• Thu, Mar 27 - 12:00 pm ET

STFU Parents: The Various Ways To Announce You’re Pregnant On Facebook, Part II

If there’s one thing most parents can agree on in 2014, it’s the importance of an artfully crafted pregnancy announcement on Facebook. When I first tackled this unavoidable subject two years ago, we saw examples like the ever-popular Prego spaghetti sauce announcement (which still makes no sense), and talked about whether a person can have “too many” sonogram pictures on her page (answer: yes). Since then, the thought and effort that parents-to-be put into their pregnancy announcements has managed to ramp up on social platforms, because you can never have too much of a good thing. Plus, by now most parents have caught on to the fact that pregnancy announcements on social media are the first truly demonstrative acts of love for their child that the public will see, so it’s crucial to win over friends and family by the second trimester. Parents must communicate that yes, they’re having a baby, but also that they have a great sense of humor, are culturally in tune, hip to the latest trends, and really, REALLY want to celebrate this new life with their entire social network.

It’s not that I don’t understand the impulse behind announcing a pregnancy in a fun and creative way. I do, and plenty of Facebook users think a major announcement warrants custom flair. But sometimes people post things that make you wonder why. Or rather, who. Who art directed this? Who made these composition choices? Are attention-grabbing pregnancy announcements just harmlessly amusing, or are they arguably self-serving and obnoxious? Read the second installment of this ongoing “trend journalism” series, and decide for yourself.

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  • Jessifer

    I dunno, none of these really bothered me except for the morning sickness one. If my husband put up that photo on his FB, I’d drown him in that damn toilet.

    • Guest

      It is just super cheesy. The only one I’ve actually laughed at was mom barfing in 1st pic and then dad barfing in 2nd pic when he found out it was twins. Seems like an appropriate response.

    • zeisel

      now that would be funny! i think my husband would be green in the face too, if we were having multiples….

    • Robotic Socks

      Just tell people you were hungover

    • zeisel

      what they should have done is have the ‘husband’ bending over the toilet and the wife giving the thumbs-up, since ‘they’re pregnant’… get it! Do a spoof on the whole ‘we’re pregnant’..

    • CrazyFor Kate

      Or maybe have the wife holding the pregnancy test while the husband has fainted dead away.

  • keelhaulrose

    All this cutesy crap and here I was announcing it with “how the eff did I not notice I was pregnant for nearly four months?” I didn’t think to go cutesy.

  • Zorbs

    my least favourite is also one of the most unsubtle: the old change your profile pic to an ultrasound announcement.

    Warrants an instant unfriend in my FB-land.

    • Valerie

      Yeah. I don’t want to see the hazy black and white pic of anyone’s uterine innards.

    • Zorbs

      I’ve always said if we were meant to see the contents of one’s uterus before birth, the baby would be gestated outside the body.

    • rrlo

      Oh dear…

    • Robotic Socks

      What kind of a loser would change their profile pic with that???

    • Robotic Socks

      What kind of a loser would change their profile pic with that???

    • Valerie

      Awww, Socks! Congrats!

    • Robotic Socks

      Now I have to conduct tests to find out who’s the mother!

    • Valerie

      For now, its just you and your fetus, alone in the world. Are you going to name him/her R2D2?

  • Robotic Socks

    If you’re gonna do a movie poster announcement, wouldn’t this be more appropriate?

    http://sandym325.files.wordpress.com/2011/05/poster_knocked-up-3.jpg

    • Lamb

      That’s the one my friend did. I actually considered sending it in. It was pretty cute. I also appreciate that she didn’t do a tell all. They told their families and closest friends (those of us who were in the wedding) about two weeks before posting it on Fb.

  • Lee

    Lately I keep seeing announcements with pictures of dogs and Baby_______ Guard Dogs. It was cute the first time.

  • Kathleen

    The fake vomiting photo is terrible. “Hey, we’re so excited to have a baby we’re going to showcase how terrible my wife is feeling!” At least all the other submissions had an element of joy to them.

  • Valerie

    I did not announce either of my pregnancies on FB. I figured anyone who would give a shit would know about it pretty quick anyway. No need for Ralph from my 3rd grade class to know my husband had shot some sperm into my V.

    • Robotic Socks

      Did you announce who the father is, Bachelorette style?

    • Valerie

      Sort of. I had them line up in the hospital hallway and then we all looked the baby over together to decide who it most resembled.
      #aintnobodygottimeforpaternitytesting

    • Emily Wight

      Same. I was just like “here’s a baby. I had it.”

    • Valerie

      ..

    • http://www.ambiencechaser.com/ Elizabeth Licata

      OMG, you win.

    • http://ichasekids.com/ Litterboxjen

      Same here – only FB announcement of my first was her picture when I had her, along with the stats.

    • Harriet Meadow

      I guess that’s one way to go. Maybe it’s because I’m Facebook friends with family and people I actually consider to be my friends, but I thought “this is kind of a big deal for me and my family. They might want to know.” And I didn’t want to have to call them all individually, because that would take forever (I called my immediate family, of course). But all I did was a simple “I’m pregnant. Due on x date. Very excited.” Boom. Simple and easy. Maybe for the next one I’ll just wait until it’s born and see the shock that occurs when I post the “Here’s the baby” picture. LOL.

