Broke Parents-To-Be Don’t Want To Hear About Your Stupid Babymoon

bikiniSo many things going on on the Facebook these days, especially now that my 30-something friends are all having babies. So instead of seeing rando drunk Facebook posts on the feed at two in the morning, I’m seeing babies, weddings, babies, and did I say babies?

Before the baby comes the babymoon, or at least that’s what reality TV stars would like you to believe. But wait—if you read any mom-friendly parenting website, you’ll quickly discover that babymoons are a thing. A babymoon is a thing you’re supposed to do, a rite of passage, a trip you must take before you pop out your baby, or it will come out with horns. Just kidding. But maybe you should take one just to be on the safe side.

On my Facebook feed, I’ve seen a few posts tagged with #babymoon nonsense. This makes me feel one of two ways. 1.) Oooh fun! Just the thing you need before your life is forever changed by a screaming baby. Jamaica, anyone? 2.) Correct me if I’m wrong, but most parents I know are strapped for cash preparing to buy a crib, diapers, and formula for a kid. I seriously doubt babymoons are on the agenda for the general population.

Full disclosure, my husband and I took a few kid-free trips while I was pregnant with both of my sons. I guess those could have been considered #babymoons, but I certainly wasn’t bragging on my Facebook feed about how me and my bump were living it up.

My husband and I make a comfortable income, so scheduled vacations are something we budget for to save our sanity. But they are still a luxury, and I totally get the fact that many parents can’t afford a getaway.

Every time I see the #babymoon phenomenon clogging up my newsfeed, all I can think of is how much a broke parent struggling to work full time and still pay for daycare would want to throttle the glowing pregnant lady sipping orange juice on the beach. Babymoons seem like a great idea in an alternate universe with unlimited funds, but for the rest of the real world parents out there, let’s keep bragging to a minimum.

(photo: Getty Images)

You can reach this post's author, Bethany Ramos, on twitter.
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    • LaceyBabona

      I understand the sentiment (no way in hell are we having anything resembling a babymoon) but I feel like telling women to not share theirs on fb is like the time a woman told me not to complain about my stretchmarks because it would offend women that couldn’t have children at all. Um…no?

      • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

        Oh man I can’t believe someone said that to you hahahaha

      • Tinyfaeri

        Those might just be the same people who answer everything bad with “at least you don’t have cancer/something else even more horrible than whatever you were complaining about.”

      • Edify

        I have a friend that responds to people all the time with “meanwhile in Africa” when some complains of something. Drives me nuts.

    • Marie

      I sort of agree, but I don’t see why babymoon bragging is any worse than any of the other ways people brag about their spending habits. All those lists of “baby essentials” showing expensive baby items that are anything but essential and implying that you’re less of a mom for not buying the top rated $600 car seat or the fancy video monitor? Huge photo spreads of gorgeous designer nurseries when you’re thankful to be able to afford the basics? Babymoon bragging may just be the latest of examples of the rift between the haves and have nots, but it’s nothing new.

      • Surly Canuck

        Yeah, I’m not sure how this is any different than the mom who asked her childless friends to stop putting up their travel pics on Facebook because they were giving her a case of the sads.
        Ignore, unfollow or unfriend… There are options.

      • Guest

        True. I think when stuff like that bothers people it is because A) They already hate that person or B) They’re really jealous and insecure. The name is stupid though.

    • Givemeabreak

      Don’t like it don’t read it???

      • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

        No, because you know what is the most fun? Reading these #humblebrags and then bitching about it.

      • Bethany Ramos

        #howdareyou

      • Givemeabreak

        I like it when my fun involves things like cold Coors Light and Norman Reedus :-) But hey whatever floats your boat!

      • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

        WHY MUST YOU DRAG NORMAN REEDUS INTO EVERYTHING #HOWDAREYOU http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m76afw9Wlr1rp62eq.gif

      • Givemeabreak

        BECAUSE HE IS PRETTY AND I HAVE A PROBLEM!!! #wtfarethesethingsidonotknowhatiamdoing

      • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter
      • Givemeabreak

        I don’t know if that is really uber cute… or scary as shit..

