I have a beautiful little nine-year-old girl. She has gigantic warm melty chocolate eyes and waist length curly hair and a beautiful smile and the sort of skin poets write sonnets about. She is a cutie pie, a doll baby, and a pretty little thing and I tell her this daily. I call her beauty and pretty girl and tell her she looks gorgeous. Now, I know what you are thinking. What sort of self-proclaimed radical feminist actually focuses on physical beauty and dares to compliment her kid on her outward appearance? I do. Because even though I spend a huge part of my day complimenting her on her intellect, her curiosity, her kindness and her gigantic, empathetic, caring, heart I also tell her she is pretty. More
Author Archives: Eve Vawter
Avril Lavigne in the new video for Hello Kitty should be totally kid-friendly, at least at first glance. Even though she is almost 30-years-old, she still looks like a tween with her faux Skrillex multi-colored hair and her little cupcake skirt she purchased at some Katy Perry yard sale. Plus, the song is all about Hello Kitty, or at least that is the title of it until you actually listen to the song and realize it is all about Lavigne’s vagina. More
People traveling with breast milk can request that it be screened by hand ( which is called the “alternate” screening for medication) which may consist of a visual inspection or a wipe of the container’s exterior that supposedly detects explosives. Here’s hoping that Stacey’s fight means more moms won’t be detained for not wanting their child’s food exposed to radiation. More
You may know someone who is pregnant. How do you know? This can be tricky to know for sure. Offline it can be confusing because sometimes you may ask an acquantince you haven’t seen in a while “Oh, are you going to have a baby?” and they may punch you in the throat because they are only having a two beer and cheeseburger lunch baby or else they got a cute new empire waist baby doll top on clearance at Ross Dress For Less. Online can be confusing too, especially when navigating social media but here are some signs someone you know may be having a baby and discussing it on Facebook. More
There is a new private school for babies opening in Gramercy this fall and sending your baby to school there will only cost the bargain price of 33,492 dollars! Explore + Discover, an eight-classroom learning center for children from three months to two years old, will launch September 8 and will be the first of 26 similar learning centers that will open across the city over the next few years. 26 similar schools, because there are more than just a handful of parents who have enough money to send their babies to a school to teach them how to play. More
First of all, and I have tried to use my imagination for this one but to no avail, how does one make love on their elbows? Is this so the dude doesn’t crush the person he is making love to? What’s more, who uses the term makes love? Oh, let me guess, true gentlemen. Vom.
Appearing naked in a national magazine doesn’t make you brave. Especially when you are a Hollywood celebrity who can afford personal trainers, personal chefs, and and a whole bevy of photographers and art directors who are going to make sure you look perfectly gorgeous when being featured in a national magazine. More
I absolutely adore Ariel Gore, the publisher of Hip Mama magazine, and her books helped me through my pregnancies and she was the first parenting writer I ever really related to. Hip Mama is awesome and the latest issue hits newsstands next month, but not with the cover image Ariel wanted for it, because newsstands refuse to carry it due to the fact it features Barcelona-based artist Ana Alvarez-Errecalde breastfeeding her four-year-old son. More
The reason we hear about pitbulls eating people? Because they have a lot of strength and a high prey drive and of you don’t like it, too bad. Facts are facts. More
This is so lame! One does not have some big, highly publicized contest to choose a baby name and then decide at the last minute they don’t like the name that came up as the winner. More
This is what moms are for, not only sharing our wonderful traits and habits with our children, but by giving them a whole lot of mistakes that they can learn from us and one day pass on to their own kids. We want to hear the worst thing you accidentally taught your children! And the best worst thing is going to win a fabulous prize More
A few weeks ago when I first read about this case, I asked my lovely and amazing co-worker Bethany Ramos to cover this story and I believe her answer was SHUT UP EVE THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH PARENTING I CANNOT WRITE ABOUT THIS IT IS TOO AWFUL. Hence, I am usually the default writer when it comes to bringing you the truly awful news I cannot get any of the other writers to cover. Which brings us to my parenting angle: I cannot for the life of me understand any sexual fetish that involves animals or the hurting of animals and if any of my kids grew up to have this creepy fetish I would disown them post haste. More
Plus, even if she was, would that be any different than the guys we see wandering around the park with their tank tops on and their jeans exposing their ass cracks? Those dudes are never told to COVER UP. They just eat their Dole Whips and go on offending the world with their butt cleavage.
Your kid doesn’t get a Frozen doll. Too bad boo hoo, now they will grow up and hate you. That’s what you get parents, that is what you get! But I have a solution for you, oh boy do I ever, because I’m an amazingly smart person and I will share my wisdom with you so your dumb kid will stop whining about their dumb lack of Disney branded bullshit you will end up donating by next Easter anyway. More