• Fri, Mar 7 - 2:00 pm ET

10 Gun Cakes For Kids That You Can Eat Without A Background Check

Hey! Your kid is turning 12 or eight or seven months or whatever, and you’d like a fresh idea for his birthday cake, wouldn’t you? Nothing says, “I love you baby!” better than an instrument of death, made from fondant or delicious frosting and plastered on a cake. Make sure you serve up some refreshing fruit punch that could also double as copious amounts of blood spewing forth from a wound. Paint some acorns to look like shell-casings and we’ve got ourselves a party!

1.  The “So Yummy That No One Will Use It For Mass Destruction” Cake

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cdn.cakecentral

Nothing says “tween party” like an assault rifle!

2.  The “Celebrate With A Bang!” Cake

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Annette Galloway/ Pinterest

Glad you’ve made it to twelve and now we can “arm” you with deliciousness!

3. The “Stand Your Ground, Dustin!” Cake

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Debbie Sibley/ Pinterest

This gun was made with love, Dustin. We’re so proud of you! Sorry about your black teeth.

4.  The “First-Degree Yum!” Cake

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cakechooser.com

Nothing says “milestones” like target practice!

5. The “Locked, Loaded And Delicious!” Cake

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Linda Paquet Durey/ Pinterest

This is a Nerf gun everyone. Relax!

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  • Kay_Sue

    #8 is a paintballing cake. He’s not dead, he just got pinged with a paintball.

    Which would really hurt in the face like that. *shudders*

    #9 may be another Nerf cake–my kids have Nerf ammunition like that.

    I’m not going to lie, I wouldn’t make them for my kids…but I would not mind one or two of these for an adults only party for my husband. He’d get a kick out of it.

    • Crusty Socks
    • Kay_Sue

      My cake making skills are definitely not on that level.

    • Valerie

      My cake-making skills can barely work an Easybake Oven. I’m sure you’ve got me licked. Licked. Like frosting? Because we are talking about cakes. Get it?

    • Kay_Sue

      I’m chuckling so hard.

      We had two birthday “events” for my oldest son this year–one, on his actual birthday, was just his favorite dinner and a cake I made. The other was a party with his friends. Only close family was at the first–my parents and sisters and my grandmother…and they all decided that my cake looked like Hagrid’s from Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone…and not the cute Pinterested up ones you find. The actual looked like a half-giant had sat on it kind. *sighs*

  • tk88

    I find the idea of a kid with a gun cake horrifying but…two of these are for paintball and two are nerf guns/bullets, which are fine. And except for the ones that have an age on it, how do we know all these cakes are for children?

    • Kay_Sue

      I missed that the first one was a paintball gun too.

  • Lee

    I wonder if the recipient of cake #2 is named Gage and is turning 12 or if 12 gage refers to the gun. I like it if it is being punny.

    • Williwaw

      I bet Gage’s parents just couldn’t wait till his 12th birthday so they could have a 12 gauge cake.

    • chickadee

      #2 is a paintball cake also, so if Gage is 12, he likes paintball. If ‘gage’ refers to the gun, then someone doesn’t know how to spell.

  • http://mother--bored.tumblr.com/ Aimee Ogden

    P. sure the first one is also a paintbull gun cake, not an assault rifle.

    Paintball and Nerf ones aside … I understand that some people want to have guns in their house, and train their kids to handle those guns responsibly. (I don’t agree with it at all, but I understand it.) But I DON’T understand the idea that it’s all right to teach kids that guns are fun, cool props, or playthings (see also the baby photographed with a gun recently). I think part of responsible gun ownership should be making sure you don’t glorify the things such that your kid wants to take it out to play with it or show off to friends.

    • libraryofbird

      But shooting (appropriate things) is fun. Responsible gun owners should teach childern that guns are dangerous but they can be fun too. There are a lot of dangerous things in the world that when given proper respect can be enjoyable.

    • http://mother--bored.tumblr.com/ Aimee Ogden

      I’m sorry, but I don’t think teaching your toddler that guns are fun is a good idea (one of those cakes has a 1 on it). I think drinking is fun and I plan to teach my kids about responsible drinking when they’re older, but I sure wouldn’t make my kids a wine bottle cake when they’re still in diapers. And I don’t think beer is that much more dangerous than a handgun that it justifies teaching kids that one is off limits and the other is not.

    • libraryofbird

      Fair enough, I don’t think toddlers should be armed either (or drinking). But like drinking if families have guns teaching age appropriate gun safety is not a bad thing.

