The Next Person Who Tells Me My Child Looks ‘Too Big For A Stroller’ Is Going To Get Throat-Punched

152407936My child just turned three years old. He’s already over three-and-a-half feet tall and wears a size 12 shoe. He’s always been tall for his age, and it’s always presented some interesting situations. The current one I am dealing with has to do with his stroller, and how much it seems to offend people that I occasionally use it.

Like I said, he’s always been tall for his age. When he was about a year and a half, what looked to be a four-year-old child walked up to him and said, You want to play with me? My son wasn’t really talking at that point so he just looked at him and smiled. The kid goes, Ew! You’re drooling all over yourself! And runs away. I hate to laugh at the expense of my kid and all, but it was pretty hilarious.

When you have a tall kid, people just assume he is older – because he really looks it. He’s the same height if not taller than all the kids in his playgroup that are at least a year older than him. I’m five-foot-three, but he has the long legs of his father and grandfather. He’s gorgeous:

IMG_3255__1390942728_142.196.156.251

(photo: Maria Guido)

Now, certainly these legs are long and strong enough to take him wherever he needs to go – but he’s still three. Anyone with a spirited young child knows there are times when you just can not get him to walk. If I take him the seven blocks to the park without the stroller in tow, I may end up carrying him five blocks home if he’s not in the right mood.

Also, I have an infant. If she’s along for the ride, there is no way I can leave the house without the stroller. Imagine having a baby strapped to your chest and a toddler who’s more than half your height who refuses to walk. It’s not pretty.

I’m explaining all of this so that you can understand the wrath I felt when the other day a man who saw me pushing him the street said, He should be pushing YOU! Look how big he is! Kids need to walk! I fake smiled and kept it moving because since I moved to Florida I no longer mouth off to people in the street. Everyone is armed here.

But if I wasn’t afraid of being shot by a random stranger, I would have said this:

Oh, kids need to walk? Really? I didn’t know that! I was planning on keeping him in this thing until he went to college. Thanks for stopping me in the street to give me advice – you fucking dip-shit.

Here’s the thing: I really don’t need to explain why I’m pushing my kid in a stroller to anyone, but I did it here to gently point out that strangers on the street have no idea what someone’s situation is or why they make the choices they do. Silently judging is one thing – it’s what I used to do before I had kids and why I’m convinced I now have my karma child – but actually confronting someone about benign parenting choices that don’t affect you whatsoever? That’s just ridiculous.

(photo: Getty Images)

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    • Kay_Sue

      Our tall three year olds would have fun together. Maybe yours could convince mine that it’s still okay to use the stroller occasionally.. *sighs*

    • CMJ

      The headlines today are killing me. And when I say “killing me” I mean I love them.

    • Tiffany

      My son is 3.5, and he and my 2 year old daughter take turns in the dinky stroller we have when we go somewhere like the zoo, etc. He looks like he’s about 5, and I’ve gotten comments before as well. Unless those people want to carry his heavy ass around when his “legs are tired,” they need to leave me alone. In other news, your son is beautiful, and I want to squeeze him. But I won’t.

    • rrlo

      Parents are the new smokers… everyone feels comfortable telling them what to do. Why do people a) notice, b) care and c) care enough to make an awkward comment? People are weird.

    • Megan Zander

      Ok so first, that child is gorgeous, like gap kids model gorgeous.
      Second, I can’t believe someone would actually say that out loud and in person to a stranger. I mean hey, I judge the crap out of parents when I go to disney and see girls that look old enough to have training bras and boys that should be shaving crammed into strollers, but i would never say anything. There’s no way for a stranger to know if it’s sheer laziness or if the kid is tall for thier age, or has a disability that makes it hard to walk or something. I vote you get some pepper spray. So you can retort when necessary but stay safe.

    • G.E. Phillips

      Your son is freaking ADORABLE.

      • Maria Guido

        Thanks!

      • http://www.gamedevwidow.weebly.com/ Theresa Edwards

        My kid’s a shortie too. I get “what’s wrong with her?” a lot. I like to reply with a smile and a “well, she’s not fucking deaf, for one thing”. People love that out here in the burbs.

      • G.E. Phillips

        “What’s wrong with her?” Are you fucking kidding me? Who says that to someone about their child??? Your answer is perfect, though.

