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The 10 Naughty Lego Positions For Adults Only

legoThe only association I have with Legos is the searing pain and blinding rage I feel whenever I step on one of those little fuckers in a dimly lit living room. I’ve never been sexually attracted to a Lego, but these days, I’m open to anything that may spice up my marital bed.

I’ve started looking at Lego porn, and I am addicted. I may need to go to a meeting, perhaps a sub-chapter of Sex Addicts Anonymous. Once you delve into this amazing Lego porn, you’ll probably become an addict too. And then you’ll be looking at it all the time in the bathroom on your iPhone, and everyone will be ashamed of you, and you’ll probably lose your most important relationships.

So check out this Lego porn at your own risk. If you fall down a slippery shame spiral and become sexually attracted to Legos, that’s really not my problem because I told you not to. If you need help with your addiction, you’re going to have to seek out other Lego lovers that are into freaky freak plastic porn because they are the only people that can help you now.

Shield your eyes, or get your downloading finger ready, whatever you prefer. Here’s the best Lego porn that you’ll ever find on the Internet:

*Note: My husband also pointed out that Legos are HARD ALL THE TIME, which might be why they’re so successful in the porn industry. It just makes sense. No fluffers needed.

1. A Lovely Lego Porn Star With A Nice, Hard Rack

mattsbrickgallery.tumblr.com

mattsbrickgallery.tumblr.com

2. Just Your Typical Lego Orgy, No Big

wickedfire.com

wickedfire.com

3. Just Your Typical Lego Three-Way

lego84. Legos Like It From Behind

forum.santabanta.com

forum.santabanta.com

5. A Lego Returning The Favor

ticklingforum.com

ticklingforum.com

6. Legos Fulfill Your Creepiest Sex Fantasies

lego_porn_12

7. Lego S&M, For Very Bad Boys

lego3

boingboing.net

8. Angry, Bearded Lego Sex

slicktiger.wordpress.com

slicktiger.wordpress.com

9. Legos Caught In The Act

forum.bodybuilding.com

forum.bodybuilding.com

10. Lego Star Wars Bondage, For A Very Niche Market

fumaga.com

fumaga.com

(photo: joeyeattaco.deviantart.com)

Share This Post:
  • Tea

    Erg, these women look so fake. Lego porn sets a terrible example for lego girls.

    • Bethany Ramos

      Hahahhaha

  • CMJ

    I’m a little upset that the Lego Strip Club was not included in this post.

    • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

      wait, right? SHEESH

  • Robotic Arms Dealer
    • pineapplegrasss

      I think we have enough spare parts to make this one:)

  • Megan Zander

    Anyone else bothered by the fact that #4 is Harry Potter and that is clearly NOT Ginny?

    • pineapplegrasss

      #4 hes pulling her hair oh lol

    • Rainbowsandapplesauce

      I suspect it’s Cho, but since she isn’t crying, I’m not convinced.

    • Megan Zander

      LOLOLOLOL all of my up votes, I give them to you.

  • Julia Sonenshein

    Can never unsee. BRILLIANT.

  • ShanLea

    Oh my gawd….I just recovered my laptop from its unfortunate coffee bath, just in time to see this! For some reason, I want to go get the bin of legos from my preteen’s room and burn them in the yard-this explains why he won’t let me put them in storage yet!!

  • aCongaLine

    This is the most hilarious thing I’ve seen all day (read: ever). Thanks for a much needed laugh :)

  • Evenaar

    Am I the only one who thinks no. 6 is the odd one out? In the sense that the joke in all the other ones seems to be: Hehe lego characters in compromising situations. Except with this one, where the only way I can conceive of this being made is as specifically anti-muslim. I was like: Lol, lol, lol, lo…. oh wait this is actually quite scary and derisive…

  • FormerlyKnownAsWendy

    All I could think of when I saw the Lego orgy one is how expensive that must be….that’s an awful lot of Lego guys, and Lego guys ain’t cheap. Almost easier to hire porn actors :)

  • bob

    I’d just like to point out that quite a few of these (at least 8 and 5) are from the brick testament, which illustrates bible stories with Legos. Google it and Enjoy!

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  • MamaLlama

    I cannot believe I just looked at this from my work IPAD. I thought ‘how bad could Legos be?’ And once you click on the link, you might as well just give in. Oy vey!

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  • Kay_Sue

    I can tell this post is fantasy because the only position Legos actually take is whichever one will inflict the absolute most searing pain in your foot….

  • Momma425

    Maybe it’s just me… But those policeman Legos are hot!

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  • arrow2010

    Should have been labeled NSFW…

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  • John Jimbo

    take this job and shove it. i aint what the fuck homey.

  • John Jimbo

    fucking cunt sauce.

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