You’ll Have To Pry My Black Leggings Out Of My Cold, Dead Hands

143130759This morning, I was drinking my coffee perusing some blogs when a headline jumped out at me; Ditch Your Boring Black Leggings! My soul responded; No. No way in hell. Why would I ever do that?

It turns out the article wasn’t trying to get you abandon your legging game – it was just trying to get you to step it up with some prints and such. No matter. The very thought of losing my leggings sent a chill straight up my spine. Black leggings are a lifeline for women like myself.

I’ve always had quite the booty. It’s something I own with pride – even now, when it’s bigger than it’s ever been (thank you second baby and newfound aversion to the gym). Black leggings are a curvy girls necessity. I’m not exactly sure when leggings came back into fashion (2005ish?) but I greeted them with open arms. Years of “the boyfriend jean” had nearly destroyed my faith in mankind.

Have you ever tried to shove a big butt into a “boyfriend jean” cut? You know the style – straight leg and incredibly low waisted? These are the worst when your hip to butt ratio is like mine. I’d always have to go at least two sizes too big to actually fit my ass and thighs into them, which caused an interesting situation to happen every time I sat down; let’s just call it the butt-gap. The butt-gap occurs when the waist of your jeans is too big and the hips and thigh region are way too tight. The pants look totally normal when you are standing – in fact, they even have a slimming effect. As soon as you sit, people in the room may or may not begin using your jeans as a receptacle for a makeshift drinking game.

Now that I am a mother of two, I am a proud member of the Frumpy Mom™ movement coined by our very own Eve Vawter. While I do not think I’m frumpy at all, I am now old enough not to give a shit if leggings go out of style. I will still continue to wear them, just like my mom still wears the pastel pink lipstick that was all the rage in the early 80′s. When it came back again, 25 years later, she was ahead of the curve; a tastemaker. I plan to do the same thing for leggings.

I, alone, will hold your torch black leggings. I will fight for your longevity. I will champion your cause.

(photo: Getty Images)

You can reach this post's author, Maria Guido, on twitter.
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    • Fuzzy Selfie

      Are you inviting us to take off your leggings??? O_o

    • Janok Place

      Even as a skinny, no butt girl I can comfortably say I do not mourn the boyfriend jean. Seriously, that much butt crack does not need to be seen anywhere. Period. As someone who revels in frumpy sweaters 4 sizes too big, I also will not abandon my leggings.

      • Bunny Lucia

        The boyfriend jeans didn’t look good on ANYBODY. I was once talking to a friend who is a lesbian and she told me how she rejoiced the death of boyfriend jeans because now she can spot a lesbian in a crowd instead of accidentally hitting on a straight girl

      • Kay_Sue

        Not a single damn soul. I don’t know whose idea those were, but they should be shin-kicked.

      • ElleJai

        I have a pair of boyfriend jeans I bought several sizes too small when they came into fashion, and I’m only now about to be able to wear them.

        Apparently this will not be a plus, but I need to wear them for at least a month since I’ve waited so long to recoup the investment!

    • jsterling93

      I will hold the torch with you. I am another big booty tiny waist (less tiny after the baby) girl who can’t stand most jeans but can rock a pair of leggings.

    • Muggle

      Curvy girl necessity? I’m curvy (but small) and I can’t find a pair of leggings that can fit over my really round ass. :( I think it’s more to do with how badly proportioned mass-produced clothing can be if you’re not a medium, though.

      • guest

        i don’t know your wherabouts – BUT joe fresh ‘riding leggings’ thicker than regular cotton material but same legging look. my new everyday staple!!

    • sammumtwins

      haha here I am commenting in my black leggings right now. Since having my twins a year ago I rarely wear anything but these leggings!

    • Alicia Kiner

      Ah, the butt gap. Hate it. Almost as much as I hate the belt digging into my skin to counteract the butt gap. I have recently discovered skinny jeans which surprisingly fit and don’t look bad AND are slightly warmer than leggings. I have been known to, on really cold days like today, wear both a pair of black leggings AND skinny jeans, with my comfortably oversized sweater. As long as the leggings don’t have stirrups, I’m all for them!!

      • Maddi Holmes

        You should look into ‘Wizard Jeans’ they’re all made with stretch denim and some are high waisted (which is good for me because I have a high waist), and as an added bonus they’re designed to make your butt look good (and they succeed). They can be pricey but they’re soooo worth it, I only own one pair but they’re the only jeans I’ll wear now. Best buy of my life.

      • ElleJai

        Oh man, stirrups! My Nana used to sew them in for me and I LOVED them as a kid!

        Wouldn’t wear them now though, but it just took me back to the early 90s for a moment.

    • Emily Wight

      YOU AND ME BOTH. And my purple leggings, and my grey leggings with the sparkles, and my leggings with the cats in space on them. Leggings and sweater dresses are how I pretend I’ve pulled myself together. Jeans are for ladies who care and/or know where their waists are.

      • http://twitter.com/mariaguido Maria Guido

        Leggings and sweater dresses are my go to. For real.

      • AugustW

        If my daughter can rock them, I figure I’m allowed.

    • Alanna Jorgensen

      I do NOT miss the butt gap. I thought I was the only weirdo suffering with it. I feel better knowing that it was actually an epidemic.

    • Rachel Sea

      I’m not comfortable wearing leggings as pants because it feels too revealing, but I love leggings in lieu of tights or long johns in cold weather. The fit and comfort are better than either, and often for less.

