Your MIL Is Way Better Than These Monster-In-Laws

shutterstock_8661490If you have a great mother-in-law that can double as your BFF, consider yourself lucky. You can also consider yourself in the minority. It seems that mother-in-laws are the fabled ball and chain—jokes have been made about terrible mother-in-laws for decades.

I personally was fortunate enough to marry into a family without an overbearing or insane mother-in-law. I’m not very close to my MIL because she’s a reserved person. Though my in-laws live only 45 minutes away, we don’t see them as often as we would like because they stay very busy.

But that is just a minor complaint since there are far worse things in the world. You may have a terrible in-law story of your own (that I’m dying to hear). You can also comfort yourself that you don’t have one of these awful real-life mother-in-laws that must be avoided at all costs:

1.    The Devil Herself

mil1

This forum post was titled “The Devil Herself.” I bet you didn’t know you were marrying into Satan’s family, did you? In all seriousness, I really hope I never have to call the cops on a family member.

2.    A Controlling, Jealous Witch

mil2

A controlling mother-in-law may be the worst of all—it’s nearly impossible to call her out on her manipulative ways.

3.    High School Mean Girl

mil6

My mother-in-law is definitely not a mean girl, but I’m also grateful that my husband doesn’t have any sisters. I never have to think about women in his family ganging up on me or being catty. It’s just not going to happen.

4.    Meanest Person On The Earth

mil4

The “Meanest Person On The Earth” is a difficult title to achieve, so this mother-in-law must be a real treat. I’d say that calling a daughter-in-law a terrible mother day after day earns her that crown.

5.    Crazy MIL From Hell

mil5

I fully understand that “crazy” is not a term to be thrown around lightly, especially when it comes to mental illness and suicide. However, this post was titled “I Have a Crazy Mother In Law.” I can’t even imagine a MIL threatening suicide out of jealousy. I seriously hope this woman gets some help.

(Image: CREATISTA/Shutterstock)

You can reach this post's author, Bethany Ramos, on twitter.
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    • LiteBrite

      I always say that my MIL is not from hell, but she can be annoying as such. She is expert on EVERYTHING and isn’t too shy about sharing her opinions, whether you asked for them or not. She is also nosy as all get out.

      But even at her most annoying, she has never, ever, reached the heights of insanity as these posts and more that I’ve read on the web. For that, I am profoundly grateful.

      • Timba

        Oh, jeez, mine, too! Hard to discuss things to the woman who knows everything…

    • Lee

      My MIL suffers from a range of mental illnesses, so that definitely keeps things “interesting” but that is certainly no fault of her own. It’s my FIL that I’m not crazy about. He completely disregards my existence and won’t pay attention to a word I say. He will ask a question that my husband does not know a thing about, so I will answer, and FIL will literally not even look at me when I respond, and continue the conversation with my husband like I am not even there. I think he hates women actually. We rarely see them, but when we do I have started barely talking and making excuses to not even be in the room. I have two daughters so this behavior definitely worries me, and if he keeps this crap up he definitely won’t be seeing any of us EVER.

      • Jules

        I just posted before you but my MIL would do the same thing with me. She would ask my fiancé questions about me or what we’ve been doing as if I wasn’t there, and would begrudgingly answer me if I chimed in. A while ago we just decided it would be better off if he visited them on his own. We have no kids and there’s other things I’d rather do than have lunch with people who don’t particularly like me.

      • Lee

        What is wrong with these people? I just do not get it. I would be flattered if someone wanted to marry my child and would never dream of treating him or her like this. The only reason I still even see them is because (this is horrible) they have money and I’m so paranoid my husband is going to die and I’m going to be broke (bc I’m a SAHM and haven’t worked in a couple years) and they will hopefully help me out. Who knows if they even would help me out, and we do have life insurance anyway, but I feel like I need to be decent to them to keep my options open. Stupid I know!

      • Jules

        I don’t think that’s stupid. You’re just looking out for your family. I would hope that if you had any problems, they would overlook their issues with you and help you for the sake of their grandchildren.

      • Alanna Jorgensen

        Yea, my fiance’s mom is great, but his dad leaves a lot to be desired. Thanksgiving and Christmas he acted like his son and I didn’t exist. My fiance thinks it’s because we don’t make it down to see him as much as he’d like, which knowing his dad is probably the case. Because acting like I’m invisible is totally going to make me want to visit more!

