• Fri, Feb 21 - 11:00 am ET

I Lost All The Baby Weight And Now I Just Look Like A Sad Bag Of Laundry

174082643I realize that I wasn’t deathfat when I was pregnant; I was at the high end of normal, but even so, gaining so much weight in nine months was scary. I worried about my baby being healthy, but I also thought about each pound having to come back off.

I never had weight issues as a child-quite the opposite. I was all knees and elbows,  thin as a rake, and didn’t break 100 pounds until I was in high school. But after moving out at 14,  working a few crappy full-time jobs at once, I started eating my feelings in the form of piles of fried rice and french fries. I didn’t stop until I was obese, and then worked my ass off for about two years to get to get down to a healthy weight. I changed my entire lifestyle to get fit, and being fit in turn changed my entire life: I wore what I wanted, I climbed mountains, I snowboarded, I did all this amazing shit I never thought I could when I was fat.

See? Life IS better for skinny people!

At the midwives’ clinic, every weigh-in was a triumph, as well as another pin in the ratty Voodoo doll of my confidence. At the supermarket, I can’t help but glance through all the glossies that show women who lost their baby weight in a month. A week! A few days! BEFORE THEY HAD THEIR BABY. Some women ate nothing and had no babies and they are so thin that people are losing their goddamn minds over it. All of them blurred together into one bronzed demon that clung to my back and demanded I eat less carbs.

I had my kid in the middle of the apocalyptically dark Alaskan winter. Temperatures often dip below negative 30 degrees, and the sun is above the horizon for a just a few measly hours a day. After having a hard labour and the lingering medical fuckery of septicemia, I didn’t go skiing. I didn’t lift weights. I didn’t go out much at all. I tried to take care of myself, and part of that was eating really well. Slowly, steadily, the pounds started peeling off, and I was totally ecstatic to lose the  weight.

 

Me. I’m going to be ME again.

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  • Maria Guido

    OH my god. I don’t know how I would have handled hearing that from a stranger. Good for you for not freaking out. I have a “gross waddle of skin on my abdomen” too. These damn kids!

  • Joy

    It would have been exceedingly difficult not to punch that woman right in the baby maker, I think. Can’t we all agree that it’s a good rule of thumb not to comment on a stranger’s body, regardless of whether or not they are pregnant/post partum/growing extra limbs out of their forehead/a goddamn purple sparkle unicorn? Just don’t do it, ever, please and thank you.

    • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

      amen

    • Joy

      Eve, this whole discussion reminds me- I am throwing a baby shower in two weeks and one of the games I wanted to play was to list a bunch of rude/inappropriate things that people frequently say to pregnant women and have the guests come up with sassy replies for the guest of honor to give. I have a few in mind already (“Are you sure you’re not having twins?” or “I hope that’s decaf!”) but I’d love to have more insight from those who already have babies. Is there any way we could do one of those open threads about the most outrageous things strangers said to readers when they were pregnant? Pleeeeease?

    • Emil

      I was told that my caffeinated coffee was going to result in my daughter having ADHD. My response: meh..she would have got that from me anyway.

    • http://www.gypsyforlife.blogspot.com/ Trista Crass

      Preach. No random comment about someone’s body is good! They are either creepy, awkward or gross~!

    • Alexandra

      I’ve just never even been approached like that I can’t fathom what I’d say, how fucking awkward!

  • Katherine Handcock

    I wish more people would talk about the fact that, whether you lose every last ounce of weight or not, your body just plain will be different! It may not be BAD different, but it’s going to be disconcerting, because you picture yourself one way and that’s not what you are any more. I went in for a proper bra sizing 2 1/2 years after having my second, and I’m apparently an F cup now. I believe WTAF is the only way to describe how I felt when I heard that!

    • http://www.gypsyforlife.blogspot.com/ Trista Crass

      Dude, I’m still a DDD cup. Someone kill me, if my back doesn’t first…

  • Crusty Socks

    I wouldn’t worry too much. I know that the pregnancy really wrecked havoc on your body, but you’re also getting older, which also causes your body to change in ways you didn’t anticipate.

