• Thu, Mar 20 - 2:00 pm ET

10 Bad Ass Baby Shoes That Are An Adorable Waste Of Money

If you bought shoes for your baby, you probably shouldn’t tell anyone about it. As your baby wears these adorable shoes without actually walking on them down the street, and you get compliments from passers-by, you can just lie and say that someone bought them for you as a baby shower gift. You would never be that frivolous and reckless, never.

No one in their right mind spends cash money on baby shoes. Babies can’t even walk, and their feet are really fat. Once you stuff their little sausage foot into a super adorable shoe, they’ll probably kick it off in a fit of rage 0.5 seconds later. Not to mention the fact that baby shoes cost some exorbitant price, like 20 bucks or even 60 bucks for a baby that will literally never walk in them. In short, baby shoes are the most ridiculous and lucrative prank that has ever been played on new parents.

With that being said, you probably have a closet full of baby shoes. You probably bought the majority of them yourself from Baby Gap like a chump or got them for a “steal” on eBay. Remember, don’t tell anyone that you spent half your paycheck on baby shoes. Just stuff your baby’s sausage feet into them and blame it on a loving grandma, and no one will be the wiser.

Baby shoes are cute and totally RIDIC. Here are 10 of the best baby shoes that money should never buy:

1. This Lacey Ridiculousness.

shoe12. These Elaborate Leather Booties.

shoe23. Too Much This.

shoe34. Beautiful Bows = Hours Of Stress.

shoe45. Enough With The Rhinestones Already.

shoe56. Baby Air Force Ones.

shoe67. Baby Dior.

shoe78. Baby Chanel.

shoe89. Liza Minnelli Trapped In A Baby’s Body.

shoe910. Baby Boots With The Fur.

shoe10

(Image: Pinterest)

Share This Post:
  • Robotic Socks
    • Valerie

      I feel like this goes against everything you stand for. Considering your surname is Socks. Well, at least it is for today.

    • Robotic Socks

      Hm… I do like bootys…

  • evilstepmom
    • Bethany Ramos

      Hahaha I bought my toddler boots for Christmas. #godblesstexas

  • http://mother--bored.tumblr.com/ Aimee Ogden

    Baby shoes are bad enough to begin with, but some of these are SO elaborate. I can’t imagine putting them on over and over again as they go flying across the room … or rather, I can imagine, and it sounds ridiculous.

  • Jennifer Freeman

    The first two pairs are amazeballs! They are seriously gorgeous and I would never, ever purchase them for my own children, but dang wouldn’t they make the most adorable baby gift EVAR! My sister needs to have some kids so I can buy these.

    • itpainsme2say

      If you’re into crochet you can make some similar to #1 they have good patterns on revelry

  • http://www.twitter.com/ohladyjayne allisonjayne

    A friend gave us these at our baby shower. Adorable, but truthfully, the kid only wore them like 3 times. My kid had bare feet or socks until she was old enough to walk.

    • Bethany Ramos

      Ahhhhhmazing.

  • candyvines

    I want the second pair in my size. So pretty! Babies also do not need bathrobes.

    • jane

      Disagree. Babies only need bathrobes. What they do not need is pants.

    • Kay_Sue

      Do any of us *really* need pants? I don’t think so.

    • jane

      Why aren’t you my real life friend?

    • Robotic Socks

      Do like me and pretend she is

      O_o

    • Valerie

      Socks and Kaaaay sittin in a tree. T-Y-P-I-N-G.
      Not enough letters to make it jive. But you catch my drift.

    • Williwaw

      We had the most awesome shark bathrobe for our kid.

  • pixie

    I kinda want numbers 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, & 10 to be made in my size.

  • Iwill Findu

    I will fess up I bought baby shoes but I got them from the thrift store 25-75 cents, clearly I washed them first. I love thrift stores. Also I always put shoes on my daughter it takes her more time to get her socks off that way.

    • Psych Student

      Brilliant!

  • Rachel Sea

    I love the baby socks that look like shoes. You get, like, 7 pairs of Chuck’s or Mary Janes for $20.

  • Missy

    A friend of mine got #1 as a gift for her daughter’s baptism. That is one of the only things I can think of that those would be practical at.

    I have some soft shoes for the parasite. I’ve been told that it helps them get used to things on their feet. The hard bottom ones are a little impractical for infants. My cousin also uses them on her 1 year old when she was crawling because she was getting sores on her feet from dragging them. So there’s that, too.

  • Guest

    I will take 3, 4, 6, and 10.

  • Valerie

    “Little tiny baby in the boots with the furrr *WITH THE FURRR* all the other babies lookin at herrrrr!”

    • Bethany Ramos

      Words out of my mouf!

    • Valerie

      We would just have all the funs if we went out drinking together. I can tell.

    • Bethany Ramos

      I know!! I really want this to happen.

    • Valerie

      Mommyish Meetup 2014
      Make it happen.

    • Robotic Socks

      Clothing optional?

    • Valerie

      We know Pixie would be down.

    • Bethany Ramos

      Yes!!

    • Robotic Socks
    • Valerie

      Right now, I am picturing you as Stifler from American Pie. I don’t know why.

    • Robotic Socks

      …I am picturing you as Stif…

      quoted out of context

    • Valerie

      That right there. What you just said. Maybe that’s why.

    • Robotic Socks
    • Valerie

      That face Cadence is making is def the face I make when reading some of your comments.

    • kay

      When my baby wears pants with the ruffle booty and her tiny boot type things (they’re soft so more like slippers, and harder to get off than socks) I sing about how she had the ruffle bottom jeans, boots with the fur, and we dance. She LOVES it.

      Some day she’s going to realize all the songs I sing to her and roll her eyes SO HARD

  • LadyClodia

    Neither of my boys had real shoes until they were around 1. I had soft sole slipper shoes or socks with treads on them before that. Although, even those soft sole shoes can be ridiculously expensive too. I suspect, though, that if I had a girl I would not have been able to resist buying baby shoes. Seriously, #4 pair is super cute.

  • SA

    #9 – I can only imagine the baby choking on the feathers as they gnaw on their foot.

  • Natasha B

    *guilty* of the boots with the furrrrr. In my defense, she wouldn’t leave socks on, and it’s freezing in MN in winter, and they were soft soled sparkly silver leather lined with white fur. And they were soooooo freaking adorable.

  • Zettai

    Come on, baby Air Force Ones are CLASSIC! I wish I knew a baby right now so I could buy them for him.

  • Alanna Jorgensen

    My kid had baby bunny slippers. :) Because bunnies!

    • Bunny Lou

      I approve this message.

  • itpainsme2say

    My weakness is baby shoes like I have to stop and look every time. My kids are going to have cons on their feet wether they like it or not.

  • gothicgaelicgirl

    any future kids of mine will have baby Cons just cos they’re the cutest damn thing I’ve ever seen!
    When you can slip two fingers into baby skater shoes, I kinda go all squealy!

  • C.J.

    I loved baby shoes! I had way too many pairs of them. They even had shoes to come home from the hospital in. My youngest had #6 but with a pink swoosh. I will not admit out loud how much I paid for them. She had extra fat feet and I had to go to a speciality store to get running shoes wide enough for her. In my defence she was trying to walk when I bought them.

  • Alex Lee

    PSHHHH.

    Print your own shoes. Custom fit.

  • http://www.dollieme.com/ Sam Craig

    All baby shoes are amazing! See more adorable shoes that your baby wears and looks beautiful!!

  • Psych Student

    Ok, so all I can think is “those widdle shoes are covering up da tiny widdle baby toesez and how will I EAT DEM!!!!!!” (There is every possibility that I want children just for the little baby toes).