    • Valerie

      I’m not even on FB anymore- I hate it- so take me with a big grain of salt. :-) I am in pretty regular contact with my smallish family and my core group of friends so all that was left on my Friend list to tell that i was pregnant was acquantances from way too long ago to give a crap that I was having a baby. To each, their own.

    • evilstepmom

      I had at least one friend who made the announcement with “oops!” as the fb post.

    • LiteBrite

      I wasn’t even on FB when I was pregnant, so no announcements there for me either. I don’t mind when people do though, especially the ones who are long-distance friends and ones I don’t talk to very often.

      The only one of these that I thought was tacky was #6. My husband would get throat-punched if he did that to me.

    • Valerie

      When it comes down to it, I truly do not care if other people do it. I was never annoyed by it when I was on FB (although ultrasound photos did weird me out…they just seem too private to share, but whatever). Just for me, I am a pretty private person (which is part of what led me to leave FB to begin with) and in the pre-FB era, there was not 300 people I would have felt the need to call and tell I was pregnant. So I did not feel the need to be announcing it on FB, know what I mean? And it was kind of funny, we had our 10-year high school reunion and so many of the people there already knew everything about everyone but not everyone knew I had a child and that was pretty fun to announce in person. :-) There are few surprises anymore in life because everyone tells everything the moment it happens (or so it seems). I am kind of a retro girl and I value my privacy so I have my reasons for feeling this way. But if you want to do it, more power to you. It’s just not my thang. :-)

    • LiteBrite

      Ultrasounds weird me out too. A friend just had a baby, and she was posting her ultrasounds left and right. Whatever I suppose, but it was a little strange having that jump out at me in my newsfeed.

    • pixie

      I don’t mind one or two ultrasounds, but I’ve had one girl on my Facebook (recently deleted because I just got annoyed every time she posted something) who posted literally every single ultrasound picture, regular and 3D, in a giant album. Over a hundred ultrasounds and they all look practically the same. Each time she’d come back from an appointment (which she also made sure to tell Facebook about a week, 4 days, and 2 days prior, plus the night before and the day of before and after she got out) I would see on my feed [name] has just added 15 new pictures to [album named after her daughter].
      I suffered through it to collect it all and submit to STFUP.

    • practicallyperfectineveryway

      One or two are fine. Like, I’m happy for my pregnant friends. But to be honest all ultrasounds look the same to me. Post photos after it comes out.

    • Alicia Kiner

      My first pregnancy, I was sooo excited. I told everyone at work as soon as a I found out. Hell, I told most of them before I told my family. And then two weeks later, I had a miscarriage. Dealing with that privately is hard enough, but to face all these people that had been so happy for me, just made it worse. I learned then that certain things are kept private until there’s a need otherwise. I have also limited my Facebook friends to people who I would actually hold a conversation with in real life. If I see you out and about and you can’t be bothered to say hi to me, you don’t need to be my “friend.”

    • LiteBrite

      Same thing here: I told everyone and their mother I was pregnant then three weeks later had a miscarriage. The miscarriage was hard enough; it was having to talk about it weeks later (when people I hadn’t seen in awhile came up to me and said “Congratulations”) that was the really hard part.

      The next time I got pregnant I tried to keep it on the down low, but everyone guessed I was pregnant because I wasn’t drinking. Apparently I’m a raging alcoholic so when I don’t drink it’s noticeable.

    • shellylou

      I’m with you on the privacy thing. However, due to my job, I have to tell my workplace I am knocked up as soon as I discover it. If I have to tell my co-workers, I may as well tell everyone else.

    • Spitziehi

      You…I like your style.

    • Valerie

      Ha! Thanks!

    • ted3553

      I was nagged about it so much that I finally posted one pregnancy shot at about 30 weeks. I was fully clothed and speaking at an award ceremony because that’s about the only pregnancy picture I have. One picture on facebook and then one when he was born and I don’t feel like I missed out on sharing every moment with the facebook world.

  • JLH1986

    I saw on pinterest (I know I know) where one family reversed the fake vomit photo (presumably based on Blair’s arguments) pops was puking and mom was giving the thumbs up. I’m not sure it would translate as well though.

  • whiteroses

    I announced I was pregnant when we found out the gender. I merely said, “[Son's name] will be born on [due date].” I was too busy dealing with morning sickness to mess with cutesy.

  • AP

    #3 with the weird font is definitely Microsoft Word Art, right down to the fade…

    I *almost* submitted a former friend from middle school to STFUParents for her pregnancy announcement. She’s in the small-local-wedding-magazine business, and of course, her wedding was Feature #1. To announce her pregnancy, she laid her pregnancy test across the issue of the magazine that had her wedding splashed across the cover.

    I ended up not submitting it because it contained too much info about her professional identity and it wouldn’t have been nearly as ridiculous with the details blacked out.

  • MerlePerle

    I usually love this site, but it seems that just mentioning your kid on fb is now grounds for getting told to stfu.

    • Kendra

      I was thinking the same thing! The last few I’ve not been as into as I usually am.

