16 Amazing ‘Golden Girls’ Products Off Etsy That You Need In Your Life Now

golden girls
Image: NBC

Growing up, our parents were pretty lax about what we were allowed to watch on TV. Sure, we watched the usual kid stuff, like Fresh Prince of Bel-Air and Blossom. But we also spent many-a-night cuddled on the couch watching shows like Night Court and NYPD Blue. And don’t even get us started on the daytime soaps! We could probably still tell you all about the Sami/Carrie/Austin drama from Days of Our Lives. However our favorite show, hands down, was The Golden Girls. Now, let’s ignore for a moment how it wasn’t exactly the most age-appropriate show for kids to watch. It wasn’t terrible, but Blanche’s escapades certainly inspired a lot of questions from us. But that show was just perfection, then and now.

We grew up with Dorothy, Rose, Blanche, and Sophia. And Blanche’s sexual activities aside, we learned some really valuable lessons from our favorite Golden Girls! OK, in hindsight, maybe we learned some of the MOST valuable lessons from Blanche. The show was funny, it was relevant, and it showed the value of strong friendships. Also, cheesecake, which is necessary. We love The Golden Girls more now than we did when it was still on the air, and watch reruns as much as we can. We also love adding to our collection of GG merch. We’ve found the best Golden Girls products on Etsy, so you can add to (or start) your very own collection, too.

Etsy is a treasure trove of Golden Girls products. You can’t have a GG squad without a shirt, right?

golden girls
Image: Etsy / ShopIconCo

You and your squad need to look the part, and what better way to do that than with this awesome Golden Girls “Squad Goals” shirt from Etsy shop ShopIconCo? This unisex tee wears like your softest, most worn-in shirt, with your favorite GG on the front. It comes in a bunch of different colors, like mauve, dark heather gray, military green, white, and pink, and sells for $24 plus shipping. The shop recommends sizing down if you’re a woman and are looking for a more fitted tee – so if you normally wear a medium, a small should do the trick.

Shirts not your thing? How about some Golden Girls keychains?

Image: Etsy / TheShoutOutShop

You can never have too many keychains, right? Especially if the keychains look like your favorite Golden Girls characters. These adorable keychains (key fobs?) from TheShoutOutShop are the perfect accessory for your keys, your bag, whatever. They’re handmade and made-to-order, and each keychain measures 3″ x 2″, including the key ring. The keychains are made of vinyl and thread, plus the metal ring. And at $7.50 plus shipping, there’s no reason you couldn’t get the whole gang for yourself! But these would also make cute little gifts for your own Golden Girls. Dibs on Sophia, she’s so feisty and we love her dearly for it.

Turn any party into a Shady Pines party with these adorable Golden Girls photo booth props.

Image: Etsy / CutepaperShop

Get ready to decorate that lanai and party like it’s 1986! These Golden Girls photo booth props from CutepaperShop are the perfect prop for any party. Literally, any party. Birthday party? Do it. Anniversary party? Absolutely. Bridal or baby shower? Obviously. Kids’ birthday party? Weird, but why not! You can buy them in pairs, or as the quartet, and you can even get two of each face if you want. Two faces cost $10, and all four cost $20, plus shipping. Maybe your friend is getting a divorce and you’re throwing her a Congrats on Being Single Again party. That clearly calls for Blanche and Dorothy on a stick.

Get a jump on next Valentine’s Day with these Golden Girls V-Day cards.

Image: Etsy / noncomposcards

“Thank you for being a friend … with benefits!” OK, so maybe that’s not the snappy saying on any of these cards (but maybe it should be?). But you can celebrate Valentine’s Day with your Galentines with these amazing GG cards. Why should our kids have all the fun? These are from Etsy shop Noncomposcards, and we need them immediately. $8 (plus shipping!) gets you 16 mini-cards, each with a different picture and Valentine’s Day message. The one with Blanche on it that says “There’s a fine line between having a good time and being a wanton slut. Let’s toe that line this Valentin’s Day.” is our personal favorite.

