Those of you who tuned into the new Bravo show Extreme Guide To Parenting may be thanking your lucky stars that you don’t have an Indigo child on your hands. One of the main characters, Shira, claims that her son is one – which basically just seems to mean she overlooks all of his jerk behavior, like telling her her cooking sucks, he hates her, and he wants to chop people’s heads off.
This got me thinking – my toddler is kind of a jerk, could he be an Indigo Child, too? Is he awash in an indigo aura? Is he part of the second coming of some super species that will save the planet? Or is he just a little 3-year-old asshole? More
The long-awaited premiere finally came last night, and while it is everything that I dreamed it would be and more, it was hard to celebrate because holy crap, it turns out that it really is possible to mess up your kids by projecting all of your issues on to them. More
Personally, I love the idea of teaching kids to be self-reliant. I’ve written about trying to raise independent, confident kids. And I get that free-range parenting is a good way to do it. But it’s not my thing. Free-range parenting is not for us. Yes, I understand that crime statistics are lower than ever. I’m not a hovering mother . . . my concern isn’t coming from paranoia about stranger danger. More
Do you ever tire of the constant stream of liberal propaganda that is childhood? Everywhere you turn it’s “share your toys” and “don’t bite your friends” and “take turns”. I’m not saying that Sesame Street is Communist, but if you think that the fact that Elmo is red is a coincidence, you are naive and brainwashed. More
My children are close in age- only 20 months apart. They do most everything together and are jolly, little BFF’s the vast majority of the time, much to my delight. They are five and six years old now and usually, they are happy playing with the same toys and doing the same activities. It is basically the dream I had in mind when we decided to space our children so close together. More
Each of the ten poems in Struwwelpeter contains rhyming couplets describing in detail the gruesome downfall of children who misbehave. Some teaching moments Hoffman includes address grooming, animal welfare, fire safety, gun safety, eating healthily, and white supremacy. More
As parents, we all have struggles in raising our kids. Anyone who says they do not struggle with parenting in some fashion is either delusional or lying. As a mother, I pride myself on my ability to see my kids and the way I parent them with completely clear vision. I know their flaws, I know their strengths and I know my own as well. I am the first one to point out when I have done something wrong in parenting and I am also the first to notice if my kids are acting a fool. That said, my kids are absolutely fabulous eaters but I would never judge you for your picky kid. More
As mothers, we are undeniably different in a myriad of ways. The choices we make for our children since birth sometimes come to define the way we think of ourselves as parents. Some of us breastfeed exclusively until our babies aren’t babies. Some go straight to formula. Some homeschool or unschool or nature school while others prefer good old fashioned public school. Some cosleep and others think a crib down the hall ensures everyone gets the best rest. No matter how tolerant we are of each other’s choices, we undoubtedly have opinions about what is best. That’s because we’re mothers and we (mostly) care deeply about these seemingly menial choices. At times, they can feel like the most important thing in our universe.
Should a witch destroy your ability to have human children by slaughtering a horse to perform blood magic over the septic, comatose body of your husband, just adopt a couple of dragons. It’s okay to call them your scalebabies. More
Still, I like the idea of viking parenting because I feel like if you tried to get all judgey on a viking mother for letting her kid watch T.V. she would be all YOU DARE QUESTION THE JUDGEMENT OF THE SHIELDMAIDEN LAGERTHA? I WILL CRACK YOUR BONES AND SUCK THE MARROW, THRALL. More
I like to consider myself a calm parent. I do my best not to yell at my kids and instead speak to them in a quiet, rational voice when they do something that displeases me. I have been practicing this gentle parenting method for many, many years and I have come to this scientific conclusion:
This shit don’t work.
This has led me to develop my brand new hot parenting style you have to try, Free-Rage Parenting™. More
I forgot to adhere to a style when my kid was little, which is why invented the Keeping Your Kid Alive Parenting Style, a system that mostly involves checking to see that food goes in the mouth hole, poop comes out of another hole, and that breathing continues to occur. So far, that’s worked out splendidly for me. More
I have a strange fascination with parenting styles, mostly because I parented without one for so long. Now I watch in awe and wonder as people hang their kids over trash cans, insisting that urging them to shit in a dumpster is completely “instinctive”. More
Listen, everyone needs a parenting style, okay? Babies are something akin to artisinal crafting endeavors or really expensive handbags, and if you don’t subscribe very rigidly to one style or another, you might forget that and start treating them like little humans instead, which is unacceptable. More