      • http://www.gamedevwidow.weebly.com/ Theresa Edwards

        It’s actually usually part of a “wow she’s so cute how old is she?” when they hear it’s a full 2 or 3 years older than they expect, I believe it’s kneejerk. Even so, I will take any excuse to say the word fuck because it is my favorite of all the words.

      • gothicgaelicgirl

        LOL people’s “OH SHIT I MESSED UP” reactions are great.
        One woman waxed lyrical about how my girls were the spitting image of me, how she could see they’d look even more like me as they get older…til the little one piped up- “She’s our step-mammy”

        Woman turned an attractive shade of red and scooted. haha

      • JLH1986

        While not going into quite the depth this woman did, I have remarked on the resemblance a child had to the woman holding her hand. I assumed (we know what that’s gets us, right? No? Let me explain). This could looked like she was shot out of this lady’s ass. The woman very nicely said “She’s my step daughter-but thanks!” My response: “No shit? Well hell she can pass for yours any day of the week!”. I got no shame. I laughed she laughed and we moved on. oops!

      • gothicgaelicgirl

        at least you managed to turn it into a funny situation.
        I got the whole “SHAME! STEP PARENT! SHAME! NOT BIO! SHAAAAMMMEEE!!!!” vibe off her lol

      • JLH1986

        oh well screw her. Step Parent by it’s definition is a parent so…yea. I try not to make assumptions (because I look like an asshole) but in this instance I felt safe, because seriously this could looked like her, methinks pops has a “type”. But you know whatever, live and learn and move on. Now I just comment on how pretty/cute etc. and lot them infer what they like.

      • gothicgaelicgirl

        I…kinda want to hug you now for the step parent definition. =)

      • JLH1986

        Long Distance Hugs! :) I’ve never understood the hoopla. I have the equivalent of a step parent and he’s amazing to my mom (and me!) My grandfather is my mom’s “step parent” though I’ve never heard either of them say that and in fact I was 10 and doing a family tree before I even knew he wasn’t my blood grandfather. My husband’s step dad is amazing. I know not ALL step parent relationships are like that…but hello it says “parent” in the damn title. It’s not rocket science.

      • gothicgaelicgirl

        Now I not only want to give you a hug i want to buy you several muffins. =)
        I get it though, I have a wonderful stepmom who I sometimes spoke to more than my mother!

      • JLH1986

        Muffins? Wanna be besties? :)

      • gothicgaelicgirl

        TOTES!!! *Said in Japanese school-girl fashion* lol

      • biggerthanthesound

        My youngest is really small, like my 18 month old nephew is the same size as her. She is 3, and sometmes at the park people would make comments to their own kids like “Watch out for that BABY” and shoot me a look. One time, a lady ran up behind her when she was going up a ladder to the slide like she was going to fall! I usually just tell them how old she is and that she is pretty coordinated.

      • rrlo

        Everyone knows how to raise your child better than you… (sarcasm)

      • EX

        I also have a very coordinated peanut. When combined with my efforts to let her work things out on her own, I get some pretty nasty looks at the park for the things I allow her to do.

    • Emily Wight

      I’m basically crying right now from jealousy because my 2-year-old is similarly tall and WILL NOT abide a stroller ride, under any circumstances. So much screaming. So much heavy to lug home…

      • Kay_Sue

        My three year old’s the same. Too independent for his own good, I guess.

      • Maria Guido

        Yes – that would be horrible. After about 30 seconds of struggle I can usually distract him with an acorn or something and strap him in.

      • Kay_Sue

        I’m totally finding an acorn the next time personally, lol.

      • Emily Wight

        I guess I’m doing something wrong because mine’s keenest sense is his sense of injustice and he can deflect a diversion tactic more stealthily than I can deliver one. So we lug him around like a 35-pound sac of writhing mutant potatoes.

      • Ana

        LOLing at the writhing mutant potatoes description. My 19 m.o. is the same about strollers, but she doesn’t want to be carried either, she wants to walk everywhere on her own. Unfortunately she has no concept of danger yet and will run right through a parking lot or across a street if I let her. When I grab her hand she throws herself on the icy ground and screams. If I pick her up I get the writing potatoes. Ugh. Can’t wait for this stage to be over.

      • Katherine Handcock

        I feel you on this! Neither of my kids were that tall, but neither would put up with strollers for long. I’m very, VERY lucky that we have a second vehicle, because honestly, if I had to walk everywhere with the kids, it would seriously limit what we could do.