      • Givemeabreak

        either way I’m laughing and my boss is looking at me like I’ve dropped my basket

      • Julia Sonenshein

        THIS IS THE ONLY FUN.

    • G.E. Phillips

      Ha! My “babymoon” was a chicken dinner and a Guiness from the pub down the street from my house, at 3 days overdue. I guess I could pretend it was actually a 2 hour trip to Ireland….

      • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

        This sounds pretty good to me

      • Bethany Ramos

        Sign me up!

      • Alexandra

        Yum agree :)
        I want a Guinness!!

    • Anna

      This logic could be applied to everything in life. Don’t share pictures/stories about your expensive car, wedding, home, vacation, kitchen remodel, new pool, etc. because I can’t afford it.

      I have friends that did a babymoon and went to places that I can’t even afford to travel to as a childless person. You know what. I was happy for them.

      • Larkin

        This reminds me of the recent story where an anonymous Facebook “friend” sent that couple a letter telling them to stop posting about their vacations, because lots of people can’t afford them, and to stop being so selfish and have some kids already.

        If someone’s posts really bother you, hide them. But I’m not going to begrudge my friends the right to post about their lives just because I’m bitter I can’t afford a fancy trip. In fact, I usually eat up those vacation albums… it’s like I can go on vacation by proxy. Haha.

    • Mikster

      Wow. Envy is not a very attractive thing. no one told people to have babies while they are broke, and iof they choose to, don’t begrudge others their vacays. that said, it’s been 17 YEARS since I had a vacay with the hubster, so I am NOT in the babymoon group. I just focus on being grateful for the things I have in life that really matter.

      • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

        I am jealous you used the words “vacay” and “hubster” in the same sentence

      • Mikster

        ROFL…..

    • LadyClodia

      My baby didn’t come out with horns. :( Can I get a refund?

      • Tinyfaeri

        I kind of wanted mine to have a tail. I even spent a while looking into it to see if there was the small possibility that we had a recessive gene in there somewhere, or if it would help if I went to a nuclear power plant for a few hours.

      • LadyClodia

        Yeah, at first I thought him having a prehensile tail would be cool then I realized that it would only make my life that much more difficult.
        Pointed ears would have been my first choice.

      • EX

        Agreed. My daughter definitely does not need an appendage that would make her a better climber. She didn’t have pointed ears but they were hairy so she looked kind of like a werewolf. Which was pretty awesome.

    • jane

      Normally I think your stuff is hysterical, but this one just struck me as jealous and petty. If they had tagged it #beachvacation would it magically have been better? How about this #hashtagsonfacebookareannoying #ironicuseonly #ifyourestillonfacebookyourenolongerahipstersoGTFUwiththehashtagshit?

      • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

        idk, I am pretty much always jealous, right now I am jealous of people who have their laundry done :(

      • Bethany Ramos

        #laundryjelly

      • Véronique Houde

        omg me too….. I need to do it but I know that I’ll have to fuck up my back again in the process and I DON’T WANT TO BE IN PAIN… So… Should I choose to wear dirty underwear, or have back pain for the rest of the week? :( :( :(

      • Jules

        You could be a baller and buy new underwear so you don’t have to wash the ones you have now :P

      • Véronique Houde

        ORRRR go without.

    • Megan Zander

      I took a preggo vacay, so I shouldn’t judge, BUT a friend of a friend took a trip when her baby was 6 months old because she didn’t get to go on a baby moon and she felt her husband owed it to her. The left their daughter to be watched by two other couples, neither of which have children. And then they went to Disney World. Not a resort where they could get their freak on, but the most kid friendly place on earth- without their baby. Call me a sanctimommy, but I judge that crap out of that. Baby moons are great, but no one is OWED one for getting knocked up IMO.

      • Bethany Ramos

        I don’t get that!!! People can vacation wherever, but I have never wanted to go to Disney without kids. Maybe I am dead inside. But I do have several friends that went to Disney often pre-kids!

      • That_Darn_Kat

        My husband and I are planning a (6 years later) honeymoon for later this year…we’re totally doing Disneyland. We love DL and would much rather go there instead of Vegas. I’ve always loved DL, even as a teen, and can’t wait!

