Yet another article has been written about the dangers of putting your kids before your partner. I’m left wondering what planet all of these parents who can put their partners first live on, because I would like to move there. More
Topic: parenting styles
When you have a group of moms together and someone mentions when their kid started walking or talking or reading or some other developmental milestone I have, on occasion, chimed in about how my own kid did that. But earlier. Or better. When in reality I think my kids sort of did everything at the age of what the parenting books said they should be expected to. We all want our kids to be some sort of special snowflake, when the truth is all of our kids sort of suck equally. More
A NYT Motherlode column titled, “Confessions of a Mother Who Couldn’t Say No” got me thinking about what exactly the function of “no” is. It turns out those of us that don’t have the luxury of being able to smother our kids all day long, may actually be okay mothers, too. I’m fostering independence in my child because I have to – not necessarily because I choose to. More
But one thing I do know, is that there are some things that are pretty much guaranteed to piss a Sanctimommy off, and have her give you her two cents (make that 50 cents) on everything you are doing to fail at being a parent. Here are ten of ‘em. More
Because I have four children I have been around this baby raising block a bit. I may not have all of the answers, but I do know at least ten things that are utterly one gazillion percent totally, completely, utter bullshit when it comes to raising kids. You are going to hear a lot of obnoxious nonsense when you have babies. Some of these things will be said to your by your own parents, or relatives, or by well-meaning strangers who have no idea what the hell they are talking about. More
I always assumed that “nonviolent parenting” – which I thought I practiced, meant not hitting your kids or screaming at them or berating them. If nonviolent parenting also includes not using rewards, bribes or punishments than I’m totally not doing that, because I bribe my own kids a lot. And I love having my kids open and honest and able to talk freely with me and their father, but that doesn’t include them using unkind language or being tiny little assholes to us. Childhood is such a fun, magical time in many ways, and I’m glad so many kids don’t feel in a hurry to grow up, but I really don’t think kids feel this way because parents are “helicopter pampering” them or letting them get away with being jerks. More
Go through any camper’s mail, and apparently you will find elaborate systems for sneaking in junk and other forbidden items. Many camps have banned the “care-package” for a variety of reasons and some parents just aren’t having it. More
Today’s installment of “WTF?” comes from a Dear Prudence column. A mother writes in for advice about an uncomfortable situation her 8-year-old daughter landed her in, when she offered to give away a family heirloom to a friend, and the friend’s mother took the 8-year-old’s offer as some sort of binding contract. More
The Calm The Fuck Down, or CTFD method of parenting is really quite empowering. It reminds us to chill out and stop being such neurotic, perfectionist parents. More
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I read a story this week about parents who obsessively track every little thing their child does. They’ve been doing it since infancy. To each their own. I don’t have to buy the graph paper and pencils, but I still want to discuss these people for a minute. More
If you are going to be a Tiger parent, you better temper it with some affection and support or you’re going to end up raising some sad kids with questionable social skills. More
If you make fun of something as superficial as another girl’s outfit to the point that girl can’t bear to go to school, you have your freedom to choose your own clothes — and have someone buy them for you — taken away. If what happens after that causes humiliation, because your friends don’t like you as much when you wear clothes that are different, that’s fair game. Hopefully, it gave her a perspective of empathy for the classmate she teased, unlike unrelated punishments such as losing certain in home privileges. More
I cannot be the only mom out there doing the Olivia Pope voice at her kids or spouse to get people to do what I want. It does not work on my husband because he knows what I am doing but on the kids it works like a charm. I was speaking to my sister the other day and when we were talking about the upcoming season finale I told her about my little Olivia imitation and she admitted she did the exact same thing. And it also worked for her! So come on, admit it, have you tried this yet? Are we all becoming more effective parents due to Olivia Pope? More
The last thing I need right now is to have a kindergartner that is smarter than me. That would really push me over the edge. Gus Dorman knows every element in the periodic table. He reads newspapers in the bathroom. He’s five.