I really don’t know how anyone does any family planning at all. How do you figure out how many kids you should have? Anyone? Anyone? I know most logical responsible people would say look at how much money you make, the area where you live, how responsible and patient you are – blah, blah, blah. I’m sort of a pretend adult so I can’t give you any of that advice. I can just pass on some things that showed me I was ready. Who am I kidding – my second child wasn’t planned!

Here are a few signs that you may be ready to have another child…

1. You’ve decided that sex really isn’t your thing.

Finding alone time with one child is one thing, but two? Ha. You’re constantly weighing what is more important, sex or sleep?

2. You think free time is totally overrated.

I decided to put myself on a strict writing schedule after my infant goes down at night. Ask me how many pages of my book I have done.

3. You are a ninja-like multi-tasker and think your talents are underutilized.

You have no idea what all this nonsense about not having time after kids is all about. Go ahead – tempt fate.

4. You’ve realized disposable income is for suckers.

Who needs it?

5. You love worrying.

You’ve managed to come through your first child’s infancy without giving yourself an ulcer – so, why not try again?

6. You really need more clutter in your house.

I thought I was clean before I had kids. I was actually pretty braggy about it. Thanks, karma.

7. You totally screwed up the first one and need a do-over.

You didn’t take any of the advice and now your kid doesn’t sleep, eat or show-off enough. Round two!

8. You missed the boat with “elimination communication” and want to see if an infant will really use the toilet.

Why not?

9. You’ve spoiled the heck out of the first one and need to make another minion to steal her toys.

10. You’re in labor.

Now you’re definitely ready.

(photo: Blaj Gabriel/ Shutterstock)