    • aCongaLine

      I have a tall and lanky kiddo too- when people point that out, I say “Tall and skinny. Such problems in life already” and there is laughter. THe moment someone tells me my kid is too big for the stroller, I too will think about punching them.

      Dude. I need this thing like I need air to breathe, and coffee to think. I will literally lose somebody if I don’t have them strapped in.

      #ILoveMyDoubleStroller

      ETA: your kid is the cutest kid I’ve ever seen. Absolutely adorbs.

      • gothicgaelicgirl

        LOVE THIS!
        I’m so robbing your “Tall and skinny” pearl of wisdom next time a staff member in H and M SIGHS and tells my girl- “YOU’RE TOO TALL.”
        DON’T tell the kid that, you’ll give her a complex!
        I just say you’re taller than most BUT (ENTHUSIASTIC MOMMY!!! SHITTING GLITTER AND RAINBOWS) that means you get to wear some of the cool older rock chick stuff.
        cheers her right up. =)

      • aCongaLine

        LOL. I’m happy to share! I always say it dripping with sarcasm, because, like, I was (am) the short fat girl in school (life). I’ve gotten really good at extending the length of her pants, and cinching in her waists :)

        body shaming a kid? that’s awful. Girls have enough to worry about with puberty and boys and grades and hormones and zits and growing up. OyVey. :)

      • gothicgaelicgirl

        KUDOS FOR OYVEY!!!
        lol.
        yeah one girl in particular is awful for it, my girls have an unusual style, in the sense the older might wear combat jeans with a skater dress and Converse.
        this one woman always raises an eyebrow in a certain way.

        I think the eyebrow is judging my parenting…

      • aCongaLine

        We need these, but in toddler and big kid sizes, lol.

      • gothicgaelicgirl

        LOVE THIS!!!
        But see, then I’d get the “o, you’re not her mother, you’re her STEPMOTHER”
        (AKA- Not a real parent) =P

      • aCongaLine

        There really is no winning for anyone- booo. Let’s just make shirts that say “Shut The Fuck Up, You Hag!” and show them when appropriate :)

      • gothicgaelicgirl

        I love you forever for that shirt idea lol.
        The kids call me WSM (Wicked step mother) lol i love it.

      • JLH1986

        You make this happen. I will buy 40…so I can distribute.

      • Maria Guido

        Why didn’t anyone get me this???

      • aCongaLine

        found it on etsy. Ordered it for my college roommate, who is preggos. :)

      • Maria Guido

        Also- you’ve just given me and idea for a post, so thanks. :)

      • aCongaLine

        This *literally* made my day. :)

    • Bethany Ramos

      He’s so beautiful!! I have the opposite problem – my kid is a tiny little Mexican, and people are always like, awwww, how is he walking? He’s 2… :)

    • pixie

      I agree with everyone else, your kid is super cute. And has fantastic hair.
      I don’t remember when I stopped using a stroller, I was pretty young, and that was because my parents didn’t feel like buying a new one when it broke. I was also pretty good at walking for a long time and if I did get tired my dad would put me on his shoulders (where I would usually fall asleep). I was a small kid, though, and not very heavy.
      That being said, I try not to judge when I see parents with tall kids in strollers because I know kids vary a lot in height and a younger kid can look a couple years older and vice-versa. Plus I have no idea if the child has a disability.

    • gothicgaelicgirl

      BEAUTIFUL little lad!
      The eldest stepdaughter is 10 but at times can look around 13/14. She’s already 5 foot tall, just 4 inches shorter than me!
      sadly she gets unwanted MALE attention.
      Seriously, walking downtown with her, she’ll have teenage guys winking at her and one even asked for her number. she doesn’t understand it and i have to POLITELY explain to these young guys that actually, she’s ten. she’s not a teen, she’s still not even a TWEEN!
      god love ‘em, poor lads are always morto!

    • TwentiSomething Mom

      A couple of things: Your son is absolutely adorable and has the same hair as mine.

      And secondly, I still push my two (almost three) year old in the stroller because I don’t have a car and walk everywhere. Like close to a mile each way to daycare everyday and the handle bars on the stroller make it so useful to carry groceries. I can carry a lot more pushing his stroller than if I were to walk plus I can go longer distances.

      So yea, I hate it when HE gets the “you should be walking” comments from strangers as if its totally his decision whether he goes in the stroller or not.

      • gothicgaelicgirl

        see, I’m a bad parent- If someone told me “Your child should be walking” I’d say- “SHIT! I KNEW I forgot the dog-lead!”

