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I admit, I took the bait and I totally clicked on the “14 Week Fetus Claps Its Hands In Utero” link. Mostly because I didn’t believe it and partly because I’m pregnant and already feverishly planning ways for my own fetus outdo a fetus that can do tricks. (We’re working on a knee slap, stay tuned.) But lo and behold, there it was…a hand-clapping fetus. Just like the title promised. I’m not going to play it cool here and tell you it was barely visible and that I think the parents were reaching a little bit. It’s totally effing clapping, you guys.

And the doctor actually hit rewind on the ultrasound (didn’t know there was such an option) in order to sync it up with the parents singing “If You’re Happy and You Know It.” It’s all very saccharine and sweet and JUST KILL ME NOW ENOUGH YOU GUYS. You can see it for yourself here, if you’re so inclined. Once you’ve watched it, why don’t you follow me on down to the comments section, will ya? There are plenty of pro-life, right-wing people preaching their spiel. You know, because fetuses are more of a person than a person is. They’re all “SEE LOOK THIS IS LIFE YOU MURDERERS” and the like.  I’ve pulled some of my favorite comments for you. You’re welcome.

From the “God Is Using You To Spread A Message” truther:

capon33

This video is now circulating the globe to pro-life & anti-abortion organizations. That’s how I came across it. God works in mysterious ways & now this video is further evidence of a human being in the womb. In this way God has used you Jen to further his cause for the protection of pre-born life.
From the “English Is Not My First Language But I’ll Still Shame You All” commenter:

Changik Oh

This proves fetus is fully human baby.

From the “You Have A Grown Man Inside Of You” commenter:
And many other people are trying to kill such children saying that they are not a men yet.
And it wouldn’t be complete without someone calling out “Pro-Abortioners”:
More proof shoved into every pro abortion idiotics faces, that life does not begin at birth
But my absolute favorite comment came from the mother of Clappy McFetus, Jen Cardinal:
The claps were a coincidence, involuntary movement, we want this baby very much and are thrilled at the happy coincidence, however, I fully and wholeheartedly support women’s reproductive rights and do NOT want this video somehow used to oppress them.
Amen to that.
(Photo: YouTube)