So Kim replied like any other woman trying to make her husband suck down a nice heaping helping of her body waste, and replied: “I just pushed out two of your children, one of whom was in breach, and my pussy is torn to hell because of it. You are drinking the fucking smoothie Kroy.” More
Topic: The Real Housewives
We’ll just clarify that “Italian Stye” equals, “give your husband sex whenever he wants it, even if he’s totally skeeving you out and you don’t want it at all.” Anyone who watches the show knows that her husband, Joe Gorga, is constantly groping her and she’s constantly looking slightly disgusted and annoyed by him. But this is what makes a healthy marriage, as far as Melissa is concerned. More
Real Housewives of Atlanta darling, NeNe Leakes, may have divorced husband¬†Gregg Leakes in 2011. But I guess the couple that films reality TV shows together stays together? The pair re-wed over the weekend in Atlanta and all your favorite Housewives, across multiple Bravo networks, were in attendance — along with various things to shill. More
Real Housewives star, and I suppose Bravo TV starlet, Kim Zolciak, is expecting her fifth baby with her 27-year-old husband¬†Kroy Biermann. And despite having two daughters,¬†Brielle and Ariana, from a previous relationship, Kim is pushing for another girl to douse in pink and glitter. You go with your uterus, Kim. More
I was somewhere in the most recent season of Real Housewives of Atlanta when Porsha Williams had a tense conversation with husband Kordell Stewart.¬†He was lecturing her on why she needed to choose between having a baby or a career √† la¬†Mad Men, while also implying that he would not assist in the childrearing — nor would they be hiring a nanny. I was thinking to myself, “Wow! She’s crying and looks really unhappy. She should totes divorce that guy.”
Turns out that guy is totes divorcing her. More
There’s a tad too much gender essentialism floating around parenting conversations in 2013 and you don’t even need to tune into sexist diaper ads to hear any of it. While some stay-at-home dads are trying to wake advertisers up to the fact that — yes — a man is capable of running a home without burning it down, others are still toting that tired Only A Mother Can Do It All logic. Like Yolanda Foster from The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. More
Bravo’s darling Kim Zolciak, and mother of four, is spring break ready judging by her most recent bikini purchase. The new mother, who welcomed¬†Kash¬†Kade¬†six months ago, is proudly back into swimsuits and Instragramming it for all you Real Housewives fanatics. And it turns out that it isn’t just tabloids and daytime morning segments that go crazy for “post-baby bodies.” It’s Real Housewives fans. But what are Real Housewives starlets if not professional promoters of personality brands? They know the deal. Modern PR rule number one (or at least two or three). “Post-baby body” = massive head turning. More
If anyone is sick of Brandi Glanville talking, it’s me. Believe me. I’m the one who can’t even swing around a Beyonce headline without bumping into the latest chapter in the Brandi Glanville LeAnn Rimes saga, and for those of you who find yourself in exceedingly long grocery store lines right along the tabloid shelf, I’m sure you feel the same way. But ever one to go the extra sleazy sexist mile, the Daily Mail says that since Brandi Glanville can pull off a postpartum bikini, she should just stop talking period. More
Ever since Real Housewives starlet Brandi Glanville‘s book has come out, Drinking and Tweeting, journalists have been skimming what I’m sure are some very¬†exhilarating¬†pages to juice even more details from the Brandi Glanville LeAnn Rimes¬†debacle¬†– which it turns out has been the perfect platform to sell a book. This is what I like to call MFTD — Made For Tabloid Drama. So much so that I can’t even properly investigate Kate Middleton’s pregnancy shawls without finding myself Brandi Glanville adjacent. Every time I suit up to go dig for pregnancy rumors or swim in the bowels of tabloid comments, I’m treated to a new gem of how mother Brandi Glanville handles the parenting thing.
The Brandi Glanville Eddie Cibrian LeAnn Rimes drama is probably about as interesting as that Real Housewives episode you have DVRed for later. I’m not really paying attention except for those need to know Real Housewives parenting tips such as using Twitter for co-parenting. True gems. But I heard the equivalent of record scratch when an excerpt from¬†Brandi Glanville’s new book reportedly has the reality star joking about how her ex-husband raped her. Nothing engenders a hearty laugh like rape!
Adrienne Maloof secret is out — and it’s not even salacious. The next time somebody wants to have a surrogate in private, remind me not to care.
I can’t be the only mom who looks at the feud between Brandi Glanville and LeAnn Rimes and thinks it can be solved by sending them both to their rooms and grounding them from having access to the Internet for a while. Now, I may not be an expert on Real Housewives or country music, but I am an expert on other things, like candy and Adam And The Ants and the BBC television show Luther, so I can say as an expert on things that both Brandi and LeeAnn need to STFU and stop drama-vomiting all over the world and remember that they are not only grownass women, but they are grownass women who are supposed to be co-parenting children. More
NeNe Leakes is giving hope to ladies of The Real Housewives¬†franchise. Aside from Bethenny Frankel, NeNe remains one of the few ladies to actually turn table flipping and cocktail party fights into a legitimate career. Take note, Bravo housefraus! Someone is doing this whole reality TV platform right. But the mother of two is further cementing her ascent into¬†legitimate¬†acting by echoing the relationship patterns of one of the greats: marrying her ex-husband. More
Brace yourself for all the “what a crazy hormonal lady!” claims to come out of this one. More