Here’s Proof That The Elf On The Shelf Is Actually A Terrifying Little Bastard

The Elf on the Shelf is creepy as hell — I think we can all agree on that, right? He comes into your home every holiday season to “watch” your child and report back to Santa nightly. I would have hated this thing as a kid. And his eyes! His evil little eyes. This thing was spawned from Satan himself.

Which is why I’m pretty surprised an Elf on the Shelf horror movie hasn’t been made yet. What are you waiting for, Hollywood? This little bastard is the perfect horror star.

Since Hollywood is clearly sleeping on this giant money-maker, I had to resort to assigning some of the most horrifying quotes from scary movies throughout time to the little red devil. It’s crazy how well it works.

1. Silence of the Lambs, 1991.

2. Hellraiser, 1987.

3. The Shining, 1980.

4. The Invisible Man, 1933.

5. The Mummy, 1932.

6. Psycho, 1960.

7. A Nightmare On Elm Street, 1984.

8. The Shining, 1980.

9. Dawn of the Dead, 1978.

10. The Devil’s Rejects, 2005.

I was already on the fence about this little thing — now I’m convinced. It was meant for evil.