Sexism is O-V-E-R!!! Not! But, I have to say, when I learned that there was a âDaddy and Meâ soccer class for toddlers, you bet your butt I signed my son (and my fiancĂ©) up.
âIt says, âDaddy and Me,â I told my fiancĂ©, who moaned that he already had two older children in soccer. âBut this is âDaddy and Me!â I swear, Iâve never heard of such a thing! Usually, itâs always âMommy and Meâ classes.â More
I think one of my daughterâs teachers really, really doesnât like me. I know! Shocking, right, that someone doesnât like me? Iâm at an age, I think, where I donât care whether adults hate me. Except, when you have this gut feeling that a teacher hates you, then you do actually care, because what if said teacher takes it out on your daughter, instead of just hating on you? More
Iâm pretty good with quick, snarky comebacks. But there is one sentence people say, especially to mothers, for which I do not have a good comeback. That sentence is, âYou look exhausted.â Sigh. More
Iâm pretty positive the creators and writers of young children programs are high as a fucking kite. Whatever it is they are on, when they come up with episodes, I just want to say, âIâd like some of that! How else am I going to get through these shows, without drugs?â More
Recently, on my FB page, I started, âMommy Brag Mondays!â Why? Because I have a lot to brag about when it comes to my children. I donât just want to share it with their fathers, my parents, or friends. I want the fucking world (or my 3000 followers) to know how fabulous my children are, whether they care or not. What can I say? I cooked some pretty awesome children. More
Iâve come to realize â a little too late â what a couple SHOULD talk about before having a baby is not how you donât like the name Kelly, because that was the name of the girl who bullied you throughout school, but about PARENTING STYLES.
Oops! It turns out that my fiancĂ© and I have somewhat different parenting styles, which I really only realized in the last few weeks. Our son is 21 months old. More
My daughter is so skinny that she has been stopped a handful of times to be asked to be a model in runway children shows. Each time, Iâve said âno,â because I believe she is too young to be directed into the modeling world, where sheâd probably end up eating cotton balls for meals.
If she does one day, when sheâs 18, wants to be a model, fine. But not now. Not when sheâs ten. More
I love my daughterâs teacher. Sheâs smart and makes me laugh. Especially when she wrote to me that she was starting an âOrganizational Club,â at school. Bahaha! I canât stop laughing about it, even though, of course, this teacher means well. More
Was I really supposed to, after trying to conceive him, race to the phone and call the pre-school to sign him up? Would it go something like this? âI just had sex. I may have conceived a baby. Please sign him/her up for pre-school now so when heâs a toddler heâll have a spot. Hereâs my deposit.â
But, as my daughter explained, the MOST popular of âThe Popularsâ take the private shower stalls. âBut how do people know who is popular and who isnât?â I asked my daughter. âYou just know,â was her answer. More
I think it is super important for parents to show affection to each other, especially in front of their kids. Iâm not talking full on make-out and humping, but hugs, kisses, sitting on laps, friendly pats on the butt, and saying, âI love you,â to each other, as parents, is something our kids need to see. More
I once looked forward to these nights â the ENTIRE bed to myself! Eating pizza in bed! Wearing my most ugly yet most comfortable pajamas! Not brushing my teeth! – but as I tried to fall asleep, I felt out of sorts and kind of lonely. The silence was deafening. That is, until I found Ellie, and spent the night sleeping with her. More
So I have one child who looks exactly like me and one son who looks nothing like me (or my daughter.) On the positive side, when I look at Holt, I see only his father, and that warms my heart. But on the negative, Holt made me gain almost 70 pounds and I had to have my stomach cut open because of him. Shouldnât I at least get a baby after all that who shares some feature â anything â of mine? More
I have three girls who love shopping at Victoria’s Secret, while my poor fiancĂ© has to sit around and wait for us to try on bra after bra. When we want to get our nails done, he, too, has to sit around and wait. Itâs not because we need him there. And itâs not because he enjoys watching us discuss polish colors. He just likes to spend time together with his family.
Weâre a really open family, so it was no surprise when my stepdaughter came home and said grumpily, âI got my period.â I responded back grumpily, âSo did I! Weâre on the same cycle!â and then we high-fived each other and popped some Advilâs together. Thereâs nothing like bonding with your stepdaughter having the same menstrual cycle. Soon enough, there will be five of us on the same cycle. More