• Mon, Dec 9 - 12:00 pm ET

The Snuggle House Has Closed Before Any Of Us Had A Chance To Get Snuggled

The Snuggle House ClosesI’m pretty stocked up on snuggles. I have a husband, many children, and a dog and a cat. But let’s say that I wanted additional snuggles or to have a giant snuggle-palooza on a special occasion, that won’t be happening anymore because the Snuggle House in Madison, Wisconsin has closed. Where will we get our snuggles now, I ask you? The Snuggle House didn’t even have a going out of business buy-one-get-one free snuggle sale or anything, they just sadly closed their snuggly doors just three weeks after opening. All because some city officials who just didn’t appreciate a good snuggle worried that it was a front for snuggling of a more sexual nature. From The WSJ.com:

“The Snuggle House is Officially Closed — for good. For those people who supported us, thank you. Snuggle on!” the post read.

No specific reason was given, but The Snuggle House, whose November opening was delayed for one month because of city concerns, posted this reply to Facebook questions: “The push back and harassment is not worth it, honestly.”

 

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According to the Daily Mail,  There were some legitimate concerns raised from Assistant city attorney Jennifer Zilavy ,  who said her first thought when she heard about the Snuggle House was ‘OK, this is going to be a place of prostitution.’ She said owner Matthew Hurtado initially had no business plan, no business insurance, no training protocols and no answers when she asked him what he would do if a snuggler was sexually assaulted.

I can see where it might be a good idea to have this plan of action in order before you open your doors to random snuggling. Another reason why this story is so heartbreaking to me, and I’m sure will be to all of you too, is that the snuggle house offered a snuggle school where we could have all become professional snugglers. From their website:

SnuggleU (TM) and The Snuggle House (TM) present a first-of-its-kind Therapeutic Cuddling certification program. This program consists of material that provides the cuddler and the client a quality-controlled experience through a vast training experience that each ‘Professional Snuggler’ is encouraged to complete before engaging in paid sessions with the public. SnuggleU (TM) covers safety, cuddling sessions, appropriate conduct & behavior, and even promotion and marketing to ensure a consistent and congruent message and session protocol for a successful business operation. We expect our “Professional Snugglers” to represent a high level of integrity, professionalism, and a standard of excellence! Having such high standards allows our clients to feel that they are literally in good hands, and ensure a positive experience. SnuggleU(TM) is exclusively offered through The Snuggle House(TM) and currently features 10-HOURS of minimum course study and 15-hours of session-time, combined with 5-hours of self-promotion and marketing field experience. These are not idle-hours, they are jam-packed and focused with laser-precision and the entire course slams from front-to-back with fun and results-based instructional guidelines, protocols, and procedures. Once you have graduated from SnuggleU(TM), you are ready for being ‘Inside The Cuddle!’

The courses from SnuggleU were jam packed and focused with laser precision. I guess now that the Snuggle House is closed we can no longer get our degrees from Snuggle U so that dream is dead too.

I’m not going to tell anyone how to run their snuggle business, but I do think that this all could have been rectified had they offered the services of professional kittens and puppies to cuddle with. And maybe babies. I think we should all agree that when we open our own snuggle empire we will have these things.

(Images:Facebook)

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  • http://wtfihaveakid.blogspot.ca/ jendra_berri

    I suppose we’ll all just have to get our laser-precise snuggles for free now.

  • Julia Sonenshein

    Come over bring puppies let’s snuggle. That dude can’t come.

    • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

      That dude is nowhere near allowed

    • Bethany Ramos

      This is one of my fave GIFs evahhhhh.

    • Bethany Ramos

      Did this guy run the Snuggle Brothel?
      http://i.imgur.com/ZUXjT.gif

    • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

      If he did, I would have so went to there, but not if he were the actual nazi snuggler, but as in the Chris Waltz snuggler

    • ted3553

      seriously. someone would have to pay me a lot of money to have that dude snuggle me. A Lot!

  • Tinyfaeri

    When I become a cuddle madam, I will also provide the cuddling service of puppies and kittens.

    • NicknamesAreDull

      I would pay you so much money. Puppy cuddles are the best. Especially (because I’m biased) pug cuddles.

    • Tinyfaeri

      First puppy cuddle is on the house!

    • Natasha B

      I would pay $60 an hour to snuggle some puppies.

  • candyvines

    When I want to pay $60 to have strangers touch me I just shop at Whole Foods.

  • Véronique Houde

    There’s a girl that hangs out with my friends (so sometimes I’m “stuck” with her too) and she has this obsession with petting your hair, which she calls fluff. She’ll come up to a perfect stranger with these doe eyes, and ask them if she can fluff their hair. She can do it for more than half an hour I swear to God. It’s weird as fuck. She wants asked if she could fluff my daughter and I totally went all crazy and said “NO you CANNOT fluff my daughter.” Once, my friend shaved off his beard, and she actually asked if she could keep his facial hair ball. To this day, she still walks around with said hair ball in her purse, and sometimes takes it out so she can smell it. True story. This reminds me of this girl. I’m sure she would have made a great snuggler. It’s the content of my nightmares…

    • FormerlyKnownAsWendy

      I think there might be something seriously wrong there….

  • Frozen_Dude x12

    If anyone is interested I will be offering free snuggles all day tomorrow and Friday. Just let me know and I’ll stop by and give you your own free special snuggle.

  • rompy Room Raff

    Free snuggles and raff rides here <—-