Everyone has their own personal reasons for having kids. But if we got really honest about it, I mean REALLY honest, those reasons probably wouldn’t make it into the baby book. Parents on Twitter are sharing what their kids’ names would be if they were named after the REAL reasons they were born. The honest kids’ names are hilarious and too real.

Image: Giphy

Honest kids’ names are what your sweet children would be named, if you picked a name based on the real reason they were born. Honest Toddler’s Mom tweeted out the idea, and people responded with gusto.

Can you imagine how many little Broken Condoms would be in your kid’s class? They better have middle names so teachers can tell them apart.

“Taco Truck! Stop pulling Mimosa’s hair!”

Honestly though, who could resist diamonds?

Kids are kind of like potato chips, in that you can’t have just one.

FRESH AND FROZEN. I cannot.

Listen, do you want to get rid of your sinus infection, or do you want an oops baby? You have to choose.

Sometimes it really is THAT easy.

Sex Education is a good name for kid.