      • Bethany Ramos

        Confession: I had a really effed up Disney experience on a divorce trip with my dad when I was 12 or so. Maybe that has colored my POV? I still want to go with my kids!

      • That_Darn_Kat

        I imagine that might have something to do with it. We took our kids for the first time last year. We’re taking them again in 2-3 weeks, but this time it’s a surprise. We originally told my oldest (7) that we couldn’t do it this year. Now that we can, we’re surprising them…they’re gonna freak (in a good way).

      • Bethany Ramos

        That is so sweet! I probably need Disney cognitive behavioral therapy.

      • Véronique Houde

        Maybe they want to do the adult rides together lol!!!

      • EX

        My mind must be in the gutter because the term “adult” rides made me chortle.

      • Ddaisy

        Personally, I can’t imagine doing Disney WITH kids. I’m one of those wait-at-the-rope-in-the-morning, stay-for-the-last-parade, and jam-in-every-single-roller-coaster kind of people. I also really like the “boring” parts of the park with the historical/educational stuff.

        Standing in endless lines to get autographs or riding in circles on Dumbo sounds like the worst possible way to spend a Disney vacation.

        Don’t get me wrong, if you’re one of those people that loves Disney with kids, then I fully support you! But it’s just not my (Mad Hatter’s spinning) cup of tea!

      • Bethany Ramos

        See, now you made it sound all fun. ;)

      • Alexandra

        Hmmm, honestly, I know people who (as adults) love Disneyworld. One couple was thinking of being married there. And I can think of a bunch of reasons why, for those people, being there with a 6 month old would be much less fun than being able to go on your own. Also, while Disney is KID friendly, no where you have to walk 8 hours a day is “baby” friendly enough IMO.
        Also, I (up until 3 months from now – childless) have taken care of friend’s babies, and I don’t think anyone was scarred for life….so I’m not sure the relevance of the issue of leaving a baby with two couples with no children??

      • Aldonza

        …for Christmas a few years ago my boyfriend (now husband) got us a trip to Disney World because I’d never been (originally a West Coaster so family was strictly Disneyland). It was the best! Epic days, lots of rides, so many parks! And Epcot serves alcohol! Of course, I also play with Lego’s, still flip out over Christmas and spend large portions of my days playing theatre games with children, so I’m basically a ten year old in an adult body who also enjoys slasher films.

      • koolchicken

        Can I agree with you. I love Disney and I’m an adult. I’m actually going again this month. But we waited to take my son for the first time until he was a year because going prior to that would have been too much work. Once a kid can walk, talk, and eat solids your life is sooo much easier. So take it from a person who’s been on countless vacations with their kid (the first was technically at less than a week old but I don’t like to count it). A six month old on any vacation is not a vacation, it is working in a more difficult location.

        I only wish I could have left my six month old with someone and gone to Disney. This chick might be on to something…

      • Megan Zander

        We actually honeymooned in Disney, and took of trips there before our twins were born, we took them for the first time at 7 months, so I’m biased. And people without babies can absolutely babysit, no question, I think I was more judgy bc of this individual and her attitude. She literally wanted to go there because she wanted to tell poeple about her babymoon, and they had a discount, not that they wanted to go there, she just worried about what people thought since they didn’t go one one before the baby was born, And the babysitters are still enjoying the swinging single scene and she left the baby with them without a car seat base. Honestly, I feel silly typing this, if I was on the outside I would think I’m being rediculous too, thanks for making me see the light. I just don’t get along with this girl and maybe I’m looking for reasons to justify that.

    • Rene

      We have become such a society of whiners. If seeing someone who has what you do not, whether it is the money to take a vacation or if they have kids and you can’t or whatever else you covet, and it bothers you to the point of thinking they shouldn’t post about it because it makes you feel bad, social media is likely not the place for you.

      • sally

        Amen to this. They say comparison is the thief of joy. If someone having more than you do bothers you then stop looking at it and evaluate why it makes you feel bad.

    • airbones

      No fair! I went on a #babymoon and my baby still came out with horns!