    • sarahjp

      I 100% agree! I love a lot of the STFU Parents posts, and most of them are utterly ridiculous. But I’m now pregnant myself, for the first time, and I feel afraid to discuss anything unless I’m directly asked because I’m afraid of being acused of mommy-jacking. And trust me, I don’t want to talk about it all day either, but it’s kind of sad to think that I’m going to be mocked if I show a little excitement.

    • K.

      I also agree that the blog has gotten a bit thin lately.

      You can’t really mommy-jack on your own status update. It refers to commenting on OTHER people’s status updates, i.e., turning the conversation to your child rather than responding to the original comment.

    • kate

      Agree, these are STFU Lite.

    • ChopChick

      I totally agree. STFU used to be really funny, lately they just seem to mock anything which no regard for whether or not it actually is ridiculous. I just dont understand why a pregnancy announcement on facebook like these is so bad–particularly the shoes one. …How is that offensive!

    • Jessifer

      STFU used to be about parents who overshare. Now it seems like sharing anything at all is subject to ridicule.

    • EX

      I agree. It seems like lately people get mocked for things like being unoriginal, not just for over sharing. It does make it seem like, to not get mocked, you have to either a) never mention your kids or b) be extremely funny and creative when you do. There are many non-parenting related things in my newsfeed that are way more annoying than an unoriginal pregnancy announcement.

    • K.

      To be fair, I don’t think it was necessarily the shoes but the sign in back of them that relates guns to having a baby…

    • http://abasketcase.blogspot.com/ Basketcase

      Agreed.
      Yes, shoes have been “done to death” lately (hell, its even how I did it back in 2012), but they are still a simple, tasteful way of doing it. The gun statement thing on the blackboard was a little odd though.
      Definitely nowhere near overshare, and not even really overly tacky.

  • kay

    i’ve seen some “dress the dog up in a big brother/big sister shirt” pictures to announce and i kinda wanted to do that to the cats.

    mostly to prepare them for the soul-crushing that was to come. too bad i’m lazy!

  • Kendra

    I don’t know what is wrong with me but these don’t bother me at all. I’m not into the trendy birth announcements for myself, but I don’t find them to be smug or annoying. I did announce my pregnancy on facebook, because I don’t understand why you wouldn’t. I think it’s actually more strange when you don’t say anything, and then suddenly there are hospital baby pictures.

    • jane

      I agree – it always feels weird to me when it pops up on my feed like “really ready for this baby to arrive yesterday!” or “just had a baby and heading home!” It’s fine for people to not want to share, but I think announcing a pregnancy on social media is normal.

    • Kendra

      I mean, I guess it all boils down to what you use facebook for. I use FB as a means to see what old friends or family are up to, and to keep people in the loop on my life as well. So anytime someone just suddenly shows up with a baby picture, it feels so odd to me. Why would you leave out something so important in your life, when you’re posting 4 times a day about bad coffee and traffic lines.

    • nobunny

      My thinking at the time was, if you’re not close enough to me in real life to know I’m pregnant, there’s no need to discuss it on FB. What is there to say, really? I had a great pregnancy and even if I hadn’t, I wouldn’t have wanted to fill people’s feeds whining about morning sickness or whatever. I made one obscure reference to expecting when I was 7mos along, but enough people either never saw that post or didn’t get the reference that they were totally surprised by my pic from the hospital with baby in arms.

    • Kendra

      I understand what you’re saying. I just feel like that’s a really big moment in your life, so that should be something that you’d want to share. But, with that said, I don’t have people on facebook whom I’m not actually “friendly” with, so I don’t have anyone who is in the “not your business” category, as I feel that sort of defeats the purpose of it all. But, I do agree that whining and complaining about it via FB is definitely not a good idea.

    • Meghan

      This, so much this! If people are complaining about these announcements because they don’t want 300 strangers in their business, why do they friend these people? I only friend family and people I actually like, some if whom (like my family on a distant coast) I go years without seeing. Announcing makes total sense if you have social media filter self control.

    • rrlo

      A lot of people have family overseas etc. FB is a good way to make announcements rather than calling everyone up.

    • Katherine Handcock

      I think it’s less the announcing on Facebook, and more the cutesy ways to do it. I mean, can’t you just say, “X and I are expecting a baby! The due date is Y”?

      Although I did know one person who kept the news off Facebook until the baby was born, and reading the comments when she posted the picture of her and her little one was pretty entertaining.

    • Kendra

      In my opinion, the cutesy ways of doing it are fine. A lot of them are overdone ,sure. But, I just think people are excited.

    • rrlo

      I like the shoe one. I think it’s cute. I agree, these are not particularly obnoxious. Some people get really excited about having a baby.

    • EX

      Doesn’t everyone get really excited (or totally freaked out, or both) about having a baby? Especially their first?

    • notorious

      Only if they got pregnant on purpose…

    • EX

      Fair enough.

    • Linzon

      I just can’t hate on cutesy Facebook pregnancy announcements because I was really really really excited both times I was knocked up (once the shock wore off) so I can get where they’re coming from. The toilet one is gross, though. Down with toilets.

    • http://abasketcase.blogspot.com/ Basketcase

      Absolutely. Down with the toilet humour one!

