Topic: holiday traditions

12 Photos That Prove Making Your Child Sit On The Easter Bunny’s Lap Is A Horrible Idea

12 Photos That Prove Making Your Child Sit On The Easter Bunny's Lap Is A Horrible Idea

Is there really a kid in existence who is happy with the idea of breathing life into a giant bunny? I don’t think so. The Easter Bunny tradition needs some work. Can we just agree that henceforth he should be a real-sized bunny who happily hops around your yard leaving jellybeans in his wake, not a giant monstrosity with a fixed smile who will haunt your kids’ dreams for life? More »

I Need To Know All The Gory Deets About How Kids Find Out The Truth About Santy Claus

I Need To Know All The Gory Deets About How Kids Find Out The Truth About Santy Claus

My oldest son is only two and can barely talk, but my husband and I have already been discussing how we’re going to handle Old St. Nick. As luck would have it, we were both raised in religious households. Now that we have kids of our own, we both agree that it was pretty annoying for our parents to kick the concept of Santa Claus in the balls just because Jesus is the reason for the season. More »

Christmas Traditions Way Better Than The Obnoxious Elf On The Shelf

Christmas Traditions Way Better Than The Obnoxious Elf On The Shelf

Right off the bat, I need to admit something. I am an Elf Mom. No, don’t click away! Look, at first I only put it on literal shelves and in high places. Then I felt the Pinterest pressure and tried to step up my game with a few Barbie car rides and Goldfish cracker fishing. Now, three years in, I am in the basement creating Elf-Zilla, the elf who is hell bent on destroying the Lego Friends’ village. He breathes paper fire. (No, I don’t have a lot of local friends. Why do you ask?) More »

All You New Year’s Eve Party People Have Fun On Amateur Night, I’ll Be In Bed By Nine

All You New Year's Eve Party People Have Fun On Amateur Night, I'll Be In Bed By Nine

I hate New Year’s Eve. I always have. New Year’s Eve is the holiday equivalent of the Sunday night 60 Minutes signature Aristo stopwatch ticking, which is probably the saddest sound on earth. New Year’s Eve is amateur night, when people get all dressed up and go out into the freezing winter night, trudging with silk heels through filthy snow-plowed curbs to make their way to overcrowded bars, eight dollar glasses of eight dollars a bottle “champagne” and cheap paper tiaras made from silver cardboard and dayglo feathers. More »

As An Adult, I’ve Realized That All My Favorite Christmas Movies Really Suck

As An Adult, Iâve Realized That All My Favorite Christmas Movies Really Suck

I’m a child of the 80′s. And as such, I’m used to the feeling of realizing that the things I loved as a kid are actually really weird. I mean, I thought overalls were the most awesome thing ever. But I have to admit that my disappointment over some of my favorite Christmas movies feels especially painful. Smoky Mountain Christmas, anyone? The Night They Saved Christmas? These were the December movies of my childhood and they are downright agonizing to watch as an adult. More »

In Defense Of Lying To Your Child About Santa Claus

In Defense Of Lying To Your Child About Santa Claus

I’m a liar. I’m a big, fat tall-tale-teller. When my daughter asks if fairies like Tinkerbell are real, I reply, “They are if you believe they are.” When Easter rolls around, I have a friend hide eggs in my house while we’re gone so that she arrives home with a huge look of shock and wonder on her face. And when it comes to Santa Claus, we’ll be baking cookies and leaving “Reindeer feed” on the lawn. More »