Having a toddler can be challenging. Doing more than merely having--feeding, dressing, cleaning--can feel nigh-impossible. But when your toddler's toddler-ness is getting you down, you can take some small comfort in remembering that at least you don't have to parent any of these maniacal Disney characters, who seem far more frustrating to be around than any small child could ever be.
1. Donald Duck
Toddlers fly into a rage over such disasters as: their cookie falling on the floor, their cookie having too many raisins in it, or their cookie having already been eaten (by them). A typical toddler reaction to being offered food they don't like is throwing the whole plate on the floor, but at least they've never eaten a plate in anger. Donald is the unequivocal champion of rage-aneurysms.
2. The Beast
Temper tantrums aside, no one has table manners quite like the Beast. This is almost exactly how my kids eat oatmeal, although they are at least polite enough to hold an ornamental spoon while they gorge themselves.
I'm not even talking about that "Betcha on land/They'd understand/Bet they don't reprimand their daughters" nonsense. Look: if your silverware drawer is empty, there are two possibilities for where all those forks ended up: either your toddler has hidden them in the couch cushions or behind the TV, or Ariel is using them to comb her stupid hair. Some people are trying to eat spaghetti here, mermaid.
The amount of time a toddler can stay tuned into a request like "let's put your books away" or "let's try not hitting your sister with a puzzle board for a while" is miniscule, but it still dwarfs the amount of time before Dory forgets about her quest to figure out what happened to Nemo. And at least the toddler isn't speaking whale the whole time.
Pumbaa is probably stinkier than even the worst diaper blowout, judging by his ability to spontaneously wilt the surrounding vegetation. Still, I do not recommend standing downwind from your toddler if it's avoidable.
Toddlers are inherently covetous creatures, but they could learn a lot from Abu, who has never met someone else's meal/jewelry/magic carpet he didn't want. At least toddlers don't have a prehensile tail.
Few things can match a toddler's knack for sheer destruction (or drool), but Stitch can bring it and then some. Also, much like a toddler, he's cute, and thus eminently forgivable for the damage that ensues--which makes him even more difficult to deal with.
(Image: Tutye / Getty)