    (EDIT: I meant this comment to cheer you on…)

  • Lauren_Alli

    I’m sure she meant that as an uplifting message, but I agree that it’s not a good idea to comment on anyone’s weight or body. Basically ever. And I also think that there should be more normal body images broadcasted so that women understand that lose baby weight is not equal to look the same as before. Celebrities running around in their bikinis a month after birth are doing nothing for helping women see what is normal. Half the people I have encountered expect you to come out of the hospital the same size as before. Here’s a fun story from my hospital stay. After my c-section, I looked down at my stomach and said “Oh wow” (which, btw, meant, LOOK HOW THIN I AM!!!!!) and the nurse said “Oh don’t worry sweetie, it will go away in time”. -.-

    • meah

      Good one! I answered the door after being home from the hospital for less than a week, and the nice woman trying to sell me on being a Jehova’s Witness asked me when I was due. I was holding my damn baby!

    • kris

      I had a Jehova’s Witness do that to me too. My son was 18 months old, I had lost the baby weight already, I just still had the strange floppy belly, and when I said I wasn’t pregnant, she looked at me and said, “it sure looks like you are.” I slammed the door in her face and never opened it for them again.

    • SmrtGrl86

      If one of those fuckwads said that shit to me when I was a few weeks postpartum, they’re next mission would include being in several pieces in several garage cans around the nearest city. I was very ragey postpartum, if you didn’t show up with food and the intention of letting me take a nap GTFO.

    • http://www.gypsyforlife.blogspot.com/ Trista Crass

      WTF.

      “I’m gonna go ahead and argue with you about whether or not you’re pregnant….”

    • SDM14

      When I was visiting my baby in the NICU a few days after she was born, a hospital staff member indicated that she thought I was pregnant. Really? I’m shuffling slowly, clearly still in pain from childbirth, look sleep-deprived, have a hospital wristband on, visiting a NICU…gaaah

    • Jessica

      We stopped at the pharmacy on the way home from the hospital, with the baby & everything, & the pharmacist looked me up & down & said, “You know you can’t take ibuprofen when you’re pregnant right?” The ibuprofen was with stool softeners & something newborn vitamins. I looked at her & mumbled something about just having had a baby while pointing at said baby. But it really bummed me out for a minute.

    • SDM14

      So bizarre! Did the pharmacist think you were magic-pregnant with another baby? Or that you borrowed that newborn you were toting around? The stool softeners should have been the dead-giveaway. People.

    • lea

      Right? I went to the GP for suspected mastitis. I had my then 10 day old baby with me in the pram. Drs first question:

      Are you pregnant?

      I just stood there, a bit shocked. Before managed to say “uh, no, I just had this baby here about 10 days ago…”

      Then she tried to prescribe me some antibiotics that are not safe for BF-ing. “Oh sorry I didn’t realise you were breastfeeding”.

      Really? The mastitis, and the cracked bleeding nipple you just looked at didn’t give that away.

      So on to the next antibiotic. Penicillin. To which I am allergic. Its on my file. And I had JUST told her.

      I put it down to her having a really bad day. And asked for a different Dr next time!

    • SDM14

      I think sometimes health-care professionals are so used to asking childbearing-age women if they’re pregnant that they just go into autopilot and ask, without thinking. I’ve been to prenatal-related appointments (e.g. chiropractic to get my breech baby to turn) and been asked if I’m pregnant…ummm, yes?

    • http://www.gypsyforlife.blogspot.com/ Trista Crass

      SAME THING when I had mine! I was like “WHOA! MY stomach deflated! COOL!” and she midwife was like, “Oh it’s got a WAYS TO GO.”

      I know she didn’t mean anything by it, so I just laughed.

    • Momma425

      Omg, I was shocked after my c-section- I still looked pregnant and I was pissed. The doctor kept telling me it was normal and I was like, “Okay…but there is no baby or amniotic fluid in there anymore. WTF is in there???”

    • http://www.cupcakesandnerds.com/ Nerdy Cupcake

      I have to admit, I was shocked how insensitive people were in those weeks post-partum when you still look and stand like you are fairly pregnant. I had my MIL pat my belly and say ‘It’s OK, you won’t look pregnant forever’ (completely out of the blue, our conversation was not even about post-baby weight).
      Also about 2 weeks after having mine, I had a friend over who hadn’t had kids and had no other friends with kids. I remember I was feeling like I looked really good, and was wearing an (albeit extremely forgiving) dress from before I was pregnant. I was making her a cup of coffee and she was just staring at me and then said, unprompted “So when do you stop looking pregnant?” After she left I cried and cried. I don’t know what goes through peoples heads some times.