    • Jules

      Are having horrible grammar and spelling some unwritten requirement for posting on mesage boards? Jeez.

      As for MILs… Mine pretty much ignores me and I’m cool with that. I wouldn’t feel one ounce of regret cutting out of my life the types of people in those posts though.

      • Bethany Ramos

        Agree – not sure how the husbands are handling this…

      • Jules

        I would hope that in those particular situations they are siding with their wives because their mothers are obviously unreasonable!

      • Crusty Socks
      • Crusty Socks

        IKR? Whose the editor to fix this things with the wrong grammars and all?

        Thanks Evebama!

    • Lucy

      Mine doesn’t fit neatly into one of these categories, but she should be in a category of her own. Think histrionic personality disorder mixed with a little bit of borderline on the side. Attention-seeking, dramatic, manipulative, contrary, two-faced, undermining, and sometimes downright mean. Good times! Thank goodness she lives a flight away!

    • tk88

      Where are these little blips of stories from?

      • Bethany Ramos

        Random forums, as well as a few entries on Experience Project.

    • Abbe

      I also live very close to my in-laws (I could walk there) and they only see my kids maybe once a month, and only if I bring them over there. I don’t know what gives, but I feel bad for my kids. But, reading the stories above and in comments, I probably shouldn’t complain!

      • Bethany Ramos

        I don’t understand this, mine are the same! Why?? It really bugs me.

      • Andrea

        Is it possible that maybe they don’t want to feel like they are intruding? I think my parents walk that tight rope for some reason. They don’t want to intrude or meddle. But are always happy to see us.

      • Bethany Ramos

        Maybe…. And I swear I tried to give the benefit of the doubt, but they declined monthly babysitting last month because of being tired from work but didn’t want to see us otherwise. We can afford a separate babysitter, but when I put myself in their shoes, I really don’t understand.

      • Abbe

        This sounds like my in laws and I don’t get it either. I get along with them, my kids are great and past the baby stage. I just see how involved everyone else’s parents are involved with their kids and it hurts, and my kids are starting to figure out which sucks.

      • Katherine Handcock

        My parents have been very upfront about the fact that they love their grandkids, but that they find little kids very hard to be around – actually, my mom has even commented that she found it hard to parent her own kids at this age! It can be so many things – everything from “I did my time with diapers/potty accidents and I don’t want to do that any more” to “the pitch of their voices makes my hearing aid squeal” to “I have no idea to relate to someone whose principal interest is Sesame Street” – but the end result is that there are lots of grandparents out there who don’t enjoy little kids. I think many people who feel that way don’t have any idea how to say that to their child/child’s partner, so they just try to avoid the issue altogether.

      • Bethany Ramos

        I get it, but I don’t. I would never feel that way, so it hurts me. I am coming from a place where I felt unwanted as a kid, so now I bend over backward to make my kids feel wanted and their future grandkids too. IMO, when you have kids, you are also signing up for GRANDKIDS.

      • JustAGuest

        Uh, no. When you have kids, you are signing up to have kids. If they choose to have kids and choose to ask you to be a part of it, then you may have grandkids. But you don’t get those automatically.

        Similarly, you may not know until you have kids that you don’t really like little kids. Or your health may get worse as you age. Or you might in fact like little kids but be very busy. Or sick. Or abducted by aliens Or…really, many things.

        But, bottom line, it almost certainly really isn’t about you. If you have a good relationship with them, why not try to talk to them directly about it? Say that you would love for them to be more involved, but you aren’t sure if that’s something they’re comfortable with, and is there anything you can do or is it the kids’ ages or whatever. Just talking about it might make it easier to find out the real issue and avoid hurt feelings in all directions.

      • Bethany Ramos

        Talking is a great suggestion that we will try, but I still disagree. It’s not about me, but I am describing how I would treat my own kids.

        I believe kids = grandkids as well, or at least the possibility. Health is not an issue in this situation either. Personally, I think parenting for kids and then grandkids is lifelong and does not end at 18.

      • Guest

        I think what you’re saying is accurate and this is coming from someone who will love my kids/grandkids/granddogs or whoever for all of my life: not everyone is as awesome as us. Some parents find out they suck at parenting and just stumble through it until the kids are adults. Some get sick of their kids or as soon as they’re out of the house they’re over it. I wish that wasn’t the case but being an involved parent/grandparent is a choice and one that some people just aren’t interested in making. I’m glad you are though :)

      • Bethany Ramos

        Thank you!! You too, for your future grandkids. :)

      • Rachel Sea

        When I got my hearing aids children’s voices did take some getting used to. I had been under the misapprehension that my friend’s daughter was soft-spoken. HAHA. NOPE.