    • Momma425

      I would totally let my kid eat a cake with a wine bottle on it. It’s a cake, and she is five and loves cake. Giving her a piece of cake with a picture of a wine bottle on it would mean nothing different to her than giving her a piece of cake with a balloon on it- she would be excited about frosting. I wouldn’t get her a wine bottle cake for her birthday because she is five, and not interested in wine.

      I went to a friend’s bachelorette party when my daughter was 18 months old and brought home leftover penis cupcakes. I gave my daughter a bite of one. Now, maybe that will have a lasting effect on her when she’s a teenager and she will forever be a whore because I gave her frosting in the shape of balls before she could talk- or MAYBE she didn’t care what shape the cupcake was and enjoyed it for what it was- delicious sugar.

      Hey, while we’re at it- what did all of your birthday cakes look like? Since they have a lasting effect and teach all sorts of life lessons and all…..

    • Rachel Sea

      I had my first bb gun when I was 7, and it was massively fun, but I also respected that it could hurt someone or kill a small animal, and so I was careful with it. Competition shooting can start in childhood, and that involves a LOT of care and respect.

      Enjoying guns, and acting irresponsibly with guns, don’t have to be the same, and assuming they are is illogical.

    • http://mother--bored.tumblr.com/ Aimee Ogden

      But I think that they enjoying and irresponsible handling DO amount to the same thing for small children, thought not necessarily older children or adults. One of those cakes is for a one-year-old and I absolutely don’t think the diaper crowd is able to be well enough trained to respect and properly handle a gun as you were.

    • Kay_Sue

      I kind of think that one was a play on his name though. So maybe they thought it was punny?

    • http://mother--bored.tumblr.com/ Aimee Ogden

      Hmm, maybe, although why you’d go with spent shells rather than a deer or a hunting hat, or painting the fondant hunter orange, idk?

    • Kay_Sue

      Some people are not as creative with their motifs?

    • Rachel Sea

      I think the one year old cake gets a pass. The decor on those is for the parents, not the kid.

    • Paul White

      If your kid likes shooting or guns in general, what’s wrong with having a cake that reflects their interest? These aren’t real guns FFS.

    • http://mother--bored.tumblr.com/ Aimee Ogden

      Well, while I have trouble believing that a 1-year-old is so into guns that he wants them on his cake, the fact that they aren’t real guns is part of the problem. It’s hard for small kids to understand the difference between “this gun is OK to have fun with, but this one is not” – especially considering the lax attitude a lot of people in this country, unfortunately, have toward safe storage of guns and ammo. Kids get killed all the time playing with unsecured firearms – more than 50 last year in the USA. I just don’t think toddlers can be instructed well enough in gun safety and in differentiating “fun” from “dangerous” to be safe gun enthusiasts, sorry.

    • Paul White

      and a 10 and a 12 year old can’t distinguish it?
      I sure as hell did at that age. Toy guns were for playing, grandpa’s guns were NOT.

      EDIT: “More than 50″.
      I don’t want to sound callous, but with something like 75 MILLION minors in this country (about 25% of our 300+ million population) 50 isn’t a large number.

    • http://mother--bored.tumblr.com/ Aimee Ogden

      Did you miss the 50 gun deaths from children mishandling firearms last year? Having never had either guns or a 10-year-old, I’m not sure where I’d draw the line of an age requirement. Do you support access to firearms for toddlers? If not, then we agree that there should be limits, we just disagree on the where exactly those limits should be placed.

    • Rachel Sea

      For the sake of perspective, 450 people die from falling out of bed every year. 50 kids dead from mishandling firearms is way too many considering that they were all preventable deaths, but that doesn’t mean it’s a lot of deaths, or that those deaths were the result of the glorification of guns. Most accidents happen because people leave loaded guns out where kids can get them, because people want them handy for protection. Some of those people don’t even realize their kids know about the gun until something terrible happens. As long as there are guns on TV, kids will play at guns, it’s really all the motivation they need to pull the trigger.

      The answer to when kids are ready, is when they are ready. I was a careful, sensitive child, deemed to be no danger to myself or the local wildlife, so I was allowed a bb rifle for target practice as soon as I could consistently load and pressurize it safely without help. Different kids in the family were allowed at different times. There were other guns, both small rifles and handguns that we we’re allowed to use on the range when we were big enough to aim safely and handle the recoil solo, but they were locked up the rest of the time, and the fear of Uncle (way scarier than god) was put into us about touching them without permission. Those boundaries worked for us. If we had been different kids, in a different family, we might have needed different safety precautions.

    • jane

      The “falling out of bed” is a misleading statistic. In 2006, there were 862 undetermined/unintentional firearm deaths, although I don’t know how many of them were children. Yes, more people died falling out of bed, but they were largely elderly people who then suffered major health complications. It’s not like a toddler crashes out of bed and dies on the regular.