    • Tk

      My FI announced on Facebook a week before we had put baby. He had a picture of the finished nursery, with a “thanks josh for helping me paint my little angels bedroom” it was very very cute. And then he got a million WTF replies because even some I his best friends didn’t know (I didn’t get very big). I thought it was freaking hilarious!

  • Renee J

    “Coming” May 2014. Hahaha

    I thought they meant the conception, too.

  • Lindsay

    Wait, I’m so confused by the second one. Are they going to turn the safety off when the baby comes? Is this the new wave in second amendment rights? Newborns with loaded guns?

    • wispy

      I was baffled by the safety thing. Did they mean the “safety” was off their sex life so sperm was able to shoot out the gun? I mean eww!

    • Rodiansinger

      That’s how I read it. They turned off the safety and let the bullets fly till one found it’s mark. There is one confirmed body at the crime scene, gender unknown. The name of the victim will be released in nine months to the next of kin before being made known to the public. They’ll keep everyone posted as the case progresses.

    • EX

      I was totally confused by that as well.

    • K.

      Um, I *think* that the “safety” thing refers to the guy being able to ejaculate without a “safety.”

      Klassy.

  • Not A Mandy

    Okay, gender reveal parties. Can we discuss these further? I’m currently due with my third a month after a college friend and his wife are due with their third. While we just tossed out that hubs was tired of the estrogen levels in his current household so he’s shaking things up with some testosterone, these people had a gender reveal party – complete with requests for diapers/wipes (Huggies natural only yo!) and straight cash for a “raffle.” After getting only 6 people to actually show up for this nonsense, they then did a gender reveal weekend on FaceBook where you voted by liking either a picture of mom’s belly in blue or mom’s belly in pink. They posted this nonsense on Friday afternoon; spent all day Saturday reminding people to vote; and then finally revealed it was a boy on Sunday. They are aware no one really cares that much about the gender of their baby right?

    • Alene

      That’s crazy. We had a barbecue in our back yard, which we do several times every summer anyway, and we cut open a cake we had made with pink frosting inside. Only immediate family and really close friends (three of them) were there. It was fun to experience it with everyone, but it was mainly an excuse to have beer, burgers and cake. We posted a picture of the inside of the cake on Facebook, but fully realized that outside our family nobody cares about our baby’s junk. We will probably do something similar this time, but again, the difference is it’s something we would already do, just with cake. I don’t think the gender reveal by itself is bad, but when people get gift grabby and smug about it, it’s time to STFU.

    • Sri

      I’m with you. Friends from high school had gender reveal parties like “pre-showers” (some even made it clear that it was so we knew what to get for the regular shower) and I HATED those. First, you’re not supposed to throw your own shower. Second, you don’t get 2 showers for 1 baby with all the same attendees.

      One set of friends, though, just wanted to have a dinner together where they also cut a cake at the end. They are actual friends, not “this person I knew once that would probably give me a gift,” plus, who doesn’t love cake. They did have a vote, but it’s mostly because we’re all competitive and we all think we’re always right.

    • Gina

      Hahaha! I kind of like the idea of posting a picture of the cake with the caption “in case you care about our baby’s junk.”

    • Jen

      Sounds like fun to me. I’ve no problem with reveal parties as a concept – most of the time the grandparents and immediate family members are interested and if it works to have them all over at the appropriate time and stuff them with cake and good food then why not have a bit of fun with it?

      Noting that the above is VERY different than yet another shower and a narcissistic belief that everyone in every level of acquaintance around you is as excited as you are. They aren’t. And they certainly aren’t excited about throwing even more presents your way. Congrats, it’s a whatever, have a fabulous time with that.

    • ted3553

      I would totally be ok with this at a barbecue. If I was already there and wasn’t expected to bring a gift and it wasn’t all about the reveal I would happily clap along when the cake was cut open.

    • Kendra

      These are people who I would tell to STFU. I’m fine with gender reveal parties. I didn’t have one because I felt one party (a baby shower) was plenty for me. And I’m totally fine with posting pictures from your gender reveal party on facebook, but what you’re describing seems like drawn out desperate need for attention.

    • CMP414

      Wow! Those people really need to get a life and they sound kinda greedy too. I seriously don’t think alot of people understand that while this is the most wonderful time in their lives no-one else is anything beyond mildly interested except maybe the grandparents and some aunts/uncles to be.

    • Alicia Kiner

      How did this become a thing? I mean I’ve heard of people doing it as part of the shower itself, but why 2 parties? It’s like bridal showers bachelorette parties and then weddings. So you decide to get married and because of some tradition or another, I have to get you 3 gifts (one for house, one for wedding night, couple gift). How did we do this to ourselves?

    • pixie

      A girl I had on Facebook who had THREE baby showers. I think one was for her family, one was for her husband’s family, and one was for her friends, and I don’t know if she planned them or they were planned for her, but I know she knew about them because she would post things like “2 days until baby shower #1″ “baby shower #1 today” “had a great time at baby shower 1, can’t wait for #2″ and so on… I don’t know why she didn’t just tell whoever wanted to organize the other ones that one was already being organized and have the three people work as a team.
      (Note: I’ve recently deleted her because since she got pregnant pretty much all she ever posted about were her appointments and sonograms and all the things she bought. And then when the baby was born in january all she ever posted about was her baby and like fifty pretty much identical pictures of the baby per day and videos and being similar in general to a number of posts that have ended up on STFUP before)

    • Dramatic Anti-Climax

      There isn’t necessarily a problem with more than one baby shower, as long as she didn’t host them, and as long as everyone was only invited to one shower. Sometimes timing doesn’t work out well for just one big shower.