      • Guest

        I don’t have kids but I honestly think some parents are just like this. I realized that some people are just raised differently and feel differently about seeing others (family included). My in laws would have us over constantly for dinners and going out etc. My parents I’d never hear from unless I called them for something or went over there. I just finally realized I have to be the one to stop by or ask them if they want to do something- and if they turn me down it is just timing or they’re tired etc. because they are really, really not super social and creatures of routine. I also find that the more I make time to check in with them the easier it is to get together etc. You just have to keep in mind it usually has nothing to do with you and they’re just in their comfort bubble.

      • Bethany Ramos

        That is a great explanation, thank you. It helps to think it make be about their insecurities or comfort zone or what have you so I feel less frustrated. I’m sorry to hear about your parents too.

      • Crusty Socks

        BTW, there’s no such thing as a grandparent’s legal right to visitation.

        NONE. If some whacko judge tries that shit on anyone, get a lawyer.

      • Megan Zander

        that’s true almost of the time! there is a teeny tiny window where the grandparents can get visitation over a parents objection, but they have to prove that their own relationship with the child is like that of a parent and that to remove them from the child’s life would be so damaging that it’s akin to abuse of the same level that would allow the state to step in and take the kid. So that judge who granted visits for an unborn kid, i really hope they fought that.

      • MellyG

        Yep, that one made no sense to me! (and that was the same one with the judge saying something “off the record”?) something is not right at all with that one. We’re missing a LOT or the mom is full of complete BS

      • Jem

        There is though. It’s new and ever changing and it varies from state to state but some states DO have Grandparental rights. I studied it while I was in school getting my Social Work License and I also facilitated supervised visitation between grand parents and their grandchildren from time to time when I did supervised visitation. (I am in MN for what it is worth)

      • Crusty Socks

        Are you sure it’s not due to accusations of abuse on the parents and the courts use the grandparents as monitors?

      • Jem

        while re-reading the statute here in MN, it looks like it is more geared towards kids who lived with their grandparents for a period of time or for kids whose parents are not together/ divorcing. That was always the case when I did supervised visitation. Either that the kid’s parents were never married and weren’t together now or were divorcing so the mom would have to bring the child to a neutral location to have supervised visitation with their grandparents from their dad’s side.

      • Crusty Socks

        Yea, those might be the only circumstances in which grandparents might get visitation.

        But I know of no statutes in any of the 50 states that give grandparents any rights over the children. And there’s nothing in Common Law that would support it either.

        Interesting (and kinda obvious) though, most Asian countries do have grandparental visitation rights.

      • MellyG

        It’s called defacto parenting. Which is essentially what you stated above. Or if one parent is dead, and they can try to visit. But Brebay above is right.

      • brebay

        Crusty’s right. Troxel v Granville is the case that pretty well ruled it unconstitutional to ENFORCE grandparent visitation. The holding is that custody includes a parent’s basic right to decide wih whom their child spends time. Some states will still order it, but if you appeal, you’ll win on the precedent of Troxel.

      • MellyG

        I was going to say that – thank you fellow legal guru <3

      • Timba

        Ack, see, I have NIGHTMARES about living this close to my MiL. She’d over DAILY! Now she’s nowhere near the level of crazy described above, but she’s one of those people who is never wrong (and she’s a lawyer, so…) and the way she did it is the only way it can be done. Just slightly above the ‘normal’ MiL issues, I suppose. Still, I’d go nuts if she visited monthy. The quarterly visits stress me and the hubs enough as is!

        Thank goodness the Navy keeps us a coupla states away.

      • http://www.twitter.com/ohladyjayne allisonjayne

        I see my mom maybe every 2 or 3 months…she lives the next city over, about a 30-45 minute drive depending on traffic, she is retired and has no hobbies or anything taking up her time…but she refuses to come visit us in the city, because she “hates driving in the city” and also because we don’t let her smoke in our apartment. So if I want my kid to spend any time with her, I have to rent a car and drive out to see her. I wish it didn’t bother me but it does.

