mom fun

The Compliments We Give Babies Would Humiliate Adults

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4. “Those cheeks! THOSE CHEEKS! I want to squeeze them.”

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I’m sure a lot of people noticed the stunning pudginess of my cheeks at the end of my pregnancy when I was swelling faster than a water balloon on a garden hose, but thankfully none of them said it. Because I would have murdered them.

5. “Aw, look! She has back / ear / face hair.”

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My first child had a very hairy back when she was born, and it was totally hilarious and we talked about it all the time. My husband noticed a single dark hair on my upper lip one day and he will never do it again.

6. “You have the chubbiest little hands and feet!”

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You should definitely coo this at your teenager in front of all of their friends. It will go well. Trust me.

7. “Aw, your little butt is so wrinkly!”

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Add this one to the list of things that will¬†not go well when said in the bedroom. Or outside of it, really. Or anywhere. Let’s just never go there, okay?

(Photo: Shutterstock)

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