      • Bethany Ramos

        LOL!

      • airbones

        Is it because the Jersey shore doesn’t qualify as a babymoon?

      • MerlePerle

        I think the Jersey Shore is where most babies catch the prenatal horn syndrome. Sorry, should have gone to Jamaica!

      • airbones

        Someone should raise awareness.

    • Tinyfaeri

      I think the term “babymoon” is as stupid as “mommy juice” for wine (or adding “mommy” to anything), but if you can swing it, great. Should I begrudge any of my friends and family a beach vacation (or any vacation) just because I can’t afford it? Is posting a picture of vacation considered bragging, or just the normal level of sharing that people do on Facebook? “Look! I’m eating something in Hawaii instead of DC!” (true story, it happened to my friend)

      • Bethany Ramos

        I think you hit the nail on the head because the name bugs me the most. Like I said in the post, it wasn’t necessarily the money that was the issue because we also traveled while I was pregnant.

      • Guest

        They could probs just call it a vacation like the rest of us.

      • Williwaw

        I totally agree. I don’t care if people talk about their vacations, pregnant or not, but the word “babymoon” is annoying.

        However, do people take these babymoons early in pregnancy? It seems like they would have to, because don’t some airlines refuse to fly you once you’re past a certain stage of pregnancy? Also, I don’t think I could have enjoyed a pregnant beach vacation even if I’d taken one. I’d have just looked like some sort of giant pale beached Mariana Trench invertebrate that is too weak to support its bloated body while out of water.

      • Bethany Ramos

        hahaha your description is perfectly amazing! I don’t know the etiquette, but I’m thinking it somewhere in the second trimester. I traveled at around 7 months with both kids, but my midwife was cool with it.

      • Véronique Houde

        Like I mentioned above, the allow you, but only with medical authorization. On my flight at 7 1/2 months pregnant, they even photocopied my medical note and kept it in their files lol

      • FormerlyKnownAsWendy

        I totally thought about this! Traveling a long time is miserable when you’re not pregnant. Screw this! Can’t fly without a note! Can’t drink! What part of a vacation is this? Wait till the kid’s popped out and leave it with Grandma, then go enjoy yourself and get some much needed sleep.

      • Tinyfaeri

        There’s something about pregnancy and parenting that makes some people want to give completely normal things stupid, “cute” names.

      • Larkin

        THAT I can get behind. I’d like to go on an adult trip or two before the baby shows up, but the term “babymoon” just makes me want to hurl.

      • http://www.ambiencechaser.com/ Elizabeth Licata

        Yeah, it’s mostly the word “babymoon” that bugs me. Take a vacation whenever you want, but don’t make up dumb names for it. (Also on my list: “baby bump” and “push present.”)

      • MamaLlama

        Agreed! I’m a ‘mommy’ but I prefer my actual name and words like ‘pint’ or ‘Pinot’ than any ‘mommy’ -fied reference. Gag me.

    • jsterling93

      I get so sick of this type of complaint. Basically if you don’t ever want to hear about the things other people do that you don’t you have no business on social media. If people are not suppose to post about their trips, their food, their babies, their weddings, complain about anything, or celebrate anything what are they suppose to post?

      I planned my pregnancy carefully so no I wasn’t “strapped for cash” trying to prepare. I had plans for a babymoon. I didn’t get it. Not due to money but because my mother became ill and I spent the last trimester of my pregnancy working with her doctors to save her life. I am happy to say she has fully recovered. But I still am sad I never got that last trip before baby. But I don’t begrudge other people those happy memories.

    • robbie

      As I’ve always said ‘spare me the details of your wonderful life!’

    • TwentiSomething Mom

      I’ve seen a lot of these babymoon pics then the “I lost enough weight to wear a bikini” vacation pics and I’m not going to lie, It does make me feel a tad jealous but I’m happy for those that can do it anyway.

      Plus, who says they can even afford it and they’re not paying with credit or their savings?

    • Zettai

      Maybe I’m dumb but I thought you couldn’t go flying after a certain period of pregnancy, how is someone flying to Jamaica the month before they’re due?