      • JLH1986

        Psssshhhhhh. I’d call that “Fucking Awesome Parenting” And would crack up laughing if I heard this on the street.

      • gothicgaelicgirl

        And your comment has now brightened my day.
        I no longer feel like an evil parent. =P

      • http://www.twitter.com/ohladyjayne allisonjayne

        Another parent here who doesn’t have a car. And an almost 3 year old who still naps during the day and naps BETTER in her stroller than at home, so often we just go out for the whole day, running errands and going to parks or whatever it is we do on weekends.

        About 6 months ago, when my kid had just turned 2, some nosy old biddy on the subway started talking loudly to the person beside her about how “kids these days need to walk blahblah lazy” or something. I went right up beside her and started talking loudly to my kid about how she’s only 2 years old and isn’t it great we have a stroller because she still naps during the day and we were just returning home from such a long fun day at the science centre. Then I gave the woman death glares until she got uncomfortable and moved away from me.

        Yes, I totally admit that I resort to using my kid to passive-aggressively deal with assholes on public transit. “I know you’d love a seat on the subway [kid] but that person’s knapsack obviously paid for a ticket and deserves its own seat instead”.

      • Lilly

        See I am even worse, I will put my child on the seat next to the annoying person (even on top of the backpack) so that they really experience my passive aggression though the fidgety flurry of a 2 year old.

        Although since Toronto is not at all accessible friendly, I have found that dropping the stroller in the winter is actually easier.

      • http://www.twitter.com/ohladyjayne allisonjayne

        Toronto here too. I only use the stroller on days when we’ll be out during her nap time. I make her get out and walk down the stairs while I carry the stroller. If she’s napping and I have to carry her down the stairs…well I do a mental note to make sure I have back pain meds at home. :(

    • Aimee Beff

      Parenting in Public: However You’re Doing It, You’re Doing It Wrong.

      Your son is one cute cutey cute cute!

      • Kay_Sue

        Amen!

      • TwentiSomething Mom

        So true, I’m sure if he were walking someone would comment his tired little legs must be tired.

      • http://www.gamedevwidow.weebly.com/ Theresa Edwards

        And where’s his hat?!? Something something arglebargle too cold too hot.

      • Maria Guido

        I’m stealing that.

    • Alexandra

      “I fake smiled and kept moving because since I moved to Florida I no longer mouth off to people in the street. Everyone is armed here.”
      Sorry I know this is a SUPER touchy subject for everyone, and I feel terrible that I LOLd to this because it’s far too true. Interesting I feel safer in NYC at 3am on a random side street than I do on a highway in Florida. As I always say of that state – they’re all drunk, and driving, and most of them have guns.
      (My mom lives there, hence my familiarity).

    • chickadee

      My eldest didn’t really grow hair past the nape of her neck until she was 18 months old, so she always got mistaken for a boy. Because I put her in sort of gender-neutral clothes (all of the *good* Sesame Street clothes were boy-clothes) everyone thought she was a boy. And I got lectures from strangers who felt that I should be putting pink things on her so that people wouldn’t think she was a boy. Like I cared what they thought. Like I cared that they felt foolish for thinking she was a boy.

      • LadyClodia

        When he was a baby I dressed my boy in boy clothes, and everyone would always comment on how pretty “she” was. Apparently they assumed he was a she because he has amazingly long eyelashes. Now that he’s a toddler people still make weird comments about his eyelashes, like “oh it’s a shame for a boy to have such pretty eyelashes.” Why?

      • chickadee

        Because EYELASHES are a GIRL thing, I guess. Like curly hair, since everyone said that same thing about my nephew’s curls…

      • Vee

        All three of my boys have eyelashes that even MAC’s $5BAJILLION WEIRD-FIBROUS-POLYESTER-UNICORN-TEARS mascara cannot replicate on my face.

        They get them from their father, who says they have always been a pain, because “they bat against my sunglasses.” OH MY GOD, BOO HOO HOO, YOU BLOODY TORTURED ADONIS.

        … and the middle one, when left ungroomed, cultivates curls normally seen on Shirley Temple, or possibly a Victoria’s Secret model.

        It is sad, and disgusting, and despicable… but only because MAC took so much of my money before I realized we were all just trying to copy the boys’ face-fur.