Your walls could definitely use a bit more Golden Girls.

Image: Etsy / RisaRocksIt

Listen, you’re a grown-up. You have your own money and can make your own choices. So what’s stopping you from hanging Golden Girls prints on your walls? Nothing, that’s what. These colorful prints are available from Etsy shop RisaRocksIt, and you have a lot of printing and size options. You can get a single print of one character starting as low as $6 for a 5 x 5 print. Or you can get a 10 x 10 group print for $16. Even better, you can get all four individual characters to hang gallery-style, starting at $19 for a set of four in 5 x 5. Each print is square, and while they don’t come framed, you can find some cheap frames on Amazon.

Keep your tampons (or your condoms) in their very own Blanche pouch.

Image: Etsy / Famedazed

OK, so apparently it’s technically a coin purse. But Blanche would absolutely want you to use it for more exciting things than change! Or tampons, for that matter, so you best make it your rubbers purse. This adorable little “coin” purse is made by Etsy shop Famedazed and can be yours for $7.50 plus shipping. It’s handmade and made to order, to the seller suggest ordering in advance since processing time can be as long as four weeks. We don’t care how long we’d have to wait to have this cute little purse, every second is 100% worth it.

Say a prayer to your favorite silver ladies.

Image: Etsy / CrimsonandConjure

Sometimes you just need to pray to the Patron Saint of St. Olaf, you know? Pop culture prayer candles have gotten really popular in the last few years, but these Golden Girls prayer candles might be our favorite. Etsy shop CrimsonandConjure makes these candles in their home studio, and the art is their design. They sell for $14.50 plus shipping for one candle, and there are four to choose from: Dorothy Zbornak, Patron Saint of Substitute Teachers; Sophia Petrillo, Patron Saint of Wisecracks; Rose Nylund, Patron Saint of St. Olaf; and Blanche Devereaux, Patron Saint of Seducing Men.

Write your memoir about life back in the tiny town of St. Olaf with these Golden Girls pencils.

Image: Etsy / MadcapAndCo

What better way to start your, “Picture it: Sicily, 1927” stories than with your very own Golden Girls pencil! You’ll be the talk of the retirement home when you whip one of these bad boys out to fill in your crossword puzzle. Or your kids will abscond with them all to do their homework. One or the other. This set of five pencils from MadcapAndCo on Etsy is just perfection. And for just $5 a set, you can afford to get a few so you always have a GG pencil on hand. The set includes the following pencils: Eat Dirt and Die, Trash!; Picture It: Sicily, 1922; Back in St. Olaf…; Shady Pines, Ma!; and of course, Thank You for Being a Friend.

Bottoms up with these stemless Golden Girls wine glasses.

Image: Etsy / AmourCreationsCo

Clearly, we had to include a set of wine glasses on our list of amazing Golden Girls merch. Sure, the ladies were much more fond of a good cheesecake or a cup of coffee, but we have to imagine they shared quite a few bottles of wine over the years. This set of four stemless wine glasses from AmourCreationsCo would be perfect for your very own Golden Girls viewing party. Or you, Tuesday. Each glass is 15 ounces, and the design is permanent vinyl. You can choose from a variety of colors, and even add your own personalized touch. And at $26 for the set, you can buy two so you’ll always have a spare.

Nothing like repping Shady Pines!

Image: Etsy / MyShirtDreams

We may not want to spend our golden years in a place like Shady Pines, but that doesn’t mean we can’t give a shout-out to our favorite fictional retirement home. Sophia’s constant scheming to get out and stay out of Shady Pines made for some pretty hilarious episodes, but it really didn’t seem so bad, did it? Constant company, forced activities, cheery employees … OK, scratch that, it sounds awful. But at least this cropped sweatshirt from MyShirtDreams is cute! It comes in three colors (peach, military green, and storm) and sells for $39 plus shipping. Wear it and you’ll be able to yell, “Shady Pines, Ma!” all the time.

