• Wed, Feb 12 - 10:35 am ET

Politically Correct School Policies Never Fail To Suck The Fun Out Of Valentine’s Day

Young Boy Embarrassed Holding Heart Shaped BoxI was just talking with my husband last night about all of the hokey Valentine’s Day traditions I remember when I was in school.

In elementary school, it was Valentine’s Day mailboxes and adorable Valentine’s Day parties for the class. In middle school, right about the time when kids got interested in “romantic” love, there were endless opportunities to prove your undying devotion to a crush—or kiss the popular girls’ asses—by sending Valentine’s carnations.

The carnations cost only a dollar, and I vividly remember sending a handful to my group of girlfriends every year. I don’t remember ever receiving a carnation from a boy or a special Secret Admirer, though I secretly hoped year after year.

I know in all of these superfluous carnation exchanges, there were inevitably kids left out. I wasn’t on the most popular rung of the social ladder, so I had some of those feelings. I always wondered why the very popular girls got more carnations from the very popular boys and why a boy had yet to send one to me.

But I survived, and I lived to tell about it. Maybe if my middle school had been more like this ultra-PC elementary school, I never would have had these memories because life would have been fair, fair, fair.

Parents at a New Jersey elementary school tweeted a picture of a Valentine’s Day bulletin sent home from class. Children were only allowed to exchange Valentine cards at school if they brought a card for each classmate.

vday-hurt-feelings

From my understanding, passing out Valentines to an entire class is a fairly common practice; my two-year-old is doing it at daycare this week. What I’m surprised to see is this new policy of “avoiding hurt feelings” on every major occasion by making classroom interaction 100% fair.

I’m sure we can all agree in the real world that life isn’t fair. While kindergarten may not be the best place to teach the hard knocks of life, kids have to learn some time. Interacting with other kids, taking a risk in professing your undying love, and sometimes going home empty-handed—this is all part of the process. Shielding kids from hurt feelings takes the fun out of Valentine’s Day and isn’t doing them any favors.

(photo: Getty Images)

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  • WantonWhimsy

    I’m really confused by this statement “Shielding kids from hurt feelings takes the fun out of Valentine’s Day and isn’t doing them any favors.”
    Exactly how does ensuring that every child is included take the fun out of valentine’s day? Are there valentine day celebrations that are focused on just making sure people feel left out and like garbage? Also, how does it not do kindergartners (which is the example used in this…. umm, piece) favors to not make them feel singled/left out? Nothing cited or put forth in the piece supported that summation.
    I’m glad that our public schools are doing their best to ensure that kids learn acceptance, tolerance and just basic kindness from an early age because it’s obviously something that’s not going to be taught in all homes so as not to “take the fun out of” using holidays to inflict hurt on random people.

  • Teal

    Umm…having the kids make/send a Valentine to each kid in the class has been done for decades. I don’t see the problem here.

  • melly henderson

    damn straight! don’t be letting those kindergarteners experience ANYTHING that isn’t how it is in the REAL grown up world! i bet you don’t pander to that ridiculous notion of Santa Claus, or the tooth fairy either, thank goodness! and i bet you don’t make your kids share, ensure they bathe properly, or insist they pick up anything either, because. you know, in the REAL WORLD, you have to do all those things for yourself. nobody helps you or reminds you when you’re all grown up! you make sure those kindergarteners know the harsh realities of the real world! (and for those who can’t tell, yes, that was sarcasm.) seriously, get a grip. passing out cards for the whole class is very old hat. i did that, and i just turned 35. so, THIRTY YEARS ago, they were doing this. you’re ridiculous.

  • madison

    that sucks. at my party today a boy in my class gave just me a valentine and the teacher riped it in half. i didnt even get to read it. :(

  • Guest

    I’m 34 and I can remember valentine cards being an “everyone or no one” proposition in elementary school. You either brought enough for everyone in the class, or didn’t bring them at all. Although I’m not generally a fan of the “everyone gets a medal” mentality, I really believe that Valentine’s Day is about love, kindness and inclusion, and is the perfect opportunity to impart these values. At the elementary school age (and especially in kindergarten!), kids should not feel left out or disliked on Valentine’s Day because they didn’t receive any valentines.

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