      • Véronique Houde

        You can fly, you just need a permission slip from your doctor to board the plane. I flew all the way to Europe 7 1/2 months pregnant with no complications (it was my BIL’s wedding). They do recommend however that you get those socks that keep your legs compressed so as to avoid blood clots.

      • Zettai

        Ahhh I see.

      • Joy

        You can fly with doctor’s permission, but I’m surprised so many people go to countries (like Jamaica) where the medical care is not up to par. I wanted to go to Jamaica and my doctor said she wouldn’t tell me I can’t go, but that she certainly wouldn’t, because at the point in my pregnancy when I was planning to go, the baby could quite possibly be saved with advanced neonatal care offered in the major city where I live, but if I were to go into early labor in a Jamaican hospital, we were just out of luck. We ended up going to NYC for a few days instead and putting off the beach trip until after Little Man is a year or so old and my parents can watch him for a few days. Now that I’m closing in on 7 months preggo, I have less than no interest in being in a bikini in public anyway, so it worked out I guess.

      • AP

        It depends on your health insurance, too. I had a health insurance policy a few years back (Harvard Pilgrim of Massachusetts) that had a stipulation that pregnant women who traveled outside of their care provider range in the 5th month or later would not be covered for out-of-network medical care related to the pregnancy.

        So if you went away to New York or even Maine for the weekend and went into labor, the bills were all on you. “Sorry I can’t be at your deathbed, Granny, but I’m 5 months pregnant and my health insurance won’t let me leave the state.”

      • Zettai

        WOW. Messed up!

      • MLSKC

        It depends on the airline. With #1, hubs & I had to make an emergency flight home when his grandfather passed away. We found out on a Friday evening and took the first flight out on Southwest the next morning. I was 28 weeks and was pretty large but I wasn’t even asked if I was pregnant. With #2 we were planning an all family trip to Eleuthra, Bahamas for when I would be 32 weeks. American said I wouldn’t need a note since it was more than 4 weeks before my due date. I didn’t get to go however, so I don’t know how AA would have handled it.

    • Véronique Houde

      Yeah… I went on vacations when I was pregnant last too. And they were called… vacations! I hate the term “babymoon” ugh.

    • Ro

      Yes, don’t talk about anything nice on Facebook because people will think you are bragging.

      • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

        I laundry brag all the time :(

    • Natasha B

      Meh, hide their feed if you’ve got jealousy issues. We post vacay pics all the time, mostly cool scenery. If someone has the means and desire to travel, good for them. They shouldn’t not post it cuz it might make someone jealous.
      It does irritate me when people hashtag on FB though…I mean, dumb.

    • guest

      We ended up going on a trip when I was pregnant, but it was a planned weekend away for our anniversary and I just happened to be pregnant at the time. Can you say least fun trip ever? No drinking, no energy to do anything fun, and no libido so sexy time was off the table. Babymoons are stupid, to me. I’d much rather have a trip without the baby after they are born, because then you’ve really had a chance to know what you miss about your old life. Now, everytime we get a sitter for the evening, a trip to Red Lobster legit feels like a week at a beach side resort. If you ask nicely they’ll even put one of those little umbrellas in your drink.

    • wonderstruck

      How is this any different from people going on vacation any other time? My husband and I went to Myrtle Beach when I was pregnant. I never called it a babymoon, but yeah, I wanted a vacation before baby came, so we found someplace pretty inexpensive, saved and budgeted, and went. I guess not hiding it and daring to post two pictures on facebook makes me a bad friend?

    • Shannon

      Listen broke parents, I’m sorry there’s always going to be someone that can afford more than you, but that’s how life is. I’m not a braggy person by nature, but what really peeves me is when people will say something like,”well with all those trips/extravagant purchases, they would have an awesome college fund for the baby” as if to imply that education MUST not be valuable to them because they took a vacation or bought a petunia pickle bottom diaper bag. How goddamn judgy is THAT? 25% of my husbands check goes into our 401k. We have a sizeable savings account. My daughters college fund has been established since birth and gets contributions monthly as well. So I go and buy a $150 diaper bag or go on a nice vacation and I’m looked down upon as braggy and frivolous or irresponsible? We have no credit card debt and generally save up for large purchases. My husband works his ass off, and yeah, we get by ok, but I think it’s something to be really proud of.