      The comparisons also aren’t helpful when thinking realistically about _preventable_ deaths.

    • http://mother--bored.tumblr.com/ Aimee Ogden

      Wow. Okay, sorry, you do sound callous. If 50 dead kids isn’t enough for you to think maybe something’s a bit off, then I guess I don’t know what else to say to you, except to ask how many kids need to die to make you think, you know, maybe enough is enough? Is the magic number cumulative or does it roll to zero every Jan. 1?

    • Paul White

      There’s no activity of any sort with a truly 0 death rate. I let my son play on playground equipment but every year a few kids die from that too.

    • http://mother--bored.tumblr.com/ Aimee Ogden

      So, unless we can make an activity perfectly safe, we shouldn’t try to make things better? Stellar.

    • Iwill Findu

      More kids die from asthma in a year then guns. Lets get on parents about that first, before we start freaking about the 50 deaths from guns. Since most of those deaths also could have been prevented.

    • http://mother--bored.tumblr.com/ Aimee Ogden

      Yup, it is only possible to be concerned about one thing at a time ever! Good thinking!

  • mariaisdumb

    Is anyone else NOT shocked that Maria (I HATE GUNS) Guido??? SHOCKER!!!

    • Kay_Sue

      I don’t know what makes me want to downvote this more.

      The virile hate towards someone you don’t know.
      The silly screenname to hide behind
      The sentence fragment that makes no sense….

      I think all of the above, actually.

    • Megan Zander

      I don’t know either but I wish I could up vote this times a billion

    • Kay_Sue

      ;)

    • Megan Zander

      Actually I lied,I think it’s the sentence fragment. Maybe.

    • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

      I’M IN TEARS IT IS SO BIZARRE BUT SO AMUSING

    • Bethany Ramos

      #concernedparent

    • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

      #ihatemaria

    • Crusty Socks

      ^^ Bethany (I LOVE TODDLER FAIL) Ramos

    • Kay_Sue

      It really, really is.

    • Maria Guido

      I love you Kay!

    • Kay_Sue

      I <3 you too, Maria (I HATE GUNS) Guido! ;)

    • SA

      The sentence fragment definitely. I want to know why we should NOT be shocked!!!

    • Justme

      I really feel like the lack of downvote ability is adding to the wussification of America. People need to understand that sometimes people don’t agree with what you say. Someone get Bill O’Reilly on this!!

    • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

      HAHAHAH I AM SO STEALING THIS USERNAME

    • Maria Guido

      This is my screensaver.

    • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

      I FEATURED THE COMMENT

    • Crusty Socks

      Puahahaha NICE!!!!

    • Crusty Socks

      Maria should change to “Maria (I HATE GUNS) Guido”

    • CMJ

      Like it’s THE WORST INSULT EVER.

    • Maria Guido

      Done and done.

    • brebay

      From the brain trust that brought you Obummer…

    • http://mother--bored.tumblr.com/ Aimee Ogden

      I for one am confused that commenter!

    • brebay

      Hilarious that this got featured…Is anyone else surprised that someone’s surprised that people generally write from their own point of view on a BLOG???

  • Megan Zander

    I’m not down with a gun cake for kids, nerf cake I suppose I could be ok with, but I think we are ignoring a key issues here folks. And that is, fondant is gross. All this cake, and none of it yummy. So sad.

    • Elisa Probert

      So true…fondant is nastay! Buttercream is so much better but you need a skilled decorator to make it look amazing.

    • Iwill Findu

      #1 and 8 are paintball cakes, lots of guys enjoy paintball. I personally don’t see the pleasure of shooting your friends/being shot with balls of paint powered by air, but I don’t see how they’re any worse then the nerf cake.

  • Rachel Sea

    The first one is paintball gun, which is awesome for both kids, and parents. It’s the only time when hitting your kid is actually good parenting.

    • Kay_Sue

      I can’t wait until our boys are old enough. We used to spend hours and hours and hours at it when I was a tween/young teen. A friend’s family had several acres of land, so it would make for an entire day of us having fun (and also being out of our parents’ hair).

      We took our 7 year old to do laser tag recently…and it was so awesome…

    • Natasha B

      Yes! Paintball/laser tag is also good for maintaining a healthy relationship with your SO.

