We have talked a lot about Halloween lately here at the Mommyish offices and while most of our costume posts have been somewhat positive, I just had to be the one to point all of the Awful the internet has to offer when it comes to horrible Halloween costumes for kids. For every adorable (if overdone) Elsa and for every precious (if expensive) hand-made costume there is another that is better kept off the streets when it's time to trick-or-treat. Gird your loins and have some brain bleach at the ready because you will never forget these Halloween costume fails:
1. Gotta Keep Baby Off The Pole!
Whether she's getting some practice at her mother's chosen profession or the object of a joke that is beyond poor taste, I just can't even with this Stripper Baby costume. Whoever took this actually deserves a visit from CPS.
2. Because Pan-handling Is Hilarious!
Call me a stick-in-the-mud, but I think making fun of people who pan-handle is pretty much the worst. It's just a great lesson to teach your kids that they should laugh at the sorry souls on the corner begging for change. Ugh, just stop, asshole parents.
3. Someone Hand This Kid A Pineapple Bra
"You hold my tail, Daddy! I've gotta focus on carrying these fake mermaid tits!"
4. Hitler Baby
This requires no further explanation. And also, makes my lunch start to come up. I hate the world sometimes.
5. Creepy Doll-In-A-Box
Any costume where a child looks like they are dying to escape is a big, fat fail.
6. If You Think This Is Funny I Don't Want To Know You
I just don't think GTL is appropriate for the under 10 set. It is barely funny when it's grown adults.
7. It's Never Cool To Label Your Kid "Easy"
I see what the parents were going for here and it's entirely possible that it was an innocent idea but oh God, the looks this kid will get while trolling for candy.
8. Joking About Homelessness Makes You Look Like An Asshole
It's really that simple. Just don't.
9. Kids And Meth Labs Don't Mix
Yes, I know this is funny to look at but the older one is old enough to be asked what he is dressed as for Halloween. And what will he say? A balding high school chemistry teacher?
10. Because Nothing Goes With Jack Like A Pack Of Cigs
This one is probably the least offensive of the offensive but, still- dressing your kid as a pack of cancer sticks is probably never a super great idea.