Topic: parenting

STFU Parents: On Crushing Children’s Spirits — And Their Parents’ Spirits, Too

STFU Parents: On Crushing Children's Spirits -- And Their Parents' Spirits, Too

If you’ve ever heard the expression “crushing children’s spirits” and rolled your eyes, then today’s column is for you! (Conversely, if your response to that expression is, “Hear hear!”, then today’s column will probably piss you off.) It’s no secret that watching a child experience disappointment can be harder on the parents than on the child, because children represent all that is pure and innocent. Kids don’t know the cold realities that lay ahead; they’re just taking in the world through a neon green swizzle straw! But the fact is, kids will experience disappointment in the real world, and their parents can’t protect them forever.
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I’m Learning To Accept That My 9-Year-Old Flat Out Hates School

I'm Learning To Accept That My 9-Year-Old Flat Out Hates School

When I was a child, I loved school. I loved high school. I loved university. I loved writing essays and taking tests. I even loved studying. My daughter however does not like anything about school. She doesn’t like homework. She doesn’t even seem to like learning in a classroom setting. She would rather read books on her own. Ask her any fact about any animal and she will be able to tell you. In short, she does not like school! More »

Starbucks Reasonably Handles A Public Diaper Changing Fiasco By Calling The Cops

Starbucks Reasonably Handles A Public Diaper Changing Fiasco By Calling The Cops

Diaper changes in places of consumption — such as cafes and restaurants — are detested for a reason. Granted, I find myself sympathetic to the parent who is scrambling for a changing table and simply cannot find one. Especially when the changing tables are in the lady-only restrooms. What are double daddies, or even a daddy, supposed to do? If you’re Ruth Burgos, you’re simply going to change that tot right there in the Starbucks seating area. Hey, it was Mother’s Day! More »

I’m Not Prepared For My Second Kid Either

I’m Not Prepared For My Second Kid Either

Number two is on the way – soon. I’m due in less than a week. Lately I’ve been wondering – will I automatically be a pro this time around because I have done it all before? Yeah – I don’t think so. I’ve often wondered why I have such an inferiority complex about motherhood, and I think I’ve finally figured it out. Everyone else is just doing waaaaay too well. Stop showing off ladies – give the rest of us a break. More »

Twinning: Playgroups Are A Life Line

Twinning: Playgroups Are A Life Line

The twin playgroup I joined when my twins were about 10 months old turned out to be a lifesaver for me, and six years later I’m still in contact with all the original mothers. Our group consisted of seven mothers and 14 babies, so there was never a dull or quiet moment. There were actually so many unfinished conversations that we’d often have a follow-up group email afterwards, giving everyone a chance to finish the thoughts that had been interrupted by a fall, a bite or a diaper change. More »

I’m Still Not Comfortable As A Mother

I'm Still Not Comfortable As A Mother

Since suffering through that impossibly difficult first year with a challenging baby, I have never really allowed myself to get into a groove as a mother. This isn’t a sob story about how kids constantly change and ruin your perfectly laid plans. I gave up those expectations years ago. I have learned to really go with the flow in practice. Yet in my mind, I find myself always waiting for the other shoe to drop. Four years and two kids later – despite many more good days than bad – I constantly wonder “when is it going to be like that again?” More »

My Mother’s Biggest Parenting Mistake Taught Me That Motherhood Is Really Damn Hard

My Mother's Biggest Parenting Mistake Taught Me That Motherhood Is Really Damn Hard

We grew our vegetables in the garden, and she canned them, standing over steaming pots in late August, so we had super-local produce all winter. She taught me how to tie my shoe, how to knit and sew, how to play cribbage. She did the latter well enough that my husband refuses to play against me now. We took the odd day off of school to take the T into Boston and visit the Museum of Fine Arts and have tea. My mom helped my dad gut and renovate a 75-year-old house themselves, with little kids in tow, and we were cloth diapered and she used the clothesline and yes, I realize that this all seems made up, because who really does this? More »

My Mother’s Biggest Parenting Mistake Taught Me To Be Wary Of Overbooking My Kids

My Mother's Biggest Parenting Mistake Taught Me To Be Wary Of Overbooking My Kids

My mom hated the concept, and still does, of ANY extracurricular activity—if and when I joined anything—and my track record (never actually ran track) was pretty modest. Anything I wanted to do: build sets for drama, enter the science fair, try out for tennis, or simply peddle cookies; well
 I had to work hard on the PR angle and make Mom see that it was worth our time.

“Kids need to just be,” she’d insist and still does, especially now that her grandchildren are heavy into piano lessons. More »

STFU Parents: Happy Mother’s Day To Gold Star Moms

STFU Parents: Happy Mother's Day To Gold Star Moms

Happy early Mother’s Day, everyone! To help celebrate the official day people give thanks to their moms (as opposed to every other day of the year when you can treat your mom like total garbage — KIDDING!), I’m handing out Gold Stars like they’re candy. These moms have earned it! It takes a special kind of person to write about the ups and downs of parenting via quirky status updates that read as pure entertainment. Sure, it’d be easy to focus on the weight of a parent’s job — to keep kids fed, to mold minds and prepare little ones to survive in the world one day on their own — but thankfully, many people take a different approach to Facebook that’s far more fun to read. More »

My Mother’s Biggest Parenting Mistake Taught Me Children Need To Leave The Nest

My Mother's Biggest Parenting Mistake Taught Me Children Need To Leave The Nest

Right now my daughter is obsessed with Finding Nemo. At 27 months, she doesn’t get why my husband and I cry during most of the movie. Experiencing the devastating story of losing a spouse, having your child taken, and having to let that child go back into the wide world as soon as you recover him, probably makes us pretty average parents. But it’s the movie’s final lesson I find especially wrenching: that our children are supposed to leave us, that leaving is normal, healthy, and necessary. I don’t ask my own mom to help me prepare for my daughter’s departure because my mom has never come to terms with my leaving her. More »

My Mother’s Biggest Parenting Mistake Taught Me Not To Rely On Kids For Emotional Support

My Mother's Biggest Parenting Mistake Taught Me Not To Rely On Kids For Emotional Support

There was one winter we lived for months with no gas, meaning we didn’t have central heat, because we didn’t have the money to get it reconnected. Meanwhile, my mom was working through the emotions of a failed marriage and had no one to talk to.

She and I have always been close, and so she turned to me to vent her worries and frustrations about money or my dad. I didn’t have the words at the time to tell her that she was giving me a burden my small shoulders weren’t strong enough to bear. More »

Huggies Twitter-Based App Notifies Parents That Their Baby Needs A Diaper Change Like That’s Cool Or Something

Huggies Twitter-Based App Notifies Parents That Their Baby Needs A Diaper Change Like That's Cool Or Something

Let’s hope a Twitter-based app to ping you when your little one has peed is more about novelty than actual function. But what novelty? While there are certainly throngs of parents who are admitted social media addicts, resorting to a personalized tweet to learn of said peeing habits is like a huge Christmas present to STFU Parents. You gonna retweet that “my kid just peed!” tweet to your many, many followers mommies and daddies? Goodness knows some are doing it anyway. More »

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