      • CMP414

        I only see my mom every 2-3 months as well. She lives in the next neighborhood over so at traffic’s worst it’s 10-15 minutes. She still works but has no interests and is a true loner. She saw my daughter on Christmas and will see her tomorrow but that is only because it is my girl’s birthday party. It’s really sad. None of my friends can relate they have such wonderfully involved moms. I may be in my 30′s but it bothers me

      • http://www.twitter.com/ohladyjayne allisonjayne

        :( Uff. What is up with that? I am worried my mom is actually depressed or something.
        Aside from the whole wanting it for my kid, I am also rather jealous of my parent-friends who get to go on WEEKLY dates because of free grandparent babysitting. :(

      • CMP414

        I know my mom is depressed. she takes meds for it and sees a therapist weekly but it changes nothing. she has a very “woe is me attitude” i get kinda jealous of my friends’ moms too because they also babysit and help which is so different from my life. today is my daughter’s birthday party. my mom will come and be nice but hang back. meanwhile my husband’s 78 yr old gram is at the hall kicking ass and decorating to help me out all while her husband is in ICU. My mom should be there too participating.

    • jsterling93

      Mine isn’t mean but she is a sympathy hog. Everything in the world that goes wrong happens to her and her life is so terrible. She calls twice a week to complain about all the things that are wrong in her world. Luckily she loves so far away I never have to see her and my husband talks to her on the phone. I never do. We visited once this year and after 3 days I was so depressed I wanted to smother myself with one of her couch cushions.

    • Lauren_Alli

      My MIL is not my best friend, but I definitely enjoy spending time with her and having her around. She’s funny and she doesn’t judge me when my house is messy or in any of the ways I have chosen to parent my daughter. She always brings food when she visits. I consider her as another mother. But, my husband and I have been dating since I was 15, and my parents moved to another state when I was 16, so as you can imagine, I spent a LOT of time at her house in my last couple of years of high school. My SIL and I have an okay relationship I guess. It’s really a lack-thereof any relationship. I’m pretty sure I am a better daughter to her mom than she is though.

    • JLH1986

      I am very lucky, my MIL is amazing. She and I talk independently of my husband, we go out without him and her husband. I have always known I was lucky, but these remind me I should be praying to everyone I got her as a MIL. What is going on with these husbands? My husbands Stepmom is less cuckoo but she’s also more like a typical MIL, she’s nosy and always has advice, his dad is like this. And he has zero problem telling his dad, “STFU and you need to tell your wife STFU or I will”. Maybe it’s a dad/son thing v. mom/son thing?

    • Crusty Socks

      I’m sorry, but I’m so distracted by the horrendous grammar in each of those stories…

      But they are funny as hell

      • Bethany Ramos

        “Aloud” makes me sad. :(

      • Jules

        The first time I thought it was a typo or whatever. But then she wrote it a second time…
        It makes me cringe as much as “would of”. Ughhh

      • Bethany Ramos

        I also saw an amazing one on BabyCenter. “once so ever” = “whatsoever.” NOOOOO.

      • Jules

        WOW.
        Let’s hope these children have great teachers and/or tutors and won’t ever have to rely on their parents for grammar lessons.

      • MellyG

        unfortunately, i fear it’s just going to be another generation of really stupid people

      • Rachel Sea

        My office receptionist asks for signatures by saying, “I need your John Henry.” It’s HANCOCK woman. Jeebus.

      • AP

        I’ve heard John Henry used as a slang term for “penis” so perhaps, someday, someone will take her at her word and whip it out.

        Then she’ll learn.

      • Bethany Ramos

        HAHAHA makes me think of Herbie Hancock on Tommy Boy.

      • Ennis Demeter

        I knew an older attorney who did that every day.

      • Lindsay

        My personal favorite is the Pinterest perennial “Wah-Lah” in place of voila. And they all. Fucking. Do it.

      • Holly

        That is one that bothers me a lot. My son’s teacher used “wah-lah” in a newsletter once. It took a lot of restraint to keep my comments to myself!

      • Jessica

        One of my friends will post about all of the “aarons” she has to run. It makes me laugh every time.

      • AnastasiaMcNally

        Eek! I have a girl on Facebook who writes “mose well” instead of “may as well” and every time it makes me cringe!

      • MellyG

        Ugh- you have to be kidding.

        in my family we often type, to each other only, “probably’ as “pry or prolly” – it’s an inside joke that has to do with our accent and the way we say it, but FFS, we KNOW the right way to spell it! I read a list of “commonly” misstated words, and i was baffled (chester drawers? really? i know it might KIND of sounds like that sometimes, but do people really think it’s called chester drawers? and it’s common enough to make a list?) Don’t people learn things in school? or by reading?

