When my twins were three, my stance on video games and iPhone apps was pretty extreme: not allowed. I wasnât anti-technology; I just felt that 3-year-olds would benefit infinitely more from doing things in the real world rather than on a video screen. I wanted to make sure they could use actual crayons and markers before they had a virtual palette at their fingertips. I wanted them to be able to kick a ball across the yard before they tossed them across video fields with a controller. I also saw no need to introduce them to the world of video games when weâd just barely introduced Candy Land. More
If youâre a mother of twins, phrases such as âYouâve got your hands full!â and âDouble trouble!â become as annoyingly common as âHot enough for ya?â becomes in summer. As a rule, people think having twins is very difficult, and I donât plan on telling them any different. It can be hard of course, but it also has plenty of advantages. More
When my twins turned three, my friend who had 4-year-old twins asked me what camp I was sending them to. When I replied, âOh weâre not doing camp, theyâre too littleâ our conversation abruptly stopped. More
Ferberizing twins is not for sissies. Any mother who can tough out even one night listening to two babies scream at the same time is a stronger woman than I am. All the moms who had Ferberized their baby or babies back when mine were infants told me itâs just three to five nights of hell, and then you have babies who sleep through the night. It sounds so easy, who wouldnât give it a shot? More
The first few months of twinfancy are pretty crazy, and the last thing you need is anything that can pull you down when youâre barely keeping your head above water. Here are some sinkholes to avoid. More
Shortly after my twins were born, I went to a twin momâs club meeting held at the home of a member who had twin toddlers. I couldnât believe how elegant and sophisticated her house wasâwhite loveseats in front of a fireplace, a marble table topped with an enormous plant, a staircase that wasnât flanked with baby gates. It was hard to imagine that even one child lived there. I had to ask her how she kept her house looking so beautiful with twins running around and she said, âOh I just try to keep them out of this room and when theyâre in here, itâs just a lot of âNo touch! No touch!ââ
That was it? âNo touch?â and you could have a house that didnât look like a Gymboree inside? Well I was certainly willing to try. More
Everything you read or hear on the subject will stress that you should never, ever compare your twins unless you are trying to ruin their lives or win an award for Worst Twin Parent. While it seems logical that babies who are exactly the same age should be able to master the same skills around the same time, that of course is not the case, for fraternal as well as identical twins. More
I started making my own baby food for my twins, because apart from apricots and a few other fruits, jarred baby food tastes pretty terrible. I had a fantastic book called Super Baby Food that needs a good edit but Iâd recommend anyway. The upside of making their food was knowing my kids were getting the best nutritious ingredients possible, but the downside was how fast it all disappears when you have two babies to feed. Compared to shaking formulaâpeeling, cubing, steaming and pureeing butternut squash is an absolute shitload of work. More
The twin playgroup I joined when my twins were about 10 months old turned out to be a lifesaver for me, and six years later Iâm still in contact with all the original mothers. Our group consisted of seven mothers and 14 babies, so there was never a dull or quiet moment. There were actually so many unfinished conversations that weâd often have a follow-up group email afterwards, giving everyone a chance to finish the thoughts that had been interrupted by a fall, a bite or a diaper change. More
Last week, I wrote about own desire to go straight for the c-section when delivering my twins. But both my cousin Rena and friend Christina are heroes in my eyes, because I couldnât contemplate going through what they did to bring their twins into the world.
After having her first child vaginally, my cousin Rena delivered her twins vaginally, and hearing her story while I was pregnant with my own set of twins reinforced my decision to schedule a C. My cousin is very much like me in that she tells it like it is. I knew that more than anyone, sheâd tell me the real deal without an ounce of sugarcoating, and thatâs exactly what I needed.
Iâm one of those women who never felt that ânaturalâ birth sounded all that naturalâand even if I only had one baby my ideal delivery would have been a c-section. So one of the first things I wanted to make sure was that my doctor would be on board with a scheduled C. Luckily, he believed that c-sections are the safest way to deliver twins and said that would have been his suggestion anyway. More
I was so far gone by the end of the third month that I couldnât visualize things getting better. My sleep deficit got worse and crying became something I did as regularly as breathing and walking. I couldnât think of a better plan. I was just slogging away, trying to keep these two fragile little humans alive and happy. More
I wiped everything down with Wet Wipesâthe window, the window shade, the remotes, the trays, and the armrests. I had just started cleaning the seat and the floor with wide strips of masking tape when my seatmate arrived to see that she was sitting next to a Crazy Peanut-Allergy Parent. I assured her I wasnât a lunatic. It was just our first flight and I was doing everything anyone recommended to get through it. More
First of all, donât be disappointed if youâre not allowed to sign up. Sad as it sounds, many classes such as baby gym classes (like Gymboree) and swimming lessons have a one adult to one baby requirement. This works out for the stay-at-home-mom with a live-in nanny, women with partners who can take time off, or women with agreeable relatives living nearby. But itâs not such a great deal for the rest of us.
One of my friends hired a babysitter to come to baby-gym classes with her, but personally if Iâm paying for a babysitter, Iâm going shopping or out to dinner. More