shutterstock_84149650Of all the parenting debates to have, technology and children is albeit one of the most privileged ones. Gifting iPhones, iPads, and other fancy gadgets to the 13 and under set carries a whole lot of socioeconomic statements. But for the First World Problems side of the world, handing over a 24/7 glowing screen with Internet access and Twittersphere and texting does evoke a slew of legitimate parenting concerns. Such as, will my daughter or son ever look out the window ever again? Will my teenager fall down an Internet sexting abyss? Which is why one mother took to an 18-point contract when handing the coveted device over to her 13-year-old.

Mother of five, Janelle Burley Hofman, published the contract in which she lays down the law to her new iPhone-owner of a son. Behold some Apple product parenting:

Dear Gregory –

Merry Christmas!  You are now the proud owner of an iPhone.  Hot Damn!  You are a good & responsible 13 year old boy and you deserve this gift.  But with the acceptance of this present comes rules and regulations.  Please read through the following contract.  I hope that you understand it is my job to raise you into a well rounded, healthy young man that can function in the world and coexist with technology, not be ruled by it.  Failure to comply with the following list will result in termination of your iPhone ownership.

I love you madly & look forward to sharing several million text messages with you in the days to come.