      • ElleJai

        That reminds me. My psychologist wrote a book filled with little mistakes, but the one that most surprised me was “roll-a-coaster”…. And this guy has a degree?!

        (He’s genuinely a brilliant therapist, but his spelling blows).

      • Rana

        A girl on my fb always announces things like
        “Today Emma is two in a half!”
        “Three in a half weeks til we can see Daddy!”
        At first I was so confused, like I didn’t even know what she was trying to say!

      • Lindsay

        I know a man who genuinely thinks until is spelled “in till.”

        Blows my mind every time he posts it.

      • FormerlyKnownAsWendy

        Dear God. Would of makes me angry.

      • MellyG

        That made me want to cry a little inside

    • Shoshone

      My MIL has three kids, and I’d say there are probably only three people in the world that she likes (well, and the grandkids.) She HATES everyone else, and that includes me. However! She (and I) avoid confrontation at all costs so when we visit (which is not often, even though she lives 15 min away,) it’s all pleasant, even if it’s fake. I can live with that.

    • Kay_Sue

      And now I’m going to go and send my MIL a nice Facebook message to thank her for not being awful, and being generally awesome.

      • Crusty Socks

        I bet you’ll be a great MIL to your sons’ wives (um… 1 per son only)

      • Kay_Sue

        If they have wives. I’d be totally cool with son-in-laws also, although I’d be disappointed if they weren’t flamboyant clowns like Cam on Modern Family.

        I plan on plying their future mates with alcohol and blowing as smoke up their asses as possible…whatever it takes to get them to take these…blessings…and keep them. Keep them *forever*.

      • Andrea

        Have you seen that graphic on FB about “rules for dating my son”? It always grates on my nerves. I think women that think that they will have ANY control over who their sons date/marry are seriously delusional. The GF/wife controls access to something else (if you know what I mean) and you will never win. EVER.

        My plan is same as yours. I will try so very very very hard not to have that future spouse hate me. I want them to love me like their mother and I want my sons to NEVER have to deal with the same bullshit I had to deal with regarding my asshole in-laws.

      • Kay_Sue

        That thing drives me nuts. I know it’s supposed to be funny–BUT IT ISN’T. The slut-shaming and lack of personal responsibility expected of the male in question is just…gross. I trust my kids. Hell, not even that, not yet–right now, I trust myself to raise them to select mates that are good for them and whom they are also good for. They will make mistakes and I imagine there will be quite a few awkward family dinners while they get there, but overall, I am going to rely on them to pick their own mates. They are the ones that will have to live with them, after all, not me. Hopefully. ;)

      • Andrea

        Glad I’m not the only one that doesn’t think is funny AT ALL but hugely insulting and offensive. I though it was me feeling guilty because of the sucky ass relationship I have my MIL, but I’m glad it’s not just me.

      • Kay_Sue

        Not in the slightest. I am right there with you.

      • MellyG

        I don’t either. I thought it was just me because i don’t have kids, and if i had sons i’d “Get it” – but i just find it gross. Really gross. I hope to raise my kids to be capable grown adults that can make wise decisions, because i don’t have the energy to be a controlling freak for eternity!

      • brebay

        Oh god no, I have sons and it’s still really gross.

      • Rachel Sea

        I know right? Worst thing my MIL does is chew with her mouth open. She, in turn, is grateful that both her kids married women who don’t hate her.

      • Kay_Sue

        Mine…keeps her house really cold? I have no idea what to find fault with right now. We’ve only been together eight-ish years, married two though, so she has time, I guess. ;)

      • Bethany Ramos

        #howdareshe

      • MellyG

        Better than hot! I’m living with my grandma temporarily, and she thinks it’s cold when it’s 80 degrees. she keeps the house close to 80 ,and i’m constantly sneaking to turn it down, or open windows. Other than that she’s perfect thought :)

      • Bethany Ramos

        My in-laws are classic older people that keep the house SO HOT. We beg them to lower the temp every time we come over, or I feel faint. ;)

      • MellyG

        Try LIVING in it. i don’t get faint, but my throat is constantly sore, and ugh. For Christmas we got them a little space heater (actually not little, it’s kind of awesome, looks like a fireplace) so i can turn down the heat and that can keep them warm. Then i can at least sleep!

