46272865Oh, Thought Catalog – you’re not even amusing anymore. Why such a need to scrape the shallow end of the decency pool to find writers? You’ve really out-trolled yourself today with David Dunning‘s piece, Congratulations You’ve Vaccinated Your Child And Now They’re Retarded. 

Dunning presents the scientifically-debunked argument that vaccinations cause a litany of horrors to young children – and he does so without using science, links or facts. Good job. He somehow scraped his knuckles off the floor long enough to pound on his keyboard and produce this offensive and completely without merit nonsense-article:

You probably didn’t even think twice. Your newborn child had only been on this earth for 5 hours, yet they were in grave danger. The hookers and heroin addicts were getting closer and you could sense them. Your infant needed protection. So, you told the nurse to do it. You breathed a sigh of relief as the needle plunged into their pristine pink flesh. The Hepatitis B virus, aluminum, formaldehyde, and various carrying agents attacked your child’s immature immune system, vital organs and brain. But, you had done it. You were a hero. You had protected them against a virus they had virtually no chance of contracting.

No links. Nothing to support his argument. Nada. So here’s one for you:

According to information provided by the Immunization Action Coalition and the CDC, an estimated 1.25 million people are chronically infected with the hepatitis B virus in the United States alone, resulting in an estimated 2,000-4,000 deaths each year.  Surprisingly, 30%-40% of these chronic infections were acquired during childhood.  This fact alone presents a compelling case for vaccinating infants – before they become infected… Parents need to understand that the hepatitis B virus can be spread by infectious blood and body fluids, and not solely through sexual contact. Since only 7 out of 10 infected adults show any signs or symptoms, and infected children under age 5 rarely show any symptoms at all, it is obvious how the infected population can easily, and unknowingly, be transmitting the disease to others.

He then goes on to dribble more nonsense:

Many of you are stuck in your Santa Claus, Jesus, and teddy bear bubbles. Here are some facts. In the 1980’s children were given 23 doses of 7 different vaccines. In the 2010’s, children are being given 69 doses of 16 different vaccines. This is more than triple the number of vaccines received by most of the reading audience. Per the CDC’s website, some of the most common vaccine ingredients are aluminum, formaldehyde, bovine extract, preservatives, and mercury. It is a fact, that it is not scientifically known how the body metabolizes many of these ingredients. Look it up.

We wouldn’t have to look it up if you just provided a link, dummy. Hasn’t anyone explained to you how the Internet works? Here’s one:

As science progresses, children and adults are protected against more and more vaccine-preventable diseases. In the 1920s, there was just one vaccine: smallpox. At that time, hundreds of thousands of children got diphtheria—many of them died from it. By the 1950s there were five vaccines, including one for diphtheria, but still tens of thousands of children got sick from bacterial diseases such as meningitis or pneumonia caused by Hib or pneumococcus. Today we have vaccines for diseases that used to affect children every day. Healthy communities prove that immunizations are working.

Mercury has not been used in vaccinations since 2001. Trace amounts are still used as a preservative in the flu vaccine, “but the amount of mercury in a flu vaccine is five times less than in a tuna sandwich. A baby who breast feeds for six months gets 25 times more mercury than is in a single dose of flu vaccine.” I don’t even know why I am throwing facts at this.

It’s like having accidentally used arsenic instead of salt on your family’s Thanksgiving turkey. Of course, you don’t want to tell anyone. Some of them are going to get sick and die, and the rest are going to want to kick your ass. It’s time to man up. Let’s start talking about the things that matter. Your children should be at the top of that list.

Offensive title. Stupid article. The end.

(photo: memegenerator)