      It’s just the humblemartyrs that really get to me. “Well, I would neeeever buy a Kate spade purse. My walmart purse is fine. They should think about their children’s education before buying something that extravagant for themselves.” I’m happy for you that you like your cheaper purse, that’s totally fine. But why vilify someone that decides to spend THEIR MONEY differently from how you would spend yours. Talk about judgmental

      • Bethany Ramos

        Humblemartyrs — I love that. For me it is not the money spending because I love to spend money on myself and my family and also work my ass off. My only particular irk was with the term “babymoon,” as if the act of pregnancy needs one more official celebration. This was also coupled with the #bragging that I saw on social media.

      • Shannon

        I sorta edited my comment to apologize because I came off bitchy toward you and I’m sorry! I didn’t mean it that way.

        I totally admit to being annoyed at some pregnancy stuff too. My cousin had 3 baby girls in less than 3 years and had 3 baby showers where she registered for all new stuff every time and I was like,”Jesus dude, how many ruffle onesies and pink baby bathtubs do ya need??”

      • Bethany Ramos

        Haha not a problem at all. :) You’ve got valid points too!

    • http://www.twitter.com/ohladyjayne allisonjayne

      I’m with the others who said it’s really only the name that bugs me. Like, just because you’re pregnant it can’t be a regular vacation??? We went on vacation when I was pregnant and I went to Beirut for work when I was pregnant as well. I didn’t call these anything but “work trip” and “vacation” just because I happened to be pregnant. I may have also referred to the work trip as “great way to piss both my parents off by going to the middle east while gestating their grandchild” but nonetheless.

      I’m for sure jealous when I see my friends post about their fancy houses and trips to Bali but I like that line about if you’re jealous of one thing, you have to be jealous of everything. Maybe they can afford these things because they work crazy hours in the corporate world (sooo not my bag). Or they have a lot of help from their rich parents who worked crazy hours or give them guilt trips about stuff or whatever. Or they make a lot of sacrifices in other areas to be able to afford those things. We all have different priorities.

    • SA

      Do not understand. Aren’t you supposed to take this vacation BEFORE you get pregnant. That is what sensible people do. Rage your ass off somewhere tropical whilst you can still drink and before you have all the mom anxiety and guilt that is always nagging away in the back of your head no matter how much fun you are having. Man, I crammed so much fun into the year before we started trying that I gained 10lbs! Pregnant? Give me ice cream, A/C, and my own bed! Body pillows don’t fly well.

      • Bethany Ramos

        I could not agree more. The only thing I did while traveling when I was pregnant was sightseeing and other boring stuff – and then feel sad that I couldn’t get super drunk in a new city. :(

      • SA

        I only made it to an out of town concert. Taking a 2 am cab back to the hotel SOBER was not my idea of a ‘babymoon’! :)

    • Momma425

      Maybe it’s just because I hated being pregnant, but the only babymoon I would want to go on is a week long staycation where I can nap in my bed all day.
      Going to some tropical place while I’m bloated and pregnant and huge sounds…hot, sweaty, and uncomfortable. Additionally, I wasn’t in the mood AT all when I was pregnant- I know my husband would be severely disappointed to shell out thousands for a luxury babymoon and be forced out of the bed and onto an unfamiliar sofa. Additionally, I wouldn’t have fun on a vacation where I couldn’t ride a roller coaster, couldn’t get drunk, couldnt go to the hotel pool and relax in the hot tub… Essentially, I would get to sit on the beach, drink water, and vomit those giant horse-pill prenatals in a hotel bathroom instead of my own. Not something I would be into personally- I would rather go on a vacation before/after pregnancy than spend my hard-earned money on a trip that I won’t enjoy and won’t have fun on because I had to spend the whole time pregnant.

      But for those who do it- awesome! Have fun! No judgment of jealousy here. To each their own, and as always- if looking at other people’s pictures makes you jealous/feel badly about your own situation, you can always just choose not to look. Simple as that.