  • Kay_Sue

    “But maybe instead, I’ll be That Girl that Wears a Bikini at Inappropriate Times (Nana’s wake-whatever, it was summer!). I’ll be Magda-tan, and when people ask WTF that gross waddle of skin on my abdomen is, I’ll just shake it at them, while giving them the sign of the beast and screech “I CARRIED A CHILD IN THIS BODY AND HE IS GOING TO BE PRESIDEEEEENNNTT!” in the voice of the lead singer of Ensiferum, and then howl like a wolf, so they know I’m serious.”

    The imagery in this paragraph, man…it is…stunning. And hilarious. I am sorry you were accosted with someone else’s perception of how you should appreciate your body.

    • http://ichasekids.com/ Litterboxjen

      A +1 isn’t enough for you, I just want to highlight how much I love your phrasing on this: I am sorry you were accosted with someone else’s perception of how you should appreciate your body.

    • FormerlyKnownAsWendy

      Something about the “imagery” in this just sucked, to me. And I usually always agree with you :)

    • Kay_Sue

      Weird things stroke my funny bone. This was one of them. ;)

  • G.E. Phillips

    My whole life, I was always fit, healthy, and really petite–this side of underweight, honestly. But then I gained 80 motherfucking lbs when I was pregnant, because…..food, I guess. Four years later, I’ve lost roughly 65 of those pounds, which puts me at a “healthy weight” and, in clothes, I’m pretty cool with it all. But OMG naked is a totally different story. I still don’t look anything like “me” and at this point, I’m afraid I never will. And what bothers me about this is–I was always in shape, I’m a runner, I coached gymnastics for years, and have always eaten mostly healthy—except for like 1 year of my life. But that one year ruined EVERYTHING. It’s pretty unfair.

    I’m sorry that woman made that comment to you. I would have freaked out. It sounds like you handled it well.

    • Iusedtobealawyer

      Omg! I am so happy someone else is in my position. I was super fit pre-pregnancy and then gained probably 80lbs. (I stopped looking at the numbers after 60lbs) I had preeclampsia which made it all worse. I’m now 8.5 months post partum and about 7lbs from pre-baby weight but it’s all in weird placed. Like why do my jeans now ride up in the front? Wtf is that all about? And when does that cliff from my c-section go down? Granted I worked out a total of maybe 10 times since giving birth bc who the f*#% has the time!? Ugh! I hate how getting back to your pre-baby body has become like some sort of Olympic sport in this country! And F*#* all those celebrity photoshop jerks that try to shame us normal people.

  • biggerthanthesound

    Since October, I have lost 35 lbs through exercise and clean eating. I am the thinnest, and most fit I have ever been in my life. People at my workout place who saw me when I first started, do not recognize me now. I look amazing in most clothes and bought my first pair of leggings. But. My boobs are like empty socks that go concave in pushup bras and my belly looks like a deflated balloon. My youngest is three… the skin is not going anywhere. It’s a little bit of a bummer. But, I’m almost 34 with three kids… so it is what it is. I’m slowly getting comfortable with it. My ass looks okay, though… thanks running.

    • SmrtGrl86

      I lost 37 pounds in two weeks after giving birth, pretty sure I could roll my tummy skin up like a window shade. It looks like I’m smuggling a fucking fanny pack under my pants.

    • http://www.gypsyforlife.blogspot.com/ Trista Crass

      Your secret fanny pack!! I wish it WAS a pouch. At least then I could…stash it full of chocolate that would then melt. Such a mess.

    • SmrtGrl86

      I can carry the TV remote and two pens under my flab now so I guess it’s kinda in a sad sort of way. Maybe I should take up shop lifting or incubating chicken eggs under there…

    • Tinyfaeri

      Time for assless chaps!

