A 6-Year-Old Evaluates Every Extracurricular Activity He’s Ever Done

With every new season, the Boys and Girls Club Brochure comes out, sending me and many other parents I know into a frenzy of agonizing over their kids’ extracurricular activities. This time, I decided to interview my 6-year-old son about every single activity he’s ever done before I signed him up for anything new. Below is a transcript of the interview, edited only for length and clarity. It’s possible that I’ve been overthinking things.

 

Biddy Tennis, taken at age 6 at Boys and Girls Club:

Son: We learned”¦what was it called? Serve and pass, which was when it started to not be so good.
Mom: What didn’t you like about that?
Son: Well, I didn’t really hit the ball so much”¦and it was boring and it was just boring.

Yoga, taken at age 4.5 at yoga studio:

Son: Pretty boring. It was a little too hard but I got pretty used to the downward dog, which I almost totally forgot about.
Mom: You did? Did we wait too long between yoga classes?

Son: No, not really.
Mom: I was just wondering if you could compare the first [yoga class you took] to the [one you’re taking now].
Son: Maybe [when we talk about] the second one.

Yoga, taken at age 6, offered for free at his school before school begins:

Mom: How does it make your body feel?
Son: Pretty good. Oh, and there’s a rest place that I never get to go to because there’s this person that always goes there, but otherwise it’s like a break place. If someone’s there and you need a break there’s like a child’s pose. I’ll show it to you (demonstrates pose)”¦ There’s like a relaxing time at the end. There are eye pillows. They don’t smell so good. And sometimes she puts on music and sometimes she makes us imagine.

Mom: What do you imagine?
Son: The only times we’ve imagined is about a rainbow. Seriously.
Mom: What do you imagine about the rainbow?
Son: I forget.

Nature Detectives, taken at age 6, run by staff from a local Audubon refuge after school:

Son: It’s like finding nature and the first couple days we observed nature. I couldn’t wait until the magnifying glasses on the day they were on the table.
Mom: What did you see with those?
Son: Seeds”¦[and] we were like observing bones”¦ They didn’t smell really good.
Mom: That’s awesome. This sounds like you’re really enjoying it. Is that true?
Son: Pretty much.
Mom: Is there anything you don’t like about it?
Son: Yeah, most of the time we’re just talking.
Mom: So would you recommend it to a friend?
Son: Mmm mmm mmmm (to the tune of ”I don’t know”).
Mom: You don’t know.
Son: I would say you should go but it’s pretty boring.
Mom: Really? Gosh, it doesn’t sound that boring, though.
Son: Well, I mean because it’s mostly talking.

Soccer, taken at age 4.5 and signed up again this spring, run by the town:

Mom: You took soccer a while ago. Like a year and a ””
Son: (interrupts) It was pretty boring.
Mom: Pretty boring.
Son: It was fun because [best friend] was on a different team and we even played an actual game against that team and it was like the next team over to that way (points).
Mom: So what made you decide not to do soccer the next time?
Son: Mmm mmm mmm. Oh, I remembered it was pretty boring. Most of these (gestures to list of all activities) are pretty boring.

 

French, an after-school class that lasted 12 weeks and was the most expensive thing we’ve ever signed him up for:

Son: The boringest that’s on this list
Mom: What was boring about it? Can you describe what you did?
Son: It’s like super boring. It’s only talking, and oh yeah, the excitingest day was”¦remember when you came to that day?
Mom: Yes, the play.
Son: It wasn’t really a play. Oh, and remember that CD [of French songs]?
Mom: Yeah, that’s a good CD.
Son: Yeah, except I haven’t listened to it in a long time.
Mom: Yeah, well, our CD player’s broken.

Swimming, taken at various establishments since age 3, and currently taking:

Son: We did back floats [this summer], that’s pretty much when I was learning to do back floats.
Mom: How do you like the feeling of swimming?
Son: Pretty good, except when you forgot my goggles. It gets in my eyes.
Mom: Yeah, I’m sorry about that [one time I forgot your goggles].

Kinder Sports, taken at age 5, a basic and extremely affordable gym class at the Boys and Girls Club:

Son: Maybe like the funnest one yet.
Mom: Really, of all the things we’ve talked about?
Son: Yeah, especially the obstacle course. [Floor] hockey. Whoa. Fun.

Closing remarks:

Mom: Can you tell me your favorite two things that we talked about?
Son: Kinder Sports and swimming.
Mom: Cool, that’s exactly what I would have guessed. What surprised me is that it sounded like Nature Detectives is pretty cool and yoga before school is pretty cool, too.
Son: Yeah, but also pretty boring.