      • Bethany Ramos

        Ha ha OMG!! We did live with my in-laws briefly for like 3 weeks when we were closing on a house, and I was breast-feeding, so it made me crazy hot at the time. I wanted to tell my husband to pay them the difference so that we could turn down the air conditioning, but luckily, they were cool with it while we were there. :-)

      • spunkysmum

        Yeah, a cold house is way better than a hot one for sure. Many’s the time I’ve sneaked a window open myself when I was in a house that was too warm. And people who jack up the heat in a vehicle are almost worse.

    • Bic

      Most of these sound awful, but I’m not so sure about number 3. If they had a reasonable separation I don’t have an issue with family members staying in contact with an ex. As long as they aren’t cocking around trying to stage a reunion, I don’t think its necessary to end a friendship just because they are no longer a couple.

      • http://www.ambiencechaser.com/ Elizabeth Licata

        Yeah. But I also wouldn’t really think it was weird for a woman to go out for drinks for her birthday with just her own daughters.

      • Bic

        Good point, I hadn’t noticed that. I can understand feeling a bit left out and a little hurt, but there’s nothing wrong with having mother and daughter(s) time.

    • Shepherd

      My MIL was abusive to my partner, and cycles between having a change of heart and trying to smother him, and being a raging bucket of cock. Her house has not been properly cleaned since he moved out. When we visited at Xmas, there were still stocking stuffers sitting where they had been opened last year, and wrapping paper under the couch. Her pantry expired eight years ago. When I met him, he didn’t know that being slapped, screamed at, locked, out, and passive-aggressively and punitively denied food were not normal family behaviors. What scares me is she’s in mother fucking Children’s Ministry! She works with kids, and she did that to her son!

      She swings between needing us in her life, turned over a new leaf, changed her ways, got back with Jesus, the list goes on. But I know it will end again, it always does. She’s as far from our lives as we can make her, and still have contact with his dying grandpa, who she is caretaker of.

      She was perfectly personable this last year, friendly and supportive, but I’m waiting for the crazy bitch shoe to drop, and for me to come home to find my partner in tears or in a flashback induced heap because of her.

      I have a MIL from hell, and there’s no fucking way she’s going to be in our kids’ lives if we have any.

      • Crusty Socks

        You should look into the Federal Witness Protection Program. I’ll send you a brochure.

      • Bethany Ramos

        Wow, wow, wow, this makes me really sad, especially the children’s ministry part.

      • Alexandra

        In better news “being a raging bucket of cock” is now my favorite expression.

      • brebay

        We’re getting a lot of awesome new friends over here lately. This site seems to have a way of self-filtering the no-funs. I’m taking “raging bucket of cock” as your hostess gift.

    • MaebykittyRN

      My MIL has improved greatly since I met her, but when my husband and I were talking about getting married, she told him that I was on a “lower intelligence level” than he was. And that she wasn’t sure she wanted her grandchildren to have my genetics. I lol’d and married him anyway.

      • spunkysmum

        LOL, the best revenge!

    • SA

      MIL is out there, but right now we are on an upswing in our relationship so I won’t hash out old details in hopes things will stay that way. FIL and “Precious” are a little out there as well. I basically keep notes on everything in case we ever have to break contact and someone tries to pull visitation on me. UGH.

      • Bethany Ramos

        Precious!!

      • SA

        I am so happy to have found a code word for her now! ;)

      • Me-Me

        Like the life sucking ring from Lord of the Rings!

    • Zettai

      God. My MIL is far from perfect (occasional bitch, hypocrite, secret racist) but at least she isn’t psycho. Gotta give thanks for the little things, I guess.

    • footnotegirl

      So glad I have my mother in law! She may frustrate the living beeezus out of me whenever the whole family tries to plan something together, BUT she is kind to a fault and not at all bossy. She also lives about 2,000 miles away, so that helps.
      It always surprises me that people keep poisonous family members like this in their lives. My mother’s mom was a piece of work and our whole family would have been better off if we’d just cut her from our lives. Trust me, your kids do not need a grandma in their lives so much that you should keep them in contact with a poisonous abusive piece of filth.

    • Kelly

      These stories make me realize just how bad my MIL really is. Mine decided she didn’t feel like having kids anymore and had her 15 year old son committed and tried to have her 13 year old son sent to juvie for no reason. We had to buy the younger one from her. Literally. She wanted a kid with no record of behavior problems locked up because she had a new boyfriend and had no time for him. She also cleaned out his room and gave all his shit to said new boyfriend.