    • pixie

      That’s true, but it just seemed a little much. I don’t know if there was any cross over with the people invited for each one and I’m pretty sure she didn’t host any of them, but it was having three completely separate ones that struck me as odd. Two would have made more sense if not everyone could make it on the same day. Perhaps it was also taking pictures of every single gift she received and about ten different angles of the cake/various food and posting them to Facebook that also bugged me, lol.

    • Natasha B

      A few of my friends had more than one baby shower, but they were more along the lines of MIL/Mother throwing one with all family members, and then a close friend throwing one for all friends -which was way more fun and there was booze and such.

    • Justme

      I almost hesitate posting this…but we had four baby showers. One that two of my oldest and dearest friends threw me, one from my mother’s tight knit group and then two work showers (we are both teachers).

    • pixie

      I think what really did it for me was the over-posting of the showers, both before and after. It’s really fine if you have more than one or two baby showers, but constantly posting about them on Facebook I guess is what really annoyed me (multiple posts about each one before and after and the “haul” pictures). That coupled with the over-posting about everything, it appeared to be a really big humble brag.

    • Justme

      I can definitely see that. Our four showers were honestly unavoidable and more importantly, they were more about social gatherings than gift grabs. One of my friends was living across the country when I got married so she missed all the wedding festivities and was determined to “make up for it” (her words, not mine) and threw me a big, fun, crafty shower. My mom’s friends have known me since before I was born and that’s the tradition amongst them – to shower their friends’ daughters for weddings and babies. And then with us both being teachers? We’re never a group to turn down a chance to eat cake and drink punch.

      TL; DR – I think intent goes a long way when it comes to stuff like this.

    • K.

      So…We had a gender-reveal baby shower. Meaning, we had a co-ed baby shower and at the shower, we cut a cake that had been dyed blue or pink to reveal to ourselves, as well as our guests, the sex of the baby. We just thought it’d be sort of a fun moment during the party.

      Just to be clear–we didn’t do a gender reveal SEPARATE from the baby shower; we just revealed the gender at the shower. It was a compromise between me (who wanted to find out after birth) and my husband (who wanted to know immediately).

      Is that type of thing ok or did we alienate people?

    • Dramatic Anti-Climax

      I was planning on doing the same thing (just got sick of waiting since the baby shower is 2 weeks from my due date!). I don’t think it would alienate anyone, because there aren’t 2 parties. That’s what bugs me about the whole thing.

    • K.

      I think it’s always weird to have two parties for a birth if they’re the same social circles.

    • Valerie

      I think that’s great and adds an element of surprise to the baby shower. :-)

    • K.

      Whew.

      (I put that forward because I thought, “Ew. Announcing the baby’s sex on FB is fine, but I don’t give a flying fuck what gender your baby is enough to submit a vote.” And then I went, “Oh waiiiit a minute…”)

  • val97

    I hate the pee stick photos more than anything. And then a biblical passage too? Unfriend immediately.

    • Emilia

      I’d unfriend anyone who posted bible passages, period.

  • RW

    I love the last one!

    I actually just did a Facebook announcement this week. Submitted for your approval/derision:

    If you can’t read the fine print, it says “you are hereby required to vacate the premises within 30 weeks as a new tenant is expected to take possession on or about October 2nd, 2014.
    Sincerely, The family Planning and Development Department”

    Why it’s so humorous to us is that a) my husband is actually a planner, and b) we have 2 rental properties.

    • Tee

      Aw, I think that’s cute! Simple and fun way to announce that your family is growing. Congratulations on your new baby!

    • RW

      Thanks!

    • PrairieCoast

      Sorry, but since you asked, I vote lame. Only because I’ve seen various versions of this about five times in the last couple of months.

    • RW

      Fair enough. Another friend said she had the same thing from another friend in her timeline. No one I knew had done it before, but I’m the first to admit I stoled it from the interwebz by googling “baby announcements” and searching until I found something I liked!

    • lena247

      I’ve never seen it before, but I vote lame. All these picture posts and stuff are lame to me. Most normal people I know just do a status like “excited to announce that Jim and I are expecting a baby in December!”.

    • Natasha B

      I think it’s cute :)

    • http://abasketcase.blogspot.com/ Basketcase

      This is what half a dozen of my friends have done lately too – seems to be the newest trend :)
      I like it – if you dont actually read the piece of paper, you could totally scroll past it thinking its just another baby photo.

    • RW

      Yeah, I had never seen it before I went searching, so my hope was it would be relatively unique – at least to my friends. Alas, I am always at the back of the trends…

      My mother lives over 8 hours away, so I sent her the photo by way of announcement without saying anything else. I was on the pone with her when she received it and she totally didn’t get it. She just said “oh cute!” and went on with what she was doing. I asked if she read it, and she was all “yeah, I get it. Eviction from the crib. Cute!” Then my sister pipes in “no, ma – READ IT.” Hilarious double take and grandmother-giddiness ensues.

