Stuff

Kids Accidentally Get Their Dad High, He Spends the Whole Time Yelling at the Cat

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The rules of car ownership clearly state that if your kids leave snacks in your car, you are allowed to eat as many of them as you want to, no questions asked. But one Omaha father should maybe have asked a few questions before chowing down on the brownies he found in his car this week, because it turns out they were spiked with marijuana and he got super high and spent the whole night crawling around the living room and calling the family cat bad names.

According to The Omaha World Herald, the father had loaned his car to his adult children earlier that day. When he got it back, there were brownies in the back seat. Score! Free brownies. The 53-year-old father immediately ate four of them.

Not long after that, the father began experiencing some kind of anxiety. His wife, who seems to have suspected something was up, called the kids to ask them what was in the brownies, but she couldn’t get through to them. She wound up calling the police for assistance, and paramedics said her husband’s vital signs were normal, even though at that point he was crawling around on the floor and calling the family cat a bitch in front of everybody.

At that point, one of the couple’s sons came by and told the police that the brownies belonged to his siblings. He also said he was “pretty sure it was just marijuana in the brownies.”

OK, parents of the world, let’s have a show of hands: Who thinks they were that son’s brownies? He shows up at the house after getting panicked calls about brownies from his mom, knows it was “just” marijuana in the brownies, and he tries to pin it on his siblings who aren’t there to defend themselves?

This sounds like the grown-up version of the frosting-covered toddler saying Aunt Sharon ate all the cupcakes, when Aunt Sharon lives in Virginia.

After crawling around the floor, saying mean things to the cat, and telling police and paramedics that he was “trippin’,” the father went to bed. The police and paramedics just said to call if the situation got worse, but it was probably fine. Then they left.

$20 says mom ate one of the brownies.