      Also, *hug* and I feel you. Having kids does some jacked up things to our bodies. I’ve gotten to the place where I just want to be healthy, and worry about how I look second. Most days that goes pretty well. (knock on wood)

    • biggerthanthesound

      Yeah… I just make sure to have lots of sleeveless stuffs and I’m going to buy a (high waist) bikini this summer. My sister keeps trying to get me to wear leotards. But mostly, I feel freaking amazing and strong. I’m going through kind of a shitty divorce and I think the confidence I have now, not just from what I look like, but because I can run for an hour and rock the workouts at workout land that used to kill me, has helped me do the things I needed to do instead of roll over and give him everything he wanted because I was scared he wouldn’t like me when everything was over (long story in itself). ALSO! I got one sore throat this winter while everyone else got flu. And, maybe this is gross…. but I never have gas unless I eat something with refined sugar/flour. So, that’s really coming in handy now that I’m dating.

    • Tinyfaeri

      *hug* You are amazing and strong and …

      So is she trying to get you to wear leotards on a date, or to the gym? Because on a date might really work… All the kids these days seem to be going out without pants on, why can’t we?

    • biggerthanthesound

      Thank-you! It’s been rough, but I’m going to fucking make it.
      She thinks I should wear leotards always…. so I’m kind of wondering what her outfit choices are going to be when I help her lose weight after she has her baby. Word on the no pants! I live in a college town… wtf, twentysomethings? Through non-official facebook poll of my female friends/family of many ages when I was contemplating purchasing leggings, it’s appropriate for those of us over 30, but everyone over 25 must make sure the butt is covered.

  • SA

    “Sugarlump, let me stop you right there. If you say that sentence to a
    stranger, you had better be drunk, because otherwise, you are being an
    asshole.”

    Hilarious and so true.

    All the ‘differences’ with the post-baby body I can deal with….except for the boobs. They were never big to begin with and now they just feel deflated. Taking my bra off used to be the best part of my day and now I’m looking for pajamas with support just to keep them off my ever-rounded stomach!

    • http://www.gypsyforlife.blogspot.com/ Trista Crass

      Socks full or quarters, man.

      Has your partner ever rolled over on one? How’s that for embarrassing–tugging your boobs out from under a sleeping person?

    • SA

      hahaha! NO, I would die. But, but they constantly get trapped behind my wiggling toddler when she in on my lap. My husband did catch me ‘readjusting’ it out from behind her back to where it should be and asked what I was doing. It was the next day I went and bought a couple new sleep shirts with ‘support’.

    • Alexandra

      OMG LMFAO
      this is awesome!!!
      My girlfriend calls them “rocks in socks”. :)

    • Jessica

      I have very little boobs, even at my most pregnant (& before), they were a tiny 32a. But my nipples can stretch out for a mile (or maybe two inches to be more literal) but I never expected to have to pull my nipple out from under my baby to roll over or to have my nipple stick between my arm & chest :/

    • Itpainsmetosay

      Just a question it might be a little not cool but I want to know because I also have little boobs. Did you breastfeed?

    • Katherine Handcock

      While I do NOT have little boobs, if your question is whether you’ll be able to breastfeed, the answer is as definite a yes as it is for a woman of any boob size! I know someone who never hit a AA cup who nursed both her kids as long as she wanted.

      Said person is also proof that size has NOTHING to do with milk supply. She nursed and also pumped enough to freeze for when she went back to part-time work with no problems at all.

      There are no guarantees with nursing, but if you’re thinking of it/hoping to, don’t worry about the boob size.

    • Itpainsmetosay

      Um I was asking Jessica Not because I think women who have little boobs can’t breastfeed because after all that’s kind of what boobs are for mainly. I was asking because I have heard that when you breastfeed your boobs go through a bigger change than if you don’t. In other words if I don’t breastfeed will my boobs still stretch and I don’t mean get bigger because that’s inevitable.
      P.s I’m not and wont be pregnat any time soon also the boob thing is not defining aspect of my decision to breastfeed

    • Jessica

      My boobs didn’t get bigger during pregnancy even a little bit. I had heard so many times, just wait until you get pregnant, you’ll have so much boob you won’t know what to do with it! I kept waiting & waiting but those wonder boobs never came. But it’s probably a good thing, because my boobs look pretty much the same as they were pre-pregnancy. My nipples (well all of my skin actually) have always been on the stretchy side, but nursing made them even stretchier. They aren’t long & droopy & I was afraid of my nipples looking like my mom’s (so much tmi in my comment, sorry!) She nursed three kids, the last one for more than a couple years, & hers are a little long & almost balled up at the ends.