    • blh

      If you can’t ahndle seeing people’s pictures of vacations or anything else, you’rethe problem, not them. You should probably not have a facebook since that’s kind of the point of it.

    • AmazingE

      When stuff like this comes through my news feed, I just have to scroll on by, because if I don’t I find myself with all these feelings, and none of them are pleasant. We’re currently expecting our second kid, and like most other people we know, we’re broke as hell. Neither of us has ever been on a vacation that wasn’t a family function of some sort, and it really chaps my ass when I see pictures of people taking vacations and buying pricey stuff, and then two status updates later that person is complaining about how broke they are. If you saved for that stuff and you work hard for it, then good on you, I’m happy for you and will be delighted to look at your pictures. The sad reality (at least for me) is that most of the people I know are generally shitty people who leech off the system and cry poverty for most of the year, but when tax time comes they do stupid shit like buy giant tv’s and ps4′s instead of say, buying their kids New shoes or decent winter coats, or something else equally useful.

      I realize this comes off as kind of ranty, which wasn’t my intention at all. I just know a lot of shitty people, and it’s been kind of a hot button for me lately.

    • adlandry

      I am against most things that pregnant women do to bring MORE attention to the fact that they are pregant. I am however, lucky enough to be one of these pregnant people who is going on a vacation next week, and i plan to ironically hashtag the hell out of that thing. But as for this article, is bragging about your honeymoon any more annoying to single people (who don’t have the double income or family gifts to afford such lavish trips) – or anyone to take a trip with at all for that matter?

    • Edify

      See, I just thought we took a holiday.

    • Jan

      We’re going on a baby moon- it’s just easier to say than #goingawayfor2weeksonourownbeforetheshitliterallyhitsthefan

      I have a workmate who makes mean little comments like you- like “most parents I know are broke” or “guess your baby will sleep in a cardboard box after this!” Followed by a tinkle of fake laughter.

      Whatever- you’re right. I’m very lucky that we are in a position to do this – but just as I am envious of my super rich friends with their monthly Chanel purchases- I think wanting to throttle someone because their circumstances are better than yours is a tad overdoing it!

      • notorious

        Couldn’t you just say that you were going away. Period. “We are going on a vacation.” Why do you have to qualify it as a babymoon or relate it to your baby in any way? He or she is not even here.

      • Jan

        Because… it wasn’t just a vacation. It was a holiday we specifically took so we could remember it as “The Holiday We Took Before The Kids Came”- just as you would call it a honeymoon because you specifically look back and think “The Holiday We Took After We Got Married”.
        Some of my friends couldn’t afford honeymoons- should we stop putting on facebook when we take honeymoons?

      • meghancnyc

        “I have a workmate who makes mean little comments like you- like “most parents I know are broke” or “guess your baby will sleep in a cardboard box after this!” Followed by a tinkle of fake laughter.” That’s basically this entire article.

    • Justme

      I am all for treating people with kindness and dignity, but I don’t believe in censoring the joys of my life because I might inadvertently hurt someone else’s feelings. If my vacation plans, housing situation, clothing choices or anything else I do in my life is making you feel bad…that is on you.

      For example, a college friend of mine dresses her daughters immaculately – always in unique, beautiful, custom clothes with gorgeous matching bows. It’s hard not to feel like a girl mom failure when seeing pictures of her girls. But she doesn’t post the pics to rub it in other people’s faces – she’s just sharing her life like we all do on FB. If I feel like a bad mom when looking at her girls, it’s because it’s MY hang-up.

      Like anything in this world, people who openly brag or gloat are obnoxious and annoying – because that isn’t a great characteristic about a person, but not because it might make someone feel bad about themselves.

    • koolchicken

      You know I don’t like this post, it seems whiny and slightly jealous. Are you sure you could afford those trips?