      She’s been fake dying of cancer for over 20 years now. She even shaved her head a couple of times to “prove it.”

      Plus, she raged at me when my husband had a vasectomy because “now he can’t have children with his second wife!” You know, the one he’ll marry when he finally leaves me. Haha, yeah… so much fun.

      • jane

        Holy eff.

      • Bethany Ramos

        Omg no. :(

      • MellyG

        Ugh, that’s an awful awful woman

      • ElleJai

        Please tell me you managed to run off with the 15 year old too, preferably to a different state :/

    • Sandy

      My MIL and SIL showed up a week before the wedding begging him to “not make the biggest mistake of his life” – ie marry me.

    • Lindsay

      My grandma is that MIL, except I have her as flesh and blood.

      She periodically accuses my mom of stealing her shit, cursed out the photographers at my brother’s wedding for having the audacity to try to put her on a schedule, bad-mouths my family members to me, once bought $120 worth of shoes and $150 worth of makeup in front of me and then told me she was on a budget and couldn’t buy me a slice of pizza for dinner after I took my Saturday, picked her up, she was still in pajamas though she swore she would be ready to go, waited for her to be ready for two more hours, followed her around Macys for three hours, and then an additional two after we spent five minutes in a store I like (none of this is an exaggeration. All I wanted out of that day was a new hair clip), told me systematically what she hates about each of my friends (including, but not limited to my friend who made me laugh while my family was sitting shiva for my grandfather). I could go on.

      Tl;dr- she’s aaaaawwwfuuuuulllllll

    • Imeatinghummus

      My MIL is an angel and I frequently remind myself how lucky I am to have her! I truly feel for all these women. I was in a long term relationship with a man whose mother was not just nasty to me but an awful person. I’ll never forgot when I heard her tell a person at ATT that she was “going to f-ing kill her” because she was on hold for too long.

    • Jessifer

      My MIL lives on a different continent and I love it!

    • Bender

      My MIL lives with us, and is okay…she mostly keeps to herself, which is fine with me. I would rather live with her than my own mother, that’s for sure!

    • Emptynesterthankgod

      When my husbands parents were married his mums MIL was horrible, so much so that they moved and put an ocean between them (I guess lucky for me as I wouldn’t have met my husband otherwise). My MIL never wanted to push her children away by being that type of person and she was an amazing woman. I miss her every day and am so thankful I had her in my life, she made me a better person.

    • Natasha B

      Am thanking my lucky stars my MIL lives on the opposite coast. She is awesome and I love her, buuuuuuuttttt who knows how well we’d get along if we lived closer??? She also tells everyone I’m her fav DIL, so…she gets good Christmas presents :)
      My SIL (the one physically closest to us) is a manipulative, jealous, passive aggressive twat waffle though. We haven’t seen them for going on 2 years because neither hubs or I can stomach her anymore.

    • TheGiantPeach

      I can honestly say that my MIL was one of the good ones. I moved to a new city to be with my husband, and she took me in and treated me as one of her own. She was such a loving person, so unselfish. She loved her family fiercely. Unfortunately, she passed away 5 years ago, and I miss her every day. My son never got a chance to know her and I grieve for the relationship they would have had. I am so thankful for the time I had with her and wish I could have had more.

    • brebay

      There’s more going on in #1. No judge is going to risk his career to tell some illiterate twit anything “off the record,” which is SUPER illegal. She probably lost her kids because she did as well in parenting class as she did in English class. It takes a LOT for both bio parents to lose custody.

      • MellyG

        I was going to say, judges don’t really do that. As a lawyer i’ve had a judge tell me something “off the record” ONCE, and it dealt with me (not the client) and the other attorney was present. It was an extreme circumstance (and nothing good or bad, both the other attorney and I had recently passed the bar, and were both women. The judge merely wanted to take us out to lunch and give us tips and what we did well, and where we could improve on our courtroom appearance. It was super cool and NOT the norm. Had it been an “off the record” comment re: our client, or TO the client – the judge would have been risking their career!

    • MellyG

      My mother has been SUPER lucky – i don’t know how she does it, but my grandmother (her MIL) still calls her “daughter” even though my parents are divorced, and talks to my mother more than my father. They were super close when my parents were married, and grandma just wasn’t willing to give up her daughter!