      Nursing didn’t wreck my boobs, I doubt anyone that saw them would be able to tell I breastfeed at all. They don’t look emptied & I didn’t get any stretch marks. So it’s possible that you can go through pregnancy & breastfeeding with minimal changes to your boobs. It’s probably not the norm, but it happens.

    • Katherine Handcock

      Sorry, didn’t mean to jump in – I just come from an area where the #1 breastfeeding misconception is that women with “small” breasts can’t nurse/won’t have enough milk (of course, nobody ever defines what “small” means in this context.) I shouldn’t have assumed that was your question!

    • Itpainsmetosay

      No its cool at first I thought you were saying that I called her boobs small and was being offensive. I understood where you were coming from now but why do those people think that, isn’t it more about genetics, diet, and a little luck.

    • Katherine Handcock

      Oh, definitely not! And you’re right, it’s a combination of factors, although there are some things you can do to make nursing more comfortable if it hurts or to encourage/boost supply if it seems like you don’t have enough.
      The area around where I live had at least two generations that were completely discouraged from nursing, and there were a lot of myths that sprung up about why. Some are probably because some of the women wouldn’t have been hugely healthy or well-fed, since it was a poor community at the time – the idea that you wouldn’t have enough milk or that formula was better for the baby probably came from that. But some just came from a total lack of familiarity, and the boob size one probably is one of those. In a way, it’s sort of understandable if you have no idea how it works to think that larger breasts = more milk.
      I have had to reassure women that increased nursing during a baby’s growth spurt doesn’t mean that the baby is starving to death, that they can eat meat/fish/vegetables while they are nursing, and even that their milk won’t curdle or spoil in their breast. So I have such an emotional reaction to questions that sound like that, because these were all women who desperately wanted to nurse, but thought that their bodies just weren’t capable of it.

    • Jessica

      I actually just weaned my daughter about 2 weeks ago. She’ll be 2 in March. I never intended to nurse so long, be she had a hard time with solids. Not really a hard time, just really picky & wouldn’t eat them. She was about 50/60 percentile for weight when she was younger, but when we started pushing solids harder, closer to 1 year, she slid down to 15th percentile. She was still healthy, but I didn’t want to take away the one place I knew she was getting lots of nutrients

      Long story short, I don’t think my tiny boobs made breastfeeding difficult & I think my stretchy nipples helped. But my daughter was born rooting & seemed to know what to do. So I take zero credit for breastfeeding so easily.

    • Itpainsmetosay

      Happy early birthday to her! When I say its a give in that they will get bigger I sort of meant b/c my mom and her sister who had children both gained a lot in the chest and tum area so I always assumed I would too but mine didn’t breastfeed so when the time comes I can’t ask her about it. Also all my cosines are more well endowed then my sister and I so they are no help.

    • Katherine Handcock

      OMG I thought I was the only one that happened to! Although in my case, it’s usually one of the kids, snuggling up after a bad dream or something.

    • EmmaFromÉire

      My boyfriend managed to get one wedged under his elbow the other week and it was literally the most mortifying thing ever. I have fairly large boobs, and hate wearing bras around the house, but i think that’s just changed…

    • rrlo

      I wish I had taken some naked glamour shots before having my first child. Too late now :(.

  • Momma425

    The same thing happened to me. I have always been larger- I gained 35 pounds when pregnant and tipped the scale at over 200lbs. I was HORRIFIED. After baby was born, I didn’t follow advice and started exercising pretty much as soon as I could get out of bed after my c-section. I didn’t breastfeed and figured I could stop eating altogether- weight literally FELL off. I didn’t look the same at all when I finally “fit” back into my pre-mom jeans. Instead of being toned and cute, I just had all this sagging extra skin.
    I exercised for a year, every day, religiously. I did start eating again, but my diet was very strict- fruits and veggies and lean protien only. It was never good enough. Every inch I lost…I had all this extra skin just hanging out that wouldn’t go away. Finally- I saw my doctor. He suggested I see a plastic surgeon to get rid of extra skin. I felt awful. I know a lot of people who have had plastic surgery procedures and that is wonderful, but I don’t believe in that for me personally.
    I finally decided that I would rather be fat. I have been much happier since.
    I think people should stop commenting on other’s bodies altogether. Seriously. None of anyone’s business.