      I feel like my life is my life, and your life is your life. I shouldn’t have to hide what I’m doing because it “might” make someone else feel bad. If that family that’s so strapped for cash saves up to go on vacation can I say “I spared you my vacation pics, please do the same for me”? Cause that doesn’t seem right. Also if you’re so strapped for cash why are you having a baby? It’s 2014, we discovered the cause of pregnancy and babies are now preventable. When I was younger I used BC because I wasn’t ready to have a baby. When I was older, finically stable, and married with a home I got pregnant. So I’m sorry if posting photos of the life I waited a long time for is causing you angst. But perhaps the problem isn’t me, it’s the people who are so hung up on what others are doing they can’t work to create a better life for themselves.

      For the record I did have a baby moon. I lived somewhere tropical (a.k.a. crazy hot) so I went on a cruise to Alaska. I was the only woman in a sundress eating ice cream but I was finally comfortable, for two blissful weeks. My husband got a job on that cruise ship so I got to go with him. We work for the life we have and if I want to post photos you better believe I’m going to.

      • nancy

        Ya pretentious ppl always believe their easy lives just conveniently fell into place…

    • MamaLlama

      I just hate hashtags. Mostly just the sanctimonious/braggart ones. Just keep hating on the hashtags and I’ll continue to support your articles. #hashtagh8r.

      • Bethany Ramos

        I am always down with the #hashtaghate

      • MamaLlama

        Aww. You replied so fast. #blessedbybethany’

      • Bethany Ramos

        Lolllll

    • Gangle

      I have just had a ‘baby moon’. And I feel that my husband and I damned well deserved it. After the stressful and invasive IVF treatments, which left me sick, emotional and landed me in emergency with OHSS and a horrible first trimester sprinkled with scares, I darn well needed a room with a view, a swimming pool and a beach for two weeks. I really wish all pregnant ladies could have a ‘babymoon’, or at least time away somewhere.

      • MerlePerle

        Well congratulations then! You deserved the babymoon! Hope the rest of your pregnancy goes better!

      • Gangle

        aw shucks, thanks!

    • LawGeekNYC

      I can afford the babymoon, I just can’t afford the actual kid.

    • meghancnyc

      You’re really going to begrudge friends from taking a vacation before they have a child? Just because you can’t or choose not to spend your money in that fashion? Who the cares what you think? I personally hate the term “babymoon” but fuck you for trying to make people feel bad for getting away for a few days to relax and recharge before a huge life change.

      • Bethany Ramos

        Wow, I made it clear I was talking about the term babymoon, even more so in my comments below. I am begrudging no one but the extreme braggers. Respectfully, you missed the point.

      • meghancnyc

        “Every time I see the #babymoon phenomenon clogging up my newsfeed, all I can think of is how much a broke parent struggling to work full time and still pay for daycare would want to throttle the glowing pregnant lady sipping orange juice on the beach.” Yeah, you’re not talking about “extreme braggers” you’re talking about anyone who has the nerve to get away and post about it in your FB feed. I think parents, moms especially, are judged enough without being made to feel bad about taking a trip with their partner before the arrival of a new baby and then having the nerve to post pictures or updates to their FB friends. Respectfully, you’re backpedaling.

      • Bethany Ramos

        IDK, the quote you pulled still makes perfect sense to me. Thanks for your input, not sarcastically at all. #respectfuldisagreement

      • meghancnyc

        I think we can both agree that, “My hubby and I on our #babymoon! Check out my bump!” is the worst thing that could ever be written.

      • Bethany Ramos

        We agree! (Right? You weren’t being sarcastic? lol)

      • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

        I’m gonna begrudge everyone everything, it’s kinda my jam. and hey, fuck you seriously? to a writer? because you disagree with her? I begrudge you this fuck you usage

      • nancy

        Wow….fuck you for really missing the point and being mean for no reason…

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    • LoopdiLoo

      I think what bothers people about “babymoons” (at least what bothers me) isn’t that they can’t afford one themselves…its just that a “babymoon” is yet another way for egotistical narcissists to feel good about themselves for doing something that most of the world population can do…that being to procreate.

      Its getting a little ridiculous these days…what with “grandma showers” and “gender reveal parties”. Its all just an excuse for people to put the spotlight on themselves.
      On a very real note – we all understand that you are happy about having a child, and that’s great and well-deserved…but no one else cares as much as you do – get over yourselves.