      • Katia

        Well yeah wear them with a skirt or long shirt or shorts. I don’t use them interchangeably with pants or anything!

      • Rachel

        I only wear mine as pants if I’m going to the gym or physical therapy or something like that, and as of the past few months if I happen to have them on in the house and don’t feel like wrestling with jeans to go to the post office or something. In all cases, I am wearing a tunic/hoodie, so nothing above mid-thigh is visible. I’m pregnant, though, so I hope I get some kind of fashion pass.

    • JPen

      LEGGINGS FOR LIFE!!

    • Ptownsteveschick

      Black skinny jeggings, but they have an actual zipper and button. I’ve found the loophole!

    • 21foothouse

      For me, legging have been the only reason I have started wearing dresses. The length of dress that I like is those that fall right at the knee. Anything longer makes me feel like I am trying to hide something, which I’m not, since I would bet my legs are my best asset. However as a tom boy who never got used to wearing skirts or dresses I was always self conscious about sitting down. What if my dress rode up? What if it got caught on something? What if somehow I ended up showing off more than I meant. Leggings have removed that worry entirely and I went from owning absolutely no dresses, to owning three and a skirt that I absolutely LOVE, as long as I wear them with my leggings (Black or brown) and my boots. They’ve allowed me to put myself together and feel able to dress more feminine while remaining comfortable and less self conscious.

    • LiteBrite

      Where’s the petition to keep black leggings in style? Cuz I’m totally signing that one.

      Black leggings make me look pulled together, even when I feel like shit. Throw a black shirt, long cardigan, and boots on and BAM! Instant style. Add some big sunglasses, and I go move about in public, even while hungover.

      • Tommyboy

        I would sign that petition I say forever in style

    • Kay_Sue

      I do not have a booty–at all–and I still love my leggings. I will gladly defend your right to wear them forever. I am glad they are back in style.

      I do, sometimes, get a little wild with them, but black is my stand-by, and paired with a sweater dress and my black pirate hooker boots (my dad named them), they make me say, “Arrrr!” :-P

    • AugustW

      Hahaha, I actually went out and did errands the other day in my gym pants because my jeans weren’t dry yet. It was both liberating and embarrassing at the same time. I’m a big girl but I feel really confident in the gym pants, probably because my brain associates them with doing BodyPump and being generally awesome.

    • Katia

      Agreed. Actually here and there I get anxiety about when they will be totally dated. I don’t want to look ridiculous .. Maybe at that point ill afford (and fit my butt into) more proper attire, I hope so.
      White leggings look great on me too(maybe you could try), surprised me because in highschool white flare jeans were not a great idea for my body type.

    • esuzanne

      I firmly believe that leggings do not count as pants. Which is why I love wearing them always and forever and everywhere. Screw you, society. You can’t ruffle my feathers. I AM NOT EVEN WEARING PANTS—and that’s how seriously I take you.

    • Kidnic

      This is exactly why I just bought a sewing machine. I spend a fortune in alterations.

      Try being posteriorless. I’m forced to wear Hello Kitty children’s swimsuit bottoms. I’m thin, yet skinny jeans make my lower half resemble two used condoms tied in a knot.

      And gravity is a treacherous bitch. My ass has become this sluggish landslide down the back of my thighs, though it doesn’t even technically exist.

      Screw you, Genetics!

      In sum, I feel you.

    • Maddi Holmes

      I feel ya. My friends affectionately call my butt the “ghetto booty.” Leggings are my life and I will love them forever.

    • koolchicken

      Say what you will about “the boyfriend” jean but for those of us cursed with a waist the same size as our hips that cut is a godsend. As for leggings, they’re a bit harder to pull off when you have no curves at all. I have to use them like tights, not pants.

      • ElleJai

        Same thing applies when you’re overweight.

        I still can’t live without them, but they’re essentially just awesome, non decaying tights.

    • Rowan

      The concept of boyfriend jeans is weird. “Look, I’m cute and quirky cos I’m wearing my boyfriend’s clothes!” Yet if you swap the genders round, it enters a whole realm of odd. “Hey, I’m wearing my girlfriend’s clothes. Aren’t I adorable?” Um, no.

    • CW

      I would like the “skinny” jeans look to go away ASAP and never return. Sorry, but they only look good on women who are tall and slim-hipped and that is SO not me. I’m not at all overweight (I wear a size 4P) but I do have an hourglass figure and skinny jeans make my hips look AWFUL. Don’t miss the “boyfriend” jeans either but at least when those were in style it was still easy to find regular bootcut jeans. Now it seems like all the stores stock are “skinny” styles.

      • moonie27

        I’m not a fan of skinny jeans but the more I see them on different body types, the more I think they work with different body types. Plus, they do look good tucked into a boot, that’s for sure.

        But my problem with skinny jeans is that I think they just look weird on any legs that have any sort of curve – which is weird, because in skirts and shorts, I think muscled legs with some bulk look AMAZING.

    • Cardiganchic

      I suspect you feel about leggings the way I feel about 3/4 length button up all season fabric type cardigans. I have my black ones that I love and hold dear to my heart and then about 30 others of various colors and textures. I cried a little when some kid at work referred to my look as “hipster” bc I wear one everyday. No sir, this is a lifelong commitment that goes back decades. Be gone now.

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    • Tommyboy

      I am a guy and I support leggings never going out of style I however see them as pants and the invention of them as being genius if you got them forever rock em ladies :)