    • http://www.gypsyforlife.blogspot.com/ Trista Crass

      Holy crap lady! I hope you’re taking care of yourself and eating again! One thing that I realized about surgery a while ago, is that it’s not a fix-all. We see it as such because everyone in media is so photoshopped that it looks like magic. But I’ve known about a dozen people that have gotten surgery (including skin removal) and it doesn’t end. There are scars, doctors miss spots, you might have to go in for follow-ups. It seems a lot easier/healthier just to roll with what you’ve got!

    • Alexandra

      That is true – there are serious scars espesh for tummy tucks, you’ll have a “belt scar” which is basically a scar that looks like a belt encircling your waist. Google tummy tucks and you’ll see it. not everyone’s cup of tea.

    • http://www.gypsyforlife.blogspot.com/ Trista Crass

      Better yet, YOUTUBE ‘em.

      What I meant was that if you hate yourself, no amount of cutting and scraping will fix it, you know? You’ll find something else. You’ve got to look deeper than your stomach fat to love yourself.

      BRB gotta puke over what I just said. I hate feelings!

    • Tinyfaeri

      Amen, and me too. I’m sending you a virtual hair-holding-back.

    • Momma425

      Oh yeah. I’m eating. I’m over 200lbs now- and happy, and fine. I decided I am one of those people who looks better fat- and I’m okay with that. I lost the weight, I did it- and I was not happy with the results. So…I gotta love me for me. And donuts. And cake. Love those things too!

    • http://www.gypsyforlife.blogspot.com/ Trista Crass

      It’s totally a thing. I got skinny once, and I looked horrific. Skeletor. I DID look good in literally every piece of clothing, but I still didn’t like it. Never again.

    • Alexandra

      Wow, my normal weight is around 140 but I’m already at 230 with this pregnancy (twins, but still). I hope magical unicorns bring fairy dust down to help me lose my Kardashian ass cause it’s fucking frightening.
      However, I would be 100% in favor of PS if that’s what it takes, no stigma here! Whatever feels good for YOU!

  • JustAGuest

    “I realize that I wasn’t deathfat when I was pregnant”

    Yeah, you lost my sympathy right here. For a site that’s usually pretty accepting of women who aren’t slender, I’m rather appalled that anyone would consider this a reasonable term. If you want to call yourself names in your own brain, that’s your own issue to deal with. However, personally I find knowing that you would refer to someone obese as “deathfat” rates you much further down my “decent human being” scale than someone who makes a well-intentioned, if inappropriate, comment to try to be empowering/encouraging.

    • http://www.gypsyforlife.blogspot.com/ Trista Crass

      I am kind of an appalling person.

    • A

      Deathfat could mean morbidly obese.
      No different from saying “skeletal skinny” also not flattering, but seriously…
      Chillax

    • YouHaveTheInternet

      “Deathfat” is a thing. It is a term that Leslie Kinzel started using as a way to change how we talk about people’s bodies: how absurd the language is and how many different ways there are to be fat. She does a lot of work in the body acceptance world. I’m sorry that you were so offended by someone using the jargon of a body acceptance community that you are quick to say the author isn’t a part of, but you are willingly ignorant to.

  • http://wtfihaveakid.blogspot.ca/ jendra_berri

    Oh, I feel you. I’m rather re-arranged, myself. My stomach is a sad affair. I think my rib cage expanded. It’s not a look I enjoy, and I too am doing the leggings things. Pregnancy leggings. They have that delightful panel that makes me feel all held in. I had to get rid of so many cute dresses.

    I’m happy you told that woman what you thought. Maybe next time she won’t feel so keen to tell other women how to feel about their bodies.

  • Toaster

    I’ve been so depressed by my body lately, if some random person in the grocery line had told me to be proud of my body I would just burst into tears. I’m overweight but working on losing it, and I’m 10lbs below my post-pregnancy weight, and I still don’t come close to fitting into my clothes from when I weighed this much pre-kids. Sigh.