        What are eyelashes for, again, anyway? Keeping bugs and low-flying albatross out of our eyes? I get so uppity when people start going on about the kids’ eyelashes. Like… compliment/comment on something that isn’t an annoying genetic gift, please? Or at least tell me they have supremely precious kneecaps or something… something new.

        F them gd eyelashes.

      • staferny

        My brother got the blond curly locks and eyelashes worthy of suffleupagus, they were so long that they would flip down onto his eye and get stuck under his eyelid. There were a couple times my mom had to pin him down and pull his lashes back to the right location :(

      • SusannahJoy

        I have long eyelashes. The glasses thing actually is pretty annoying, because I’m totally blind, so I have to make sure any new glasses fit well, and I can’t wear mascara cuz it gets all over my eyelids. Although you know, I don’t really need mascara, so it’s ok.

      • Blooming_Babies

        Boys get excellent eyelashes just like boy birds get the pretty feathers, to attract the females. Before society screwed it up men also wore the panty hoes, high heels and wigs. (Some awesome men still do) :)

      • pixie

        People thought I was a boy because I spent more time with my dad. Seriously.

      • chickadee

        *facepalm*

      • Iwill Findu

        I’ve had people call my daughter a boy well she was wearing pink, so it really makes no difference.

    • Kelly

      I feel your pain. I had a large child. I remember people yelling at me to put him down and make him walk when he was 6 months old. People are douchebags.

      • Katherine Handcock

        I would totally have just stared at them and said, “He can’t.” Like stared them right in the eye. It would have been fun to see how many of them I could make scuttle off like terrified hermit crabs.

      • Maria Guido

        Isn’t that crazy? When Lucien was just over a year, I had him in a stroller in barnes and noble. We were waiting for the bathroom and a mom and her daughter came out of the stall. She says to her daughter, “look honey – a TODDLER with a pacifier!” I wanted to kick her in the face.

    • LadyClodia

      Your son is seriously such a cutie!
      At about 1 1/2 to 2 both of mine decided that strollers were out. For our older son it was around 2, and then he refused for about a year and then realized that walking is hard. When our second son was born we made sure to get a stroller that would work for the baby, but that also has a little bench seat in the back for our older son. Our younger son refused the stroller at about 18 months. We bought a backpack carrier that my husband used with him when we traveled because that was our only option. It is hard for me to take both of them anywhere by myself since I can’t contain the toddler. I wish we could still use the stroller sometimes.
      Plus, people just need to mind their own business. I don’t understand how someone thinks it’s OK to say something to someone to their face. Just whisper about them behind their backs once they walk away; like normal people.

    • LiteBrite

      Btw, your son is ADORABLE. That kid is gonna break some hearts some day if he isn’t doing it already. :)

    • LiteBrite

      Here’s what you can say to that guy:

    • kay

      I request all your posts now have a picture of your kid. Adorable!

    • Jallun-Keatres

      Since I am (by choice) engrained with the perspective of a special needs mom I never judge kids in strollers because they could legit have a hidden disability like Mito and need to rest/be just a little unsteady/have immense pain.

      BTW your kid is sooo cute and I would have totally thought he was at least 5. It’s the gorgeous locks. :3

    • Jennifer Miller

      Oh, Maria. THANK YOU. My son is 3 1/2 and wears a size 11 shoe, probably just became a 12 as I write this. We, too, live a few blocks from the park and there is no way my lovely 48-year-old husband is going to carry an exhausted kid home. We live within walking distance to most things we need, so on good days, we walk. With a stroller. Fortunately for us, this is rural NC, where the judgments manifest in side-eyes and the occasional “bless your heart.” Easy to ignore. But so glad I’m not alone with my little Sasquatch!

    • Rachel Sea

      Your son is gorgeous, and I LOVE the expression he’s making in that shot.

      I judge the heck out of people with really big kids in strollers…but those kids are, like, 8 and 9 years old, with backpacks, and gym bags, and stuff (there are a couple people who shop at the posh grocery store across the street from my office who push their clearly neurotypical, able bodied elementary school kids in strollers that they have outgrown to the point that they can’t even sit in them properly).

      One of my “nephews” is like your son. He was as tall as the average 4 year old when he was 2. People who didn’t know him assumed he was mentally challenged because he didn’t act the age they perceived him to be. Now he’s 7, and as tall as the average 10 year old and everyone wants to know whether he plays basketball. I tell them, “Only if Basketball is the name of a new role playing game.”

