Someone is letting the Internet name their baby again. Why is this happening? More importantly, why is this happening on Reddit?
Reddit is basically a place where people come together to insult each other, have virtual drum circles, and be as offensive as they possibly can. Why someone would choose this forum to pick a name for their child is beyond me:
Hi, My name is Stephen and much to the disbelief of my wife, I have decided to let the internet name* my daughter.
Yeah that is an asterisk, Unfortunately internet I know better than to trust you. We will ultimately be making the final decision, Alas my daughter shall not be named WackyTaco692. Sorry guys the wife wouldn’t go for a free for all.
Well, then you’re not really letting the Internet name your daughter, are you? I don’t even understand the point of your website now, since you have ultimate veto power – but I get it. I wouldn’t let Reddit name my child either. Here are a few more sites that you should definitely never let name your child.
4Chan is basically the sewer of the Internet. “4chan.org is the self-proclaimed Internet home for people who lack a social conscience.” That sentence is from Fox News. I just agreed with Fox News. This should illustrate how bad this site is. If you have an interest in breeding a future misogynist or racist with no social skills, you should source your name from this site.
“Life is short. Have an affair.®” This site seriously trademarked that sentence. This would be a great place to source your baby’s name if you have no interest in honesty or integrity.
Do you plan on raising an entitled bitch? Source your name from Urban Baby, a site filled with mothers complaining about their nannies, Birkin bags, and beachside resort homes. Nothing is ever good enough for an Urban Mommy.
A better decision than probably any of the above, but it may get a little weird. Do you really want a daughter named Princess or a son named Major? Named by somebody who really thinks that owning a “virtual pet” is a thing? I think… no.
I don’t know if it’s for publicity, or ad dollars, or pageviews or what – but this “Internet baby naming trend” has got to stop.
(photo: Getty Images)