  • Picklejar

    First of all – thanks for the Sir Digby Chicken Ceasar reference. I can relate to so much of this article. I lost my pregnancy weight pretty fast – but was astounded at how soft and floppy everything was, (even my calves – super floppy), and how the shape wasn’t quite right. Over time, things are settling back into place, and tightening up (a bit) – though my boobs remain magnificent. Accepting this new version of me has been a process – it’s mostly the same, but slightly different. When I was about 8 & 441/2 months pregnant, and waddling down the street, I passed a mother carrying her 5 month old in arms, and she smiled at me and said “You look beautiful.” and we all kept walking. I felt so amazing! She saw my sheen of sweat as an angelic glow! I’ll give the lady in the supermarket the benefit of the doubt and
    assume the intention was supposed to be positive – but she should have
    kept the sentiment (You’re beautiful!) and left off the commentary on
    how you dress.

  • Natasha B

    This is my favorite piece on mommyish this week. You rock.

    • FormerlyKnownAsWendy

      Ugh. I just really wanted to like it, but not my cup of tea, I guess…

  • Guest

    I have a thyroid condition which has plagued me my whole life and makes weight loss nearly impossible. I started researching alternative options, but lost my drive to get fit. I convinced myself that I could live with being fat my whole life. But then I found this article, and read about how your life changed when you lost the weight.
    I wouldn’t be admitting this if it weren’t an anonymous comment but after reading this I finally resolved to start using laxatives in conjunction with my diet pills and thyroid medication. In addition I’ve devised a healthy vegetarian diet and increased my exercise routine. That was three days ago and I’ve already lost four pounds.
    I know it seems extreme but I know that the faster I lose the weight the sooner I can go back to a normal albeit healthier lifestyle.
    I’ve been incredibly unhappy and very sensitive about my weight my whole life so this is very exciting for me. I can’t wait to do what I want, wear what I want and experience everything I couldn’t up till now. And whenever I feel like I don’t want to do my exercises or I want to eat a nice juicy steak for dinner instead of a salad I find you article again and read your story.
    Life IS better for skinny people.

    Keep writing.

    • kara

      Please seek therapy, please for your mental a nd physical health

    • http://www.gypsyforlife.blogspot.com/ Trista Crass

      It DOES take dedication to lose weight, but don’t try to do it with laxatives. Number one, it just doesn’t fucking work in the long run, an instead you’ll lose a couple pounds right off the bat, and then nothing. Trust. It also wrecks your digestive system in a big way, and that can actually make you gain MORE weight back.

      I’m stoked that you’ve devised a good diet, that’s the place to start. You should read Michael Pollan’s “In defense of food” if you haven’t–it’s a really good refresher on healthy eating, super fun/easy to read, and full of the easiest diet information you’ll ever read.

      I totally understand the desire to just be thin NOW. But unless you get there by changing shit drastically, it won’t last. And there is nothing worse than losing weight and then gaining it right back. If you want to try something extreme, think about juicing, and juice fasting. It’s surprisingly good for you, and easy to lose weight quick with it. ‘Fat Sick and Nearly Dead’ is a good, free (should be?) documentary about one man’s quest to get healthy juicing, and you should see it.

      Hurting your body with pills isn’t going to help you reach your long-term goals of being fit and healthy. And the worst part, it’ll rob you of your energy doing it. JUICE! I’m serious, it’s good for you, and you can have that steak and eat it too–in moderation :D

    • Guest

      The laxatives made me sick, so I stopped. I also discontinued the diet pills because I decided I didn’t want to rely on them for my weight loss. Now I’m just losing weight through diet and exercise. I mostly eat celery during the day and bits of that and this. I just make sure to take in less than 500 calories a day. And I’ve now tripled my exercise routin. My diet really started to take off about a week after I left that first comment and I’ve lost more than twenty pounds in the last three weeks. I’m so amazingly excited! It’s finally happening. I’ve been trying on and off to lose weight for years and it never worked.
      And before anyone says anything, this is the only way for me to beat my defective thyroid. It’s kept me fat for nineteen years and made my life completely miserable because of comments like “life is better for skinny people”. But it wouldn’t upset me so much if it weren’t true. I know I’m taking certain risks right now with my diet, but I would rather die trying than do nothing than be one of the fat slobs who has no control over their weight.

  • Cdubbus

    Nice!