      I don’t have a MIL, but i lived with an ex fiance for 6 years. His mother was amazing, and I miss her as my potential MIL more than i miss him as potential husband. She would take me out to lunch, and shopping, and tell me all the time how excited she was to have me in the family, and how grateful she was that her son had me. When we broke up i got a ton of texts from her begging me to take her son back (it was mutual, so i don’t think he wanted to come back!).

      I think MILs are like people – if you’re a decent sort of human, you’ll be a decent MIL. If you’re an insufferable human, you are likely that miserable to everyone, not just your DIL

    • Plonk

      There is also the poor lady who wrote to Dear Prudence because her MIL was trying to poison her. Reading awful stories like this really helps put things in perspective.
      http://www.slate.com/articles/life/dear_prudence/2012/03/poisoned_meals_my_mother_in_law_may_be_trying_to_make_me_sick_.html

    • gothicgaelicgirl

      Not married yet but my fella’s mam is always threatening to haunt him if he does anything to upset me.
      Literally word for word, every time we visit her- “You look after that young lady now, or I swear to god, I’ll f****ng haunt you.”
      Or my personal favourite, (we told her we were waiting a loooong time before thinking about a baby) and she replied “GOOD, cos if you knock her up when she’s this young, I’ll cut it off, she’s too young to have you ruin her!”

      LOL I LOVE his mother, brilliant sense of humour.
      He always jokes- My mother loves you more than she loves me.
      To which I always reply- That’s cos I didn’t roll out of her hoo-ha.

      • Guest

        I love to pull out “I’m going to f****ng haunt you” line but never thought to use it in that context…I’m going to remember that.

    • Melissa

      My mother-in-law is a sweetheart, but she also lives 1000 miles away and we only see her once a year at most. Maybe a giant buffer zone like this is the key to peace and harmony with the in-laws?

      • Bethany Ramos

        I agree!

    • Sam Inoue

      wow, my mother in law is sometimes controlling, but she means well. She worries about how young I am and just wants to help. Every time she starts driving me crazy I will think of this.
      I will think of these stories written with proper grammar though…

    • Pumplestilskin

      I now want to walk across the road, yep, across the road, and give my mother in law a huge hug. The worst thing she’s ever done is tell me that she wasn’t getting enough sex from my father in law. After momentarily seeing stars, smelling toast and going deaf I just sat there and listened. Then I went home and told my husband because if I had to know so did he.

      • Bethany Ramos

        Hahaha!

    • Guest

      My relationship with my MIL (and her whole family) was awful at the beginning. We got engaged shortly after I met them in the biggest cluster fuck of a meeting-the-boyfriend’s-family that I know of. My husband told his mom of our engagement right after making her cry when he told her we weren’t going to come to Christmas with them because they were so awful to me and neither of us would tolerate that. Luckily my psycho SIL flew back home (out of state) so we were able to have Christmas just us and FIL/MIL. Slowly we saw them for dinners and eventually were super close and I’m quite convinced they both like me more than their own children. (They still love their children, but several are crazy) It is hard now because they moved out of state so we don’t get to see them regularly and I’m not one for calling and talking for hours on end with her but they do miss us quite a bit.

    • Me-Me

      Mine hates me because she cant have my place in the bedroom.. I hate her for so many things I don’t have the time or effort to write. She is evil, manipulating, guilt tripping, backstabbing, gossip whore who has no boundries. She is bitter and has driven everyone away. Then whines about how no one has anything to do with her. I told hubs, maybe you should point out to her that how she treats people could be why no one goes near her. I would rather live in a box than stay there for 1 night. She ruined it with me right off the bat. Treated me horribly for years. Well now I don’t take it and finally my hubs is aware. He was a horrible mommas boy. Now that shes older, she has started hinting to hubs about maybe moving in with us or moving together. Absolutely NOT happening. Hubs told her that her and I don’t get along and she’d have to talk to me but it wont work, I told him for many years, you want to live with mommy? Then go ahead and move with her. Without me and our daughter. I couldn’t do it and stay sane and sober. I was in the hospital a few years back for severe head pain. Like I thought I was dying pain. 7 days in hospital, still in gut wrenching pain, had a spinal tap, blood patch, MRI..the works. Thought maybe a stroke-that bad. I come back to her house. The sun happened to be bright in her windows. We were sleeping. The bitch comes in, opens the blinds just on me (not hubs). She purposely put bright ass sunlight directly in my face! Who does that? That’s not even the worst. I should write a book damn.

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