    • Kay_Sue

      You can definitely work out a lot of repressed emotions, lol. When we did laser tag, my husband went running into the fog filled room, and wound up tripping and rolling up a ramp. Although he turned it into a pretty awesome combat roll about halfway through, it inspired quite a bit of pity from me, which he naturally used to his advantage. I’d like to go again when I don’t wind up feeling sorry for him and trying to see if he’s okay, resulting in being shot at pointblank range. #REVENGE

    • Natasha B

      That’s kinda awesome.. It takes skill to roll up a ramp!
      We haven’t been for awhile (winter/baby bump) but I did get him good with my lil six shooter Nerf the other day when he came in from the garage. Ambush is the best tactic.

    • Williwaw

      When I was a young adult, our whole family went paintballing for the first time, against my dad’s misgivings (because he felt paintball promoted gun violence). Then, my dad turned out to be the most psycho paintballer ever: he’d run up to me and unload three or four paintballs into my head from a foot away.

    • Kay_Sue

      OUCH! *cringes visibly*

    • Rachel Sea

      DAMN, sounds like he either had some stuff to work out, or he was trying to teach you all to hate paintball.

    • Williwaw

      Probably both.

    • Natasha B

      The mister has stalked eBay for the past year, and there is now a boxed Angel waiting patiently for each of the kids when they are ready :)
      We also own a Nerf arsenal….that ammo is as bad as Legos….all over my damn house.

  • Elisa Probert

    Are those blue marshmallows on the beer cake? Totally looks like blue marshmallows…and now I want to set fire to a marshmallow. (only way to eat them, set them on fire, blow them out, peel off and eat the charred layers, and then eat the gooey blob that remains)

    My brother had a Transformers cake when he turned seven…Optimus Prime was shooting fire at us on it! (and it was deeeeelicious!)

    • Kay_Sue

      Oh my god, my dad got my mom a fire pit for her birthday, and we have been enjoying semi-charred marshmallows almost every weekend since (they are around the corner from us and usually do a family dinner on Fridays). It’s as close to heaven as I may ever get.

    • Rachel Sea

      Have you ever tried toasting Peeps? It is messed up how delicious they are.

    • Kay_Sue

      I have not toasted Peeps. Confession: I hate the way they taste, so the only thing I have ever used Peeps for is Peeps jousting, where you put a toothpick in two Peeps, stick them together like jousters, put them in the microwave on high and whoever has the most mush left is declared the winner.

    • brebay

      Kay (I HATE PEEPS) Sue – I…I… just feel like I don’t know you at all anymore. I’m just going to close my eyes, and when I open them, you will never have written this blasphemy.

    • Kay_Sue

      I know. It changes everything. I hope we can overcome this together somehow.

    • Alanna Jorgensen

      I always poke the bunny peeps in the belly at the grocery store while chanting, “Squiiiish the peep!” when I happen to go there with my mom. Been doing it for years and now she just quietly shakes her head and walks away to leave me to my work. That’s pretty much my only use for them.

    • Rachel Sea

      I hated Peeps, until I bruleed one. If you caramelize all the sugar on the outside, they are a completely different sweet.

    • Kay_Sue

      I may take your word for that and try it…you make it sound yummy. Pretty sure it’s the use of the word “caramelize” but I’m not going to overthink it.

  • CMP414

    I think 4 and 5 freak me out the most. Don’t kids want Batman or Spiderman cakes these days?

    • Kay_Sue

      5 is a Nerf blaster, if that helps. Probably a Nerf themed party.

      And 4…well, there’s no age. Maybe it was made for an adult? #TryingToEaseYourMind

  • Sara

    My brother had an army man cake that depicted a full on battle and I had a horse track cake. My brother joined the Marines, but I’m not a degenerate gambler or anything. So the cake only predicted 1/2!!

  • Jamie-tang

    One thing I can say about all this…MURICA.

  • brebay

    I Don’t like having to peel through a layer of fondant, which pulls off all the frosting, bite into a toothpick or a pretzel support stick just to eat an oddly shaped piece of cake that was baked a week ago so there was time to turn it into a damned sculpture. What was so wrong with frosting roses and maybe a few plastic figurines on top? These art piece cakes just plain don’t taste good and take too much work. Just give me a corner piece with buttercream frosting.

  • Natasha B

    I would prob get the Nerf gun cake for the kiddos bday if they wanted it….we have a mini arsenal and have a lot of fun shooting the crap out of each other.

  • Kat

    Am I supposed to be offended or appalled or something? One looks like a paintball gun (maybe a birthday party activity), two of them don’t even look like kids cakes — one of which might be for a cop and one for military or whatever, and another is a nerf gun.

    Ooooooh!

  • http://www.paintballgames.co.uk/ alisa jacqueline

    The paintball gun cakes featured here are great…as for the others (excluding Nerf), no comment! It is all a bit of fun, maybe the context should be explained to the kids at the time. Great idea for a kids paintball party!