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Now I have stepchildren in my life and I’m not really sure what to expect, or how to be proactive when it comes to my two stepchildren. I don’t want to feel like Mother’s Day is the Biggest Let Down of The Year. I know I shouldn’t EXPECT anything. And while I don’t really, I can’t help but know my stepchildren are in my house 50 percent of the time. More
When I was 17, I was in love with a boy who was my entire world. He was a few years older and enlisted in the military, going off to boot camp and serving in far away places throughout his military career. Meanwhile I finished high school and enrolled in college, trying to continue my life while writing daily letters, awaiting intermittent phone calls and widely spaced visits in person. At the time, I thought that he would eventually get out of the military, return home to me and then we would finally get married and raise a family. I was too young and naive to fully grasp what that plan truly encompassed. More
There is a lot of jealousy when it comes to blending families. Case in point? Technology. My fiancé has to rotate the photo on his iPhone screen because he is surrounded by a bunch of jealous family members, half biologically related, half not. More
I met my husband’s children about a month into our romantic relationship. It was a bit soon, in case you’re wondering. They’d never met any of the other women he dated and viewed me with the kind of suspicion that either rendered them rude or mute in my presence. As empathetic as I felt, “Why are you always here?” is not a question that endears a child to anyone, especially when you’ve only met them three times and have taken care to make sure they’ve seen their dad alone in between those visits. More
Your stepmom totally has her hands full with five kids, so maybe she is throwing back shots of tequila in secret to help her cope with these kids and it is making her act like a racist, judgy, bigot, bitchface in public. I suggest you stage an intervention! More
I also know that part of the reason we love each other is because I let us, I never guarded my heart against him. Not just because I loved his father. I’m sure that made it easier, but mainly because I believe that all kids want to love and be loved, if we let them. All humans do. More
Any issues with my stepson weren’t his fault, but the fault of miscommunication between me and his father. More
As children we are taught to “share, share, share!” But as adults, especially an adult who has been through a divorce or separation, sharing, you learn, can suck. This is why, before my boyfriend moves in, I’m making him sign a cohabitation agreement. More
Welcome to Splitsville. This weekly column will focus on parenting after a divorce, break-up or one-night stand that didn’t end like a Katherine Heigl movie.
Blended families aren’t really known for their simplicity. The family structure is rarely predictable and the schedule is hectic, to say the least. But hopefully, every group can find a rhythym that works for them. It takes lots of communication and plenty of give-and-take, but a compromise can be reached!
Once a family hits this precarious balance, it’s hard to break from the habit. You begin to build a routine and no one wants to throw a screw in the system. And nothing alters a blended families balance more than a new addition.
That’s right! Enter the step-parents. More
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My boyfriend’s ex-wife does not want me at her daughter’s birthday party. She feels “uncomfortable” and “not ready to meet me,” as my boyfriend has just told me. (She’s also told her children this.) I’ve been dating him for a year now, and my daughter, his kids and I are now “blended.” They sleep over often. We hang out often. There are plans for him and his kids to move in with my daughter and me. (He has 50 percent custody.) There are a number of feelings I have about her not wanting me at her daughter’s birthday party, even though her daughter wants my daughter and me to be there. More
Welcome to Splitsville. This weekly column will focus on parenting after a divorce, break-up or one-night stand that didn’t end like a Katherine Heigl movie.
Blended families have a notoriously difficult time with the titles for each parent. Even more confusing can be explaining those pet names and relationships to those outside the family. My daughter has come up with her own system, but not everyone understands it. More
Here at Mommyish, we realize that ‘stepmom’ might have some troubling connotations. Our very own Rebecca Eckler has discussed the need for another title, any title that doesn’t remind us of fairy tale villains. LeAnn Rimes obviously agrees, because she’s decided to go with the name “Bonus Mom”. Rimes and new husband, Eddie Cibrian, were out with his two young sons recently in Malibu. Here is Rimes pushing her 4 year-old stepson, Jake, on the swings. More
The other day I received a Facebook message from one of my boyfriend’s daughters that read, “I love you so much. I miss you so much. Xoxoxo.”
I absolutely loved receiving that e-mail because I’ve become very close with my boyfriend’s daughters and, apparently, they love me, too. I will babysit them if their dad needs to be at soccer. I take them shopping. I cuddle and watch movies with them. I helped the eldest with talk of periods and went swimsuit shopping with her. I wrestle with his youngest daughter and share her hairdryer. I’m doing things that, well, are very motherly things. In fact, I pretty much will do for them what I do for my own daughter.
My boyfriend and I have discussed marriage and moving in together in the next few months. The marriage and the moving into together do not scare me. What scares me is becoming a “stepmother.” More