  • arielmarie

    The pee stick always gets me. I promise I’ll believe you, even if you didn’t show me the item you were peeing on 2 minutes ago.

    • Alicia Kiner

      I know people who kept those as keepsakes in their baby memory boxes. ew. keep it to yourself. trust me, your kid isn’t going to want to see it when he or she is old enough to understand wtf it is

    • Williwaw

      We never showed the pee sticks (I did 2, just to confirm), but a few months ago I found them in my husband’s desk drawer, mixed in with the pens and pencils (our kid is now 2 years old, by the way), and I was all WTF? Didn’t we throw those out nearly 3 years ago? I think we can safely get rid of them now as we do not need to prove there was a pregnancy.

      (An aside: I recall that the pregnancy test instructions claimed that the test was not valid if read more than 10 minutes after you peed on it. Really? ‘Cause it’s been 3 years, and the test still looks positive to me.)

    • Tikitavia

      It’s not valid because it tends to show false positives after a while. So you can keep a positive test for a long time, but a negative will often turn positive.

    • K.

      iknorite?

      If you say you’re pregnant, I’ll believe you. I don’t need proof.

  • http://wtfihaveakid.blogspot.ca/ jendra_berri

    Holding something you’d peed on over an open Bible with underlined passages is the height of smug and bleh. This is someone I would not want to know.
    And I reallllly don’t like ha-ha vomit pictures where the guy is all proud of himself. See this suffering? I did that! Me!
    I think announcing a pregnancy over Facebook is A-ok. I also don’t mind ultrasounds, so long as it’s just one and not 3D. It’s not like you actually can see the nuts and bolts of the actual uterus. I’ve never understood finding them gross. There’s just not enough information there to be icked out about. Show me an actual placenta and that would be awful.

    • Kendra

      I don’t mind any of the ultrasound pictures. I was beginning to think I was the only one who didn’t think it was gross. And I’m super squeamish too. Strange.

    • rrlo

      Why are ultrasound pictures gross? I don’t get it.

    • Kendra

      I HAVE NO IDEA! There are always posts on STFU and comments supporting it that ultrasound pictures are gross. I can’t figure it out. I don’t think they are gross at all.

    • biggerthanthesound

      Because they are blurry and weird blobs with bones in them.

    • Katherine Handcock

      I’ll admit, I posted an album that included multiple 3D ultrasound pics. In my defense, I’m pretty sure literally every person on my Facebook had asked when I was posting the pictures! I did try to keep it to a relatively non-weird picture for the cover shot, though – you had to go into the album to find the weird-alien-baby pictures.

    • K.

      I don’t mind anyone posting an album of an ultrasound. I mean, if I don’t want to look at them, I don’t have to click.

      I DO mind people posting albums of say, bloody show and the crowning head. Seriously–if it involves a bodily fluid outside of the body and/or nudity, then please–don’t show us.

    • EX

      With my first I posted 3D ultrasound pictures and thought nothing of it – in real life I think everyone I ever knew who was pregnant showed me their ultrasound pictures and I thought they were cool so it never occurred to me to not scare them. Then I discovered STFU Parents and now I post hardly anything. Sometimes I wish I’d never heard about STFU Parents. Ignorance is bliss.

    • Natasha B

      I’m kinda with you there ;) but I don’t have FB anymore so I think I’m safe

    • Linzon

      We did post the ultrasound picture for our first kid because he looked like Skeletor.

    • Jessica

      I announced my pregnancy on Facebook by posting an ultrasound from 10w with the caption “Wonder who the little bug resembles most – [DH] or me?” My favorite comment was from a co-worker who wrote “Hopefully not the mailman!” LOL.

  • Guest

    I do love the last one. Now that is the type of announcement I could get on board with. My close friends never did an announcement on fb which I found to be annoying because its nothing nothing nothing tons of baby photos. Other randoms on my feed have done some of these and while they were cutesy they were very sweet. I give them a pass because they’re excited anyway. If you unfriend people over how they announce their joyous news then you weren’t friends to begin with. Anyone who says anything along the lines of “instant/automatic unfriend” is far more irritating than the stuff in this article IMO.

    • Kendra

      I agree with that whole post.

  • Katherine Handcock

    I love Lauren’s announcement! I hope I would be that cool in an alternate universe where it happens to me.

    The prevalence of cutesy pregnancy announcements backfired on me big time this year: I posted a picture of my daughter on her birthday wearing a shirt that said “I am 3″ and titled it, “Hey everyone, guess what?” Apparently for a bunch of my friends, the photo wouldn’t load, so naturally they assumed I was pregnant. There were a lot of “No, really, it’s just Alicia’s birthday” messages that day…

  • cmichelle

    We tied our announcement to the local music festival where everything was labeled as a “fort.” Babyfort felt like it fit in with the weekend’s theme, especially since my husband’s band was playing. It was a little cutesy, but I also didn’t feel like it was the same thing I’ve seen all over Pinterest ad nauseum (e.g. empty shoes, movie posters, and the like).

