If you visit the BabyCenter boards at any time during your pregnancy, it will be confirmed that judgy is a word. But how judgy can you actually be?
I will answer your question with our favorite Mommyish game: Real or Fake? No cheating! Take the time to work your way through and give your best guess for each judgy parenting post that may or may not be found on the BabyCenter boards…
Real or Fake: Moms, what is your biggest pet peeve?
1. Dressing Non-Twins As Twins (How Dare You)
I have a friend with 2 sons – age 5 and nearly 3. Every time I see those kids, they’re wearing the same outfits. She really, really hates shopping, so I can only assume that when she buys clothes for them, she just buys two of everything. Or something.
Answer: REAL. This BabyCenter mom hates her friend’s audacity to dare dress her non-twin children in matchy-matchy clothing. Sure, the sentiment may be a little annoying, but aren’t there starving children in Africa somewhere?
2. A Child That Shares The Same Birthday (How DARE You)
I find nothing more annoying than a child in my son’s class that has the same birthday. His party is totally overshadowed, and I have to work together with another mom to plan some kind of “joint venture”. The teacher should find a way to space birthdays out so that nobody shares.
Answer: FAKE. Since there are billions of people in the world, the odds are that your special snowflake is going to share a birthday with somebody. Better hope it’s somebody cool, like Betty White who shares my son’s birthday. Too bad she’s not in his class.
3. Healthy Parents, Unhealthy Kids (How Dare YOU)
Have a friend her girls are 4 and 1, she does it all the time!!!… I hate when the parents eat really healthy, but they feed their kids junk!
Answer: REAL. Maybe these parents are assholes, or maybe, just maybe, their kids are like all other kids on the planet and refuse to eat a damn vegetable. “Food for thought.”
4. Parents Of Overly Friendly Kids (HOW Dare You)
This happens to us all the time at playgrounds: we are playing with our kid, who’s almost 4. Other parents are totally checked out, so their kids glom onto us. Why do parents think that’s okay? Do they really think I want to play with their 8 year-old just became I brought my own kid to the park?
Answer: REAL. I kinda get the fact that this can be annoying, but perhaps you could be nice to a poor kid that just wants someone to play with when their parents aren’t paying attention to them? I feel bad for the kid most of all in this scenario—save the irritation.
5. Parents Walking Ahead Of Kids (HOW DARE YOUUUU)
When a family is walking down the street and the parents are walking ahead of the their children. Hello? It only takes a second for the kid to run into the street or for someone to snatch them.
Answer: REAL. Chill, hall monitor! How old are the kids in this scenario? Maybe the parents have talked to them extensively about street safety. Maybe they are old enough to walk on the sidewalk on their own. Maybe not all families want to walk in a straight line with arms linked like the Von Trapp family.
*Note: I fully realize that most of the answers in this game are REAL. I couldn’t help myself because some parents are REAL JUDGY™.
(photo: Getty Images)