I was happy as hell to read about these topics for the first time. Expecting things to fade away because you are no longer interested in them isn’t really how it works. I may even argue it’s the most tired and done opinion of them all.

(photo: Robles Designery/ Shutterstock)

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