    • missiemeghan

      That little man of yours is stinking adorable.

    • Abby

      First off, totally agreed with everyone, your son’s gorgeous!

      Just wanted to offer my sympathies — my kid has measured 90-97th percentile for height and weight since she was 4 months old, and is now 38 inches tall, 34 pounds at 2 1/2 years old. We always joke that people must think she’s a really slow 3 or 4 year old, but I could never fathom anyone actually saying something to our faces about it!

      The other infuriating size-related thing that we get a lot (which *might* be a girl thing?) is that whenever I mention her extremely healthy appetite, or how heavy she’s getting (true story: I started working out a year ago for the sole reason that I wanted to be able to pick her up without straining), people INEVITABLY say to me “well, she’s TALL, that’s why! Don’t worry, she’s not heavy or fat!” Did… I say I was worried? And c’mon, can a 2-year-old really be considered fat anyway? It’s incredible to think about how early people inculcate kids with all of these things that they feel like they should be ashamed of, when for the most part, they’re all just displaying the wide variation of sizes that kids/humans come in!

    • Katherine Handcock

      The only time I’ve ever resorted to even silent judgement is when it looks like the kid is DYING to get out of the stroller – I saw one poor kid at a children’s museum strapped into the stroller, looking DESPERATE to get out and touch the exhibits (which were, in fact, meant to be handled by kids). I’m even a bit hesitant to judge for kids who are old enough to be reading/playing a handheld video game, because there are so many reasons some kids need the stroller.

      I cannot imagine saying anything to a mom I didn’t know REALLY well.

      • FormerlyKnownAsWendy

        Well, in the case of my own kid, meaning you can “touch” the exhibit would means I would blink and find him on top of one. He’s lightening quick and once he sees other kids touching, that means no rules, right?! So I would probably put him in the stroller (maybe not strapped), because he seems to respect the rules better from a seated position. Don’t know why. But true.

    • spunkysmum

      I’d say, “you know, you look way too old to be so immature and ill-mannered.”

    • moo

      Amen! I have the exact same problem. A three year old who barely fits in size four clothes. I get sick of having to tell people he’s only just turned three. My local supermarket changed the trolleys when he was two and he couldn’t fit in the front anymore. That was frustrating!

    • Tisa Berry

      A good friend of mine used a stroller for her child until he was four (almost five). He has Cerebral Palsy and it was ten times easier to take his stroller to the park, rather than lug out his heavy wheelchair and put it together (it only fits in her car, if she pops a wheel off.) And so many people told her he was too big for a stroller. And when she mentioned she had trouble walking around they would look at the stroller and raise their eyebrows instead of waiting for her to explain. He’s nine now and while he can now use a walker, she still uses a stroller for long trips, because continuing to buy a wheelchair when he can walk very well is too much money.

    • http://wtfihaveakid.blogspot.ca/ jendra_berri

      My goodness you have a beautiful child! And he certainly does look older than 3.

    • Obladi Oblada

      I feel your pain.
      My eldest girl child is 14 and is 6 feet tall.
      My eldest boy child is 11 and is 5′ 7″.
      My younger girl child is 9 and is barely 4 feet and 60 pounds.
      My younger boy child is 7 and is still under 4 feet and weights 45 pounds.
      The younger kids are small for their age. They are both adopted and my husband and I make a joke that it’s painfully obvious which kids are adopted and which are biological as he is 6′ 6″ and I am 5′ 11″. :)

      • Obladi Oblada

        …and your boy is a handsome devil.

      • FormerlyKnownAsWendy

        Life goes on! I just got the screen name…..

      • Obladi Oblada

        You win! You’re the first one to say anything about it. :)

    • FormerlyKnownAsWendy

      We live right next to a walking path that’s a few miles long (but before you get jealous, has absolutely zero shade). I always take a stroller, even if I push it a ways empty (or the kids do) because I know that one of them is going to whine and bitch and moan and beg to be carried when we’re two miles away from home if I don’t have it. I will push/carry that wheely bastard empty for 2 miles if I must to avoid carrying a toddler two miles back. I’m kind of the opposite of the man in your story because I look with great pity (but don’t say so) upon the moms who *don’t* have their big kids in a stroller…because I know that on the way back, I will see them hot and sweaty, staggering under the weight of a hot, sweaty, wailing, red-faced kid. And it rarely fails.

    • http://carrie-murphy.com/ Carrie Murphy

      OMG THAT’S HIM?!?! He’s beyond.