You’re going to need some coasters to go with those wine glasses.

Image: Etsy / Famedazed

You know, you could probably have an entire Golden Girls-themed house if you really put your mind to it. Wall art, linens, accessories, the whole shebang! But if you want to start small, a set of stemless wine glasses featuring the faces of your favorite Golden Girls, and this set of coasters to keep your table looking sharp. But really, if we owned these, we wouldn’t let people use them. We’d display them like the kitschy treasures they are, and give people those ugly cardboard coasters. Get you a set of these bad boys from Famedazed for $12.50 plus shipping, and start amassing your collection of Golden Girls merch.

You’ll want to travel down the road and back again carrying this Golden Girls tote.

Image: Etsy / AlisonWunderlandAcc

We love us a good tote bag, and this is a GOOD tote bag. Just look at it! It’s got out four favorite ladies, plus lines from the theme song. “Thank you for being a friend! Your heart is true, you’re a pal and a confidant”. Is there a better compliment to give or receive as a friend? We think not. This Golden Girls tote bag from AlisonWunderlandAcc sells for $25 on Etsy, and it’s a pretty decent size at 18 x 18 x 3 with a 12″ handle. It’s fully printed on both sides too, so no need to worry about flipping your bag around so the best side is always showing.

These Sacred Heart Golden Girls prints are amazing.

Image: Etsy / LimitedAdditionPrint

Picture it: your living room, 2019. You’ve most definitely already ordered the Golden Girls prayer candles (and if you haven’t, what are you waiting for?!). So obviously you need some wall art to hang over them so you create your very own Golden Girls shrine … right? Are Golden Girls shrines a thing? They should be a thing. Let’s make them a thing with this amazing set of four prints by LimitedAdditionPrint on Etsy. For just $19.99, you get all four Sacred Heart Golden Girls. As if they weren’t amazing enough, these are printed on pages from a vintage dictionary. Talk about a conversation piece!

We’re obsessed with these Golden Girls enamel pins.

Image: Etsy / DynamiteShirts

You can never have too many enamel pins, when you think about it. You need some for your bag, your clothes, your jackets. It’s nice to have options! It’s even nicer to have a little set that all goes together, like these Golden Girls pins. Wear them one at a time, or all together for some extra girl gang power. Etsy shop DynamiteShirts sells these pins for $9 a piece, or all four for $33. But really, you’re going to want all four. How would you even choose which Golden Girl you wanted to wear on a particular day?! Better to make it easy on yourself and get the set. You make enough tough decision on any given day.

Rose Nylund has a certain charm.

Image: Etsy / ShirtAntics

You always knew a doozy of a story was coming when Rose started off a sentence with, “Well, back in St. Olaf…”. Her stories of her hometown drove everyone crazy, but they were always sweet and ended with … some kind of lesson. The only thing better than Rose’s St. Olaf stories was when she used her unique native language. Her phrases, slang, and names for things never failed to crack us up. So this t-shirt from ShirtAntics is the perfect way to pay homage to our favorite St. Olafian. “Blow it out your tubenburbles” is about as close to a swear word as we’re going to get from Rose Nylund, but we’ll take it!

We’ve saved the best Golden Girls product for last.

Image: Etsy / CrescentCityCouture

This is just an absolutely perfect bag for any Golden Girls fan. It’s cute. It’s functional. Quite stylish! And of course, it’s covered in the faces of our favorite Florida seniors. We would absolutely, hands down, make this our daily. We would carry it everywhere. Maybe put a few Golden Girls pins on it, for some extra pizzazz! The canvas messenger bag is from CrescentCityCouture on Etsy, and at $85, it’s the most expensive item on our list. But that bag is worth every penny and you know it.

So there you have it – 16 of the best Golden Girls products on Etsy, perfect for the casual fan. Or, you know, fans like us.

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