Topic: blended family

12 Things Not To Say To A Blended Family Mom

12 Things Not To Say To A Blended Family Mom

My family is what most people call a blended family. I married my husband almost seven years ago, and when we met I had a child from a previous relationship, a daughter (now nine) who my husband loves like his own kid. We went on to have two kids together, my 5-year-old daughter and my 3-year-old son.

It worked for us then and it works for us now, but this isn’t always satisfying for the teeming masses, yearning to breathe free stay all up in my biznezz. More »

I’m Scared That My Stepchildren Will Let Me Down This Mother’s Day

Iâm Scared That My Stepchildren Will Let Me Down This Motherâs Day

Now I have stepchildren in my life and I’m not really sure what to expect, or how to be proactive when it comes to my two stepchildren. I don’t want to feel like Mother’s Day is the Biggest Let Down of The Year. I know I shouldn’t EXPECT anything. And while I don’t really, I can’t help but know my stepchildren are in my house 50 percent of the time. More »

Anonymous Mom: I Wish I Had Accidentally Gotten Pregnant

Anonymous Mom: I Wish I Had Accidentally Gotten Pregnant

When I was 17, I was in love with a boy who was my entire world. He was a few years older and enlisted in the military, going off to boot camp and serving in far away places throughout his military career. Meanwhile I finished high school and enrolled in college, trying to continue my life while writing daily letters, awaiting intermittent phone calls and widely spaced visits in person. At the time, I thought that he would eventually get out of the military, return home to me and then we would finally get married and raise a family. I was too young and naive to fully grasp what that plan truly encompassed. More »

Being A Stepmother Has Made Me Want To Be A Biological Mother

Being A Stepmother Has Made Me Want To Be A Biological Mother

I met my husband’s children about a month into our romantic relationship. It was a bit soon, in case you’re wondering. They’d never met any of the other women he dated and viewed me with the kind of suspicion that either rendered them rude or mute in my presence. As empathetic as I felt, “Why are you always here?” is not a question that endears a child to anyone, especially when you’ve only met them three times and have taken care to make sure they’ve seen their dad alone in between those visits. More »

My Daughter And I Have Different Last Names, Which Really Sucks

My Daughter And I Have Different Last Names, Which Really Sucks

I’ve been thinking a lot about Kevin Federline, who has just had his fifth child with Victoria Price, his third Baby Mama (unfortunate, but true – not that he had another child but rather that I’m thinking about Federline at all). Mostly, I wonder about all his children’s last names. Truth be told, I’ve been wondering about my one child’s last name and how confusing that is. More »

Splitsville: How To Integrate Step-Parents Into Your Family

Splitsville: How To Integrate Step-Parents Into Your Family

Welcome to Splitsville. This weekly column will focus on parenting after a divorce, break-up or one-night stand that didn’t end like a Katherine Heigl movie.

Blended families aren’t really known for their simplicity. The family structure is rarely predictable and the schedule is hectic, to say the least. But hopefully, every group can find a rhythym that works for them. It takes lots of communication and plenty of give-and-take, but a compromise can be reached!

Once a family hits this precarious balance, it’s hard to break from the habit. You begin to build a routine and no one wants to throw a screw in the system. And nothing alters a blended families balance more than a new addition.

That’s right! Enter the step-parents. More »

My Boyfriend’s Ex-Wife Wants Nothing To Do With Me

My Boyfriend's Ex-Wife Wants Nothing To Do With Me

My boyfriend’s ex-wife does not want me at her daughter’s birthday party. She feels “uncomfortable” and “not ready to meet me,” as my boyfriend has just told me. (She’s also told her children this.) I’ve been dating him for a year now, and my daughter, his kids and I are now “blended.” They sleep over often. We hang out often. There are plans for him and his kids to move in with my daughter and me. (He has 50 percent custody.) There are a number of feelings I have about her not wanting me at her daughter’s birthday party, even though her daughter wants my daughter and me to be there. More »

I Detest The Word ‘Stepmom.’ We Need A New Word For What I Am

I Detest The Word 'Stepmom.' We Need A New Word For What I Am

The other day I received a Facebook message from one of my boyfriend’s daughters that read, “I love you so much. I miss you so much. Xoxoxo.”

I absolutely loved receiving that e-mail because I’ve become very close with my boyfriend’s daughters and, apparently, they love me, too. I will babysit them if their dad needs to be at soccer. I take them shopping. I cuddle and watch movies with them. I helped the eldest with talk of periods and went swimsuit shopping with her. I wrestle with his youngest daughter and share her hairdryer. I’m doing things that, well, are very motherly things. In fact, I pretty much will do for them what I do for my own daughter.

My boyfriend and I have discussed marriage and moving in together in the next few months. The marriage and the moving into together do not scare me. What scares me is becoming a “stepmother.” More »