5. Wash kids mouths out with soap when they say “evolution”, “science” or “dinosaurs”.
6. When your daughters tell you their hopes and dreams and they are something other than Baby Having and Husband Obeying smack those dreams down with a Bible.
7. Give your husband TOTAL control of everything. Even your uterus. And your daughter’s uteri too. After all, he is the Master of your family and knows best.
8. Buy an old school bus for family transport. It’s just good sense.
9. Buy lots of books and then burn them. Jesus will be proud.
10. Even if you don’t want to have sex and would rather claw your vag off than see your husband’s peen, HAVE SEX WITH YOUR HUSBAND IF HE WANTS IT. After all, only you can satisfy his urges. No pressure.