    • sierschula

      I was in the same boat with my oldest. It wasn’t really the people saying she was to old for a stroller that bothered me, it was the other parents in the park. I swear they thought she was retarded or slow and would always shoo their kids away from her.

    • C.J.

      I had this problem with my children too. Not just with the people making comments about the stroller but having a bottle or soother too. My older daughter was 2 when my younger one was born but she looked much older. I would put them in the double stroller and would get the occasional person make a comment to me or about it where I could hear. I don’t live in Florida though so I didn’t have to be nice about it. My older one eventually evened out but my little one who is 8 is as tall as a 10 year old. People still think she is older than what she is. Your son is adorable!

    • Jayamama

      My daughter just turned two, and she’s always been on the chunky side. Pairing the fact that she looks at least three and the fact that her speech is delayed slightly means that I get a lot of strange looks for having the three- or four-year-old who is still speaking nonsense words. I just pretend that I can understand her perfectly (even though more than half is still a mystery) and make them feel stupid for not being able to understand what she’s saying. It’s so obvious, duh!

    • Ligeia

      My one year old son is on the large side for his age, but he’s got tall parents. It has annoyed me to no end since he was born that random people will comment on his size as if it were terribly weird and wrong that he should be taller and thereby heavier than other kids. At three months old a doctor consulted her clipboard and squinted suspiciously saying “Hmm, it says here he’s three months.” and when I said “Yes??” she replied “Really??? He’s just SO BIG!”. You know, like she didn’t believe me. I wanted to ask her is she was sure she was a healthcare professional. I suppose a lot of people don’t mean to sound critical, but I wonder when it will stop being acceptable to comment on a physical attribute that he has no control over. When he’s in school? When he can understand that they are calling him freakishly big?

    • BW2

      I don’t push my 3-year old in a single stroller but do use a double stroller when I take him and my 5-month old baby out around the neighborhood. I learned my lesson when I was pregnant and my son would just refuse to walk or ride his bike home. He is too big to carry so I would have to call a friend to pick us up. I love taking early morning walks with both of them for exercise. Also, we often take picnics to the park and it is great for carrying what we need underneath.

    • Amber

      I still put my almost 4 – yr old in a stroller. It’s just easier. Keep doing what you’re doing. You gotta live your life. No one else does.

    • http://ichasekids.com/ Litterboxjen

      My kid was a late walker (like, 20 months old before she was really even taking toddling steps on her own), and would navigate everywhere on her knees. Damn straight I used the stroller as often as I needed it, and woe betide anyone who tried to say something to me about it.

      We also got people telling us when she was 3 months old that we’d have to stop her from sucking her fingers (she sucks her front two fingers instead of a thumb) when she was two/three/whatever age they felt that the “inappropriate” behaviour should stop. I would just smile and not say anything more often than not, because fuck ‘em, she’s my kid and I’m happy she’s happy.

      I have a cousin-in-law whose little boy looks a year older than he is, so people always expect him to be behaving differently than he does. It’s tough for her.

    • JulesInFL

      Thank you for this. I actually find myself bringing the stroller out MORE these days for my two-year-old. She’s gotten big enough that I really can’t carry her for long distances without really paying for it the next day. And of course, toddlers will pick the farthest point from your destination to decide that NOPE! they are not walking another step. So I often accompany her, walking next to me, while I push an empty stroller. Because if/when she decides to stop walking, I want the option to push her.

      Oh, and your boy really is beautiful!

    • lin

      I don’t tell people that kids should be walking every time I see one being strapped into a carseat. How is that better than a stroller? People don’t get that sometimes you aren’t just going for a walk and your kid might not be able to handle a long walk. For some reason it would be acceptable to drive there, but not to uring a stroller for the kid. Makes no sense.

    • angels mom

      Gosh i cant stand it when other people make comments like that…your the mom you know best.. What is it of anyones business if he is big and in a stroller… your rite not like your gonna keep it until he is in college..

    • Kimberly

      My son had a bone cyst and was in a spica cast for 6 weeks and then could not walk for weeks after. I carried him into the barber shop one day (he is 3 1/2, 65# and 45″ tall) and the woman there said ” I thought you were a big boy”. I said “he is a big boy, but he can’t walk” and REMINDED her that he had his cast on and just got it off. People are just so rude. Luckily, it hit me much harder than him, but, why do people feel they have a right to say something?

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