    With family, stepfamily, in-laws, and spread out friends, it was easier to announce on Facebook than send out multiple text messages or round up email addresses. It was also a nice way to have the pregnancy out in the open quickly. That first few months of not telling people is pretty isolating, especially with a spouse who sells beer and wine for a living.

  • Kendra

    On a somewhat unrelated but equally annoying note, can someone please start a STFU Couples site? I have several things to submit here. I would much rather see any of these things than a lively debate of who loves who the “mostest” (yes, this is on my FB right now).

    • Frannie

      I just want an STFU brides site. The baby vomit posts I can deal with. The “Ten more days to RSVP to my wedding!” (that most people aren’t invited to) posts are what I can’t take anymore. I would start the site myself, but IDK where I’d get submissions. They make ME want to vomit.

    • Kendra

      Yes! I would submit to that too! “UGH! They sent me Sunset Lily Lilac #1 fabric instead of Sunset Lily Lilac #2! My life is over!!!!!!!!!”

    • practicallyperfectineveryway

      please start this I need this website. I’m at the age where lots of people are getting engaged and married (the “met in college” crowd anyway).
      There is a tumblr for stfumarrieds but it’s not got as good commentary as STFUP.

    • potato

      Wish granted. (Not by me.)
      http://www.stfucouples.com/

    • Kendra

      Thank you!!!! My life just got a little more joy in it!

    • Valerie

      We could do a whole feature on couples who share one FB account. GAG.

    • AM

      I have a couple like that on my FB. The worst part is that the wife announced not long ago that they were divorcing… yet they still continue to post this sappy shit. I mean, you don’t have to shout from the rooftops that you’re divorcing but putting on this kind of show for people in order to pretend that nothing is wrong is fucking ridiculous.

    • Kendra

      Seriously. I tend to me so much more skeptical of a relationship if they are being super lovey-dovey on facebook than if they never said anything about one another. This couple I know literally has conversations on facebook about how they are each the “best boy/girl friend ever” and I’m always over here like “or you could get off your phones and talk about it face to face”.

    • anon87

      Someone posted a little further down the link to the STFU Couple site. But there’s also stfubelievers.tumblr.com (only really far out submissions), thebicker.net (formerly stfuconservatives.tumblr.com). And of course lamebook.com for the worst of humanity.

    • Natasha B

      Yes! So much! Also a STFU Pet Parents-I don’t need to see every time your new puppy-kind has an accident.

  • Tara

    Honestly, none of these are that bad. The movie one is pretty dumb, and I’ll never think the vomiting one is funny, but nothing really cringe-inducing this time. I’m always jealous of people that don’t even know they’re pregnant until half-way through. I would love to skip the first half of pregnancy.

    • EozS

      I agree, none of these really bothered me. The pee stick / bible one isn’t really up my alley, but these just seem like run-of-the-mill facebook baby announcements to me.

      And I totally agree. I’d love to find out when a baby comes out after some mild cramps. But that would mean I’d have smoked and drunk alcohol and coffee throughout the pregnancy so maybe that’s not a good thing.

  • Hibbie

    That last one is “I PREG” done right.

    • Reash

      I would so love to announce a pregnancy by saying “I PREG!”, but I know no one on my friends list would get it.

  • TrudyML

    Ah, Miss Berri! It’s Trudy here! Hi!

  • CMP414

    People go to such extremes sometimes. With my first I just posted that Baby P would be coming that February. With my second I was a tad more creative (for me). I posted a pic of my 2 year old wearing an “I’m going to be a big sister” shirt. I’m glad I did the pic when I did she wound up getting marinara sauce on it that night and the stains never came out.

  • EX

    The way the faces were blacked out in the “it’s a boy!” announcement made me think there was something really freaky going on under there.

  • Blu

    A friend of mine & her husband just did a professional gender reveal photo shoot. Really?! People need a professional photo shoot for that?

    • EozS

      Does one need a professional photo shoot for anything, really?

  • Rachel

    A few years ago a friend posted a photo of her pee-stick on facebook and tagged everyone that she wanted to tell. Suddenly there was a photo of a positive pregnancy test on my own timeline with my name attached to it!!!!!! Please don’t do this to your single friends who have mothers desperate to become grandmothers!

    • Ursi

      I’d be furious if a friend did that to me. My mother would never get over it. It would be “remember that time I thought you were finally going to have a child and then my dreams were crushed?” for the rest of my life.

    • EozS

      You mean you aren’t already?

  • Laura

    I have an FB friend (from junior high) who posted pictures of syringes full of fertility drugs that she was about to stick in herself, then pictures of the fertilized embryos a few weeks later, then the pee-stick, then sonograms, etc. It was… more than I needed to know…

    • CrazyFor Kate

      Ooh, I have a high school friend who is now doing the same thing. Like, IVF is an extremely difficult process and of course you’ll want support, but the entire world does not need to hear about dye getting injected into your pelvis.

  • Ariel

    Surprised there aren’t any cringeworthy pregnancy test announcements. Reminds when my cousin posted her positive pregnancy tests on Instagram, literally just after she took the test. Hadn’t even made an appointment to see a doctor yet! Needless to say, she was very upset with everyone because, her mom and aunt found out via family gossip. I forsee some submissions in the near future…

    Also, makes me grateful most of my friends stick to a simple “I’m pregnant” or “X and I are having a baby” status update.

  • CrazyFor Kate

    On a slightly different note, has anyone seen that thing going around FB lately where you post a “baity” status (usually announcing a major life change and/or controversial statement) and if you like the status, you’ve been taken in and have to put it on your wall for X number of days? It’s literally the stupidest thing ever. My cousin’s wife posted that she was pregnant, everyone got excited for their unexpected late-in-life baby, and then it turned out that she was doing the dumb meme. A lot of people actually got angry over it. There are some things you just don’t say unless they’re true.

    • pixie

      Yeah, I saw one of those. The pregnant one. It was something like “Well it’s official, I’m pregnant”.

      Whenever I see something like that I’ll google it to see if it’s part of one of those “games”.

    • Bandgeek77

      Yeah, one of my friends posted that she just won $7000 off a scratchie. I had no idea it was some stupid game. I got suckered, just like several others. You know what I did when she sent a private message telling me the rules and whatnot. Jack squat, that’s what. I don’t like being forced into stupid games that are supposed to “raise awareness” for breast cancer or some such nonsense. How does that do that? Wouldn’t it be simpler to state that “Funding breast cancer research is important to me. If you’d like to learn more, go to…” I just don’t get it.

    • RW

      Wow, what a dumb game. That goes right back to grade school “Haha! You believed what I said! Stoopid!” Uh, yeah? Why would I assume you’re lying to me?

    • notorious

      Oh my gosh. My cousin posted that she was a lesbian for that meme, and it had hilarious results (not really, a lot of people were very confused).

    • Ginger S

      There’s tons of those chain letter statuses. And yes, one of my friends posted a fake pregnancy one the other day. The only time I saw one of those get remotely interesting was when the husband wasn’t in on it and commented on it like “uh, WHAT??!! EXCUSE ME?!”

  • Kay_Sue

    I honestly don’t remember how I announced my youngest on Facebook (didn’t have it for the older one…). I know that I did, I know that it was simple (or I’m sure I’d remember it). Hm. #MomFail #MaybeNotAFail

  • Music Mamma

    No one wants to see anything you peed on. There, I’ve said it.

    • lemon floor wax

      If you have to have this said to you, there is no hope.

  • Barkybark

    I just saw something at work: One of my female colleagues put a sonagram pic in a frame which had the words, “my preborn granddaughter!”

  • Joye77

    Any use of Ron Burgundy to help announce your pregnancy gets a thumbs up from me!

  • Liz

    I still haven’t “announced” my pregnancy on Facebook and I’m 32 weeks. I just don’t see the need. Anyone who matters already knows I’m pregnant. Old high school classmates can find out when I start spamming them with photos of my adorable baby.

  • Tisa Berry

    My church’s youth pastors announced their baby with a movie trailer. It was actually really cute!

  • Sparksinky

    My favorite response to a gender reveal party: “How do they know what gender it is yet?”
    That ALWAYS bugs me too. It needs to at least be called a sex reveal party because to put it simple, sex means male or female parts and gender means a feminine, masculine or nonbinary distinction. So basically, you’re not throwing a gender reveal, you’re throwing a penis or vagina reveal. I mean, celebrate your baby’s genitals if that’s what you really want, but I’m going to think you’re a weirdo.

    • EozS

      OMG… they are babies… let’s not get so complicated at this stage.

    • RW

      Forget that – I’m totally with you! My degree is in sociology, and I’m neurotic to the point of crossing out ‘gender’ on surveys/forms and writing ‘SEX’ in its place. In university I would check off the ‘M’ – half my friends maintain I should have been born a man anyway, so apparently I’m masculine, LOL. People only mistakenly use the word gender because they are afraid to say the dirty word SSSSSeXXXXX.

  • goofyjj

    My friend did a picture of a bun in an oven. Then has yet to mention her pregnancy again. It’s been several months. I know where she’s traveled, some job stuff, her runs. But no constant preggo updates. I love her.

  • Kati

    #4. Somebody, somewhere had got to be polishing up a stone to use against this lowly woman who dared defile the holy word with her urine-stained stick, right?! Sorry, just found this picture amusing for very sacrilegious reasons. Because I’m awful.

  • ksu_artist1

    I think I sprained something eye-rolling so hard at #4 with the pee stick on the bible. But #6 more than made up for it.

  • Amanda

    The only ones that really bother me are the ones that show me the pregnancy test – no one wants to see the pee stick people. Beyond that whatever is fine with me. I only had facebook with our youngest and I think we announced it by sharing a picture of the youngest at the time and underneath it said “4 of 5″ It was fun to see which friends caught on first and which ones eventually had to have it explained to them LOL

  • shellylou

    A sorority sister of mine just posted a cute announcement. They’re from the Mobile, New Orleans area, so they posted a shot of the standard warning on King Cakes: “Caution: Baby inside!” with a comment saying her and her husband should have listened to the warning. I don’t think I am the only person out there that prefers a little originality with the announcement. I don’t want to see y’alls pee stick or ultrasound.

  • Jen

    whaddya think of my pregnancy announcement? I also have one that chronicles my pregnancy week by week. :)

